What type of GTA player are you?

Outside of the main archetypes, there are numerous subtypes that can manifest temporarily within or run as a constant undercurrent to one or more culprits. These are the Accomplices, the tiny devils and angels we conjure up on a whim for a quick chuckle, or perhaps come across as glimpses of our shadow aspects, or even actively cultivate as a means of exploration into the hidden corners of our psyches.

The Latent Sociopath
Maybe you’ve encountered one too many bullies, maybe you’d like to blow off steam, or maybe you’d “Just like to see how a crowd would react to sudden gunfire.” When the Sociopath manifests, he shows a tendency to focus his bloodlust on pedestrians and EMTs instead of more dangerous targets like gangsters or cops. Frequently associated with all culprits, but has the greatest chance of appearing alongside the Sandbox Sandinista and the Hater.

The Risk Addict
Whether it’s looking for the greatest thrill, or stepping up to the ultimate challenge, or simply expressing the need to attention whore, the Risk Addict will cause a ruckus right in front of cops for the sole purpose of inducing a chase. They will then proceed to build as many stars as possible- and still get away. The Risk Addict will try to push the danger further each time, seeking an escape from an entire army of law enforcement. The lure of “getting away with it” is irresistible. The obvious associate is the Sandbox Sandinista, but a surprising number of Storytellers may be caught enacting this naughty deed, if only due to inadvertent uppage of heat during a plot mission. Completists rarely have the time for such low-yield fooling around (at least after completing any related achievements), and Haters won’t have the skills to shake the Feds or worse.

The David Koresh
A variation on the Risk Addict. The major difference, of course, is that the Koresh isn’t interested in getting away- they’ll go out in the most spectacular blaze of glory possible. Sandbox Sandinistas will surely dabble in this, and even Haters can get their fair share, although their blaze will probably be more of a poof.

The Physicist
Each GTA world is a massive playground of heavy, bendy, and momentum-maintaining toys. From people, to cars, to ramps and roofs, there’s no end to the ways in which one object can smash into another. The Physicist aims to find out just how far this can be taken. Some may try to break the game, while others want to create “performance art,” which may just have to involve a van, a fire hydrant, a ramp, and a hapless morning jogger. With the new suped-up physics in GTAIV, every culprit will undoubtedly put on the white lab coat now and again.

The Joyrider

It is called Grand Theft Auto after all. While you’d be hard pressed to find someone that played a GTA without stealing a car, the Joyrider takes it one step further. It may involve the simple pleasure of dragging an innocent driver from their pride and joy at a stoplight, or it may focus on finding the perfect ride, but it all comes down to a focus on taking in Liberty City from behind-the-wheel. Joyriders tend to know where all the best cars are located, and they can make a beeline to their motor of choice from any area of the city, probably while asleep. Completists make almost mandatory Joyriders, while Haters coming off a Burnout Paradise binge might be found ogling a black Rumpo so they can “Cruise around in the child molester machine.”

The Roleplayer (AKA: The Lover, the Bling Seeker, the Dollmaker)
The Roleplayer takes a keen interest in the “lifestyle” that GTA offers. Fancying himself a virtual Don Juan, he might court every female character from the story, and will certainly make a few “appointments” with various Working Girls. If he wants to live out the gangsta fantasy, he’ll be sure to acquire a suitable lowrider and pimp it out exhaustively. The Dollmakers, well they just really like to play dress-up, possibly while talking about how “badass” their hero looks to preserve some sense of manliness. Every culprit tends to manifest this Accomplice and its variances.

The Good Samaritan
What, you didn’t believe these exist in GTA? We’ll admit to manifesting some ourselves. There is something amusing, and strangely relaxing (and not to mention challenging) about attempting to drive the speed limit, stopping at every red light, and staying within the painted lines. At the very least it’s a refreshing change of pace from all the mayhem. Some Storytellers take on the challenge of trying to complete the game while shedding as little blood as possible, painting the picture of a flawed hero that only enacted force when necessary. Completists probably won’t have time for it while precious achievements sit fallow. Sandbox Sandinistas usually can’t pull it off for long before needing to scratch the destruction itch. The funniest manifestation has to be in the Haters- they may genuinely not know that you can get away with roaring through red lights, or they might play the Good Samaritan just to rub in your face that they won’t lower themselves to the “lowbrow thrills” that their favorite games are above. If you’ve never tried it, give it a whirl- it’s a surreal twist to hem yourself in with such an unrestrictive world around you- if only for a little while, before plunging back into the urban chaos.

So what type of GTA player are you? Got more categories? Sound off in ourforums.

Apr 15, 2008