Mass Effect 3: Not happy with the ending? Choose one of these 20 alternative endings instead

We put our mastery of endings to good use

Words: Matt Cundy on March 16, 2012

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manu_erizo - March 16, 2012 11:03 a.m.

Megaman Legends ending: Shepard is stranded in that planet alone, without any means to return to Earth. Meanwhile, Garrus and whatever chick you banged during the game are fighting over who will build the ship to rescue him. Sequel is cancelled halfway during production.
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slimjim441 - March 16, 2012 12:32 p.m.

Or the Mega Man ending: Turns out the Reapers were created by Dr. Wily. You fight through another castle, get to the teleport system and Quick Man kills you.
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MetroidPrimeRib - March 16, 2012 10:46 a.m.

Deus Ex Ending:
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db1331 - March 16, 2012 10:55 a.m.

I see what you did there.
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slimjim441 - March 16, 2012 12:30 p.m.

...well played. >.>
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ObliqueZombie - March 18, 2012 9:08 p.m.

Hey, Deus Ex had an en--oh. Wait.
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ObliqueZombie - March 16, 2012 10:46 a.m.

The Fight Club ending: Shepard was fighting an imaginary enemy, but every played along because they felt bad. He then shoots himself in the head and everything turns back to normal--before the Credit Card building are destroyed.
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Corsair89 - March 16, 2012 10:31 a.m.

Final Fantasy X ending: Shepard was actually the dream of the thousands of dead Protheons. Turns out that the Reapers are his father, who is also a dream. He became the Reapers after being summoned to destroy the previous Reapers in an endless cycle of destruction. Garrus has been dead this whole time too. Liara starts singing J-Pop.
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MattK - March 16, 2012 10:07 a.m.

King's Quest 6 Ending Everything leads up to a generally satisfying and conclusive ending, with Shepherd accomplishing his/her goal and the villains are defeated, but there are a lot of signficant variations on the ending that are dictated by the players action throughout the entire story: characters may live or die, items can be won or lost forever, and the story can even take a signficant detour depending on the choices you make. Different playthroughs can result in different endings (some happier/sadder than others) and significant changes in the game's story, and the player feels satisfied with the experience from beginning to end. ...wait a minute.
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Grif - March 16, 2012 9:25 a.m.

This is the ridiculous nonsense that I come to GamesRadar for. Keep it coming Matt! I really enjoyed the Lord of the Flies ending
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Hobogonigal - March 16, 2012 9:14 a.m.

I haven't seen the ending of Mass Effect 3 yet but I'm going to be disappointed that none of these endings will conclude the trilogy. All I had to do was look at the picture of the article on the main page to tell this article was a Cundy article. Hilarious work!
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Rowdie - March 16, 2012 8:59 a.m.

Complainers dismissed. AI ending: Flash forward unmeasurable amount of time. Synthetic life resurrects Shepard (again) but can only keep her alive for a handful of minutes. Explains that they have won and when she breaths her last breath it will be the last organic life ever takes, but it's not all bad 'cause the synthetics live in peace.
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db1331 - March 16, 2012 8:24 a.m.

The Village ending: It is revealed that the galaxy is actually one big wildlife reserve, and the reapers are just giant park rangers trying to keep the populations in check.
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ObliqueZombie - March 16, 2012 10:45 a.m.

He already did that one, didn't he?
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db1331 - March 16, 2012 10:54 a.m.

LOL. I stopped at the one right before it. Color me retarded. HOW DO I INTERNET? /great minds
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james-isaac-swarts - March 16, 2012 6:54 a.m.

Any change to the ending would be a cop out. Unless you can tell me how anything you do in all the mass effect games could change the blue prints for an ancient alien device, that was there on mars before the events of the entire series. The possible choices you have at the end are the choices you always had.
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P0ck3tC1am - March 16, 2012 6:44 a.m.

Timesplitters FP Ending: Shepard uses the Time Crystals to call upon the power of all the other Shepards across time instead of going across the galaxy. So now there's a massive army of Shepards to defeat the Reapers. The password is banana's De Ja Vue ending: Shepard uses the machine to go back in the past to tell the past Shepard that he needs to start neow....saving you all the trouble for nothing. :D Green Lanturn ending: He uses the ring to summon a bagillion jets, to push the reapers in the sun. The best....Birdemic: Shock and Terror: The Eagle/Hawks all dive bomb into the Reapers, then the Doves drive the Reapers away.
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ShortFuse - March 16, 2012 6:15 a.m.

Terminator 2 ending: Shep reveals he himself is a reaper and for some reason can't kill himself so decides to get dropped in conveniently placed lava instead by his team...thumbs up follows, people cry. Saves world from killer future robots. Mulholland Drive ending: WHAT I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHAT THE BLOODY HELL JUST HAPPENED.
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inkyspot - March 16, 2012 6:32 a.m.

They indoctrinated us. DLC ending is coming, before you actually take the trip. hence, nothing saves after after you leave the ship to Earth. Bioware planned this... Your question has the answer. DLC coming.
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inkyspot - March 16, 2012 6:12 a.m.

I hope the Porno Ass Effect 3 has a better ending than the game. Joking aside... I believe they planned all this out and a real ending is coming.
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bilstar - March 16, 2012 5:58 a.m.

Haaa. Brill! Ummmm... Pulp Fiction Ending. Shepherd gets shot on the toilet halfway through, but that doesn't matter because at the end, they stop the Reapers and honeybunny from robbing the Citadel cafe with a wallet that says "bad motherf*****" *cool music plays*
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