The Least Faithful Movie Games

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By published

Game not fun enough? Make stuff up!

Movie
Kevin McCallister is woefully separated from his entire family a second time; instead in this installment he catches the wrong plane and spends Christmas in New York. During his stay, he commits fraud by maxing out his father’s credit card, befriends a homeless woman and evades criminals that want to murder him.


Game (SNES)
Home Alone 2 plays like a child’s nightmare in that every grownup/household appliance is literally out to get them. Kevin avoids deadly suitcases and vaccums, while bums and the hotel concierge want to kill/sexually assault him for some reason. Sadly, unlike the movie, theTalkboydoes not feature into the game.


Movie
Harry Callahan is a tough cop who takes the worst cases and resolves them with a big gun. At odds with his superiors (ya’know, for not doing his job properly), he usually battles serial killers and rapists. And uh… wins. With bullets.


Game (NES)
Released a scant 19 years after the film, the NES version of DH is almost exactly like the film. Just replace normalcy with batshit lunacy. Not only is Harry karate-kicking furniture for items, but he also hops over snakes, electric traps and completely murders every criminal in the area. Just another day on the beat.


Movie
Paleontologists, children and one wily mathematician are invited by an optimistic businessman to endorse his dinosaur theme park (so he can look good to investors). One dead Nedry later, and God’s abortions are eating people and terrorizing an island.


Game (SNES)
Alan Grant is loaded to the nines with weapons to incapacitate dinos at every turn. Strangely, the game switches to an FPS once you enter buildings, becoming a sort of Wolfenstein clone. That’s weird considering the point of the Jurassic Park franchise is that humans are in peril, and not purposefully hunting the most savage beasts that once roamed the planet.