50 Worst Movie Titles

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By published

Movies that are begging not to be seen

The Goods: Live Hard. Sell Hard. (2009)

Killer Klowns From Outer Space (1988)

Why So Terrible: They couldn’t even spell ‘clowns’ right! That said, the crummy title is the least of this ridiculous B-horror’s problems – don’t even get us started on the cotton candy cocoons.

What It Should Have Been Called: Coulrophobia . It sounds smart and it educates people.

Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium (2007)

Why So Terrible: Ever heard of a name like Magorium? No, because it was made up specifically to rhyme with the word ‘emporium’. Dumb.

What It Should Have Been Called: Mr. Medifice’s Magic Edifice.

Step Into Liquid (2003)

Why So Terrible: Instead of stirring up evocative surfer-boy imagery, that title instead makes us think about how annoying it is when you step in a wet patch on the kitchen floor and get sodden socks.

What It Should Have Been Called: Get Wet.

A Nymphoid Barbarian In Dinosaur Hell (1990)

Why So Terrible: It’s a bit late coming to the barbarian table – a whole six years after Arnie’s second Conan flick. Nobody cares about prehistoric brutes anymore, so why put them in the title?

What It Should Have Been Called: Dinosaur Hell would’ve done fine on its own, dontcha think?

Avenging Disco Godfather (1979)

Why So Terrible: The ‘Avenging’ part we can deal with, but the ‘Disco Godfather’ bit just makes us imagine Marlon Brando in flares and glittery star sunglasses.

What It Should Have Been Called: Disco Inferno .

Blacula! (1972)

Why So Terrible: Everybody’s favourite vampire (or, the vampire) gets turned into a camp blaxploitation laughing stock. Is that Bram Stoker rolling around in his grave?

What It Should Have Been Called: Camp Dracula.

Fertilize The Blaspheming Bombshell (1990)

Why So Terrible: Just how does one go about fertilising a bomb? Oh, right, the bombshell’s a chick. Still, that's a somewhat queasy, clinical call to arms for a film title.

What It Should Have Been Called: Brooklyn To Vegas (the journey the Satan-worshipper-plagued bombshell is undertaking).

The Ghost In The Invisible Bikini (1966)

Why So Terrible: It’s a beach flick that doesn’t even take place anywhere near a beach. Also, it’s a horribly transparent attempt to hook a horny young demographic who just want to see naked ladies.

What It Should Have Been Called: Life’s A Beach.

Garfield: A Tail of Two Kitties (2006)

Why So Terrible: The memory of Charles Dickens is raped by a horrible CGI cat and his stupid movie. Not that we’re taking it all too seriously or anything.

What It Should Have Been Called: Garfield 2: Purrfectly Awful .

Joshua Winning

Josh Winning has worn a lot of hats over the years. Contributing Editor at Total Film, writer for SFX, and senior film writer at the Radio Times. Josh has also penned a novel about mysteries and monsters, is the co-host of a movie podcast, and has a library of pretty phenomenal stories from visiting some of the biggest TV and film sets in the world. He would also like you to know that he "lives for cat videos..." Don't we all, Josh. Don't we all.