Artificial Stupidity

The worst (and funniest) enemy 'intelligence' in gaming exposed

Words: on April 18, 2008

Having played hundreds of games over the years, we have to say true artificial intelligence is rare. Does Seaman really learn to speak? Did the AI in Forza 2 really learn how to double-brake? Who knows. What we do know, however, is that it's very easy to confuse a computer – sometimes without doing anything at all.

We can happily type that into one without fear of reprisal as the office PCs don't have robotic arms (yet). So for now, we can laugh – as will you. Bring it on.

Crysis (PC)
As we understand it, most of the videos on YouTube of Crysis' allegedly poor AI come from the pre-release demo of the game or player-created maps. So don't think this is necessarily the final game being rubbish. Still, there used to a be a bridge there...



Then there's the conversation that becomes decidedly one-way...



And finally the realisation that you're in too deep (the AI characters die in water for some reason). But maybe some spectacles are in order?


Related

Games:


Crysis (PC)

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The Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion (PS3)

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Platforms:

Xbox 360, PS3, PC

28 Comments
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  • jackloder

    jackloder  - 1 year, 4 months ago  - Report

    any of the oblivion ones could be fake... just saying is all
  • theintellectual

    theintellectual  - 1 year, 5 months ago  - Report

    whoa how did the guy get a cape in oblivion?? ive looked all over for that!!!
  • wiitard07

    wiitard07  - 1 year, 6 months ago  - Report

    MIMIMIMIMIMIMIMIMIMIMIMIMIMIMI!!!!!
  • ryno

    ryno  - 2 years, 6 months ago  - Report

    mimimimimimimimimimi lol in oblivion that guy keeps annoying everyone even when dead muwa hahahahahaha
  • zayleffein

    zayleffein  - 2 years, 7 months ago  - Report

    The raking the carpet made me laugh. Also teabagging the crazy argonian lady bahahahahaha!
    Man I love Oblivion :)
  • C0d3munk3y

    C0d3munk3y  - 2 years, 7 months ago  - Report

    nenenenenenenenene!
  • AngryScotsman

    AngryScotsman  - 2 years, 7 months ago  - Report

    The Oblivion "Oblivious AI" one was especially funny as every attack was a "sneak attack"
  • slamansnikovski

    slamansnikovski  - 2 years, 9 months ago  - Report

    these were hilarious, although in the crysis diing in the water i think he was attacked by a shark, i'm serious, sharks attack if you stay in the water.
  • ranzatsu

    ranzatsu  - 2 years, 9 months ago  - Report

    Reminds me of the time when I saw a guy run up and down the stairs in Assassin's Creed.
  • IAmTheWii

    IAmTheWii  - 2 years, 9 months ago  - Report

    It's an LOZ pinata party!
  • linkganon

    linkganon  - 2 years, 10 months ago  - Report

    oh that reminds me, on the donkey kong level on melee, face ness. be sure he's player 2 and he will do a double jump right into the water for a win in 3 seconds.
  • Sebastian16

    Sebastian16  - 2 years, 10 months ago  - Report

    Heheh.
  • ChocoMongoose

    ChocoMongoose  - 2 years, 10 months ago  - Report

    Oblivion intelligence is the best it almost purposely breaks itself for your amusement those were bad dogs and a weedy carpet
  • wasabi31

    wasabi31  - 2 years, 10 months ago  - Report

    lmao, all of the oblivion stuff was hilariousss!!
  • musashi1596

    musashi1596  - 2 years, 10 months ago  - Report

    In their defence, I have played against far stupider human opponents.
  • Liamrules42

    Liamrules42  - 2 years, 10 months ago  - Report

    wow, AI can be reeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaally dumb
  • ryno

    ryno  - 2 years, 6 months ago  - Report

    sorry i didnet know she was a chick
  • gatornation1254

    gatornation1254  - 2 years, 7 months ago  - Report

    wow thats hilariously sad

    reCAPTCHA: lindley fact
  • hardcore_gamer1990

    hardcore_gamer1990  - 2 years, 9 months ago  - Report

    Stupid AI in Assassin's Creed?

    What about those beggar women?
    I'M BLATENTLY AN ASSASSIN! LEAVE ME ALONE! GO PESTER ONE OF THOSE GUARDS, IT'LL HELP ME SNEAK PAST!

    lol :D
  • someonetgsn

    someonetgsn  - 2 years, 9 months ago  - Report

    xD MGS stupidity at its finest! =)great article, even I havent seen AI this stupid. (except in MGS)
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