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Mario on your Xbox 360!

When the New Xbox Live Experience first launched last November, we were excited to queue up our Netflix accounts with our favorite shows and movies. But lately we’ve been begging and praying for something good to be available in Netflix’s “Watch Instantly” tab, because we’ve finished every episode of 30 Rock and seen Super High Me once (you only need to see it once).

Since we may not be able to stream The Dark Knight anytime soon, we can fill the void by filling our Instant Queues with The Legend of Zelda animated series and, uh, a collection of Uwe Boll movies. And yeah, they're not necessarily Oscar or Emmy-grade material. But they are videogame-related, and most of 'em are so eye-meltingly awful that you've just got to see them.

Nintendo on your Xbox 360

The show: Super Mario Bros. Super Show!: Mario of the Deep (1989)
Why you should queue it up: If only we could expel 8-bit sounds every time we jumped in the air or hear the entire original NES Super Mario Bros. soundtrack through our daily walks of life. If that isn’t enough for you, maybe the cheesy rap intro is.

The show: The Legend of Zelda: The Complete Animated Series (1989)
Why you should queue it up: Well excuuuuuse me, Princess. We had no idea Link was such a douchey, adolescent punk. Excuuuuuuuuse us, but we wouldn’t trust this kid with our girlfriends, let alone trust him to guard the Triforce. See for yourself.

The show: Captain N: The Game Master: Adventures in Videoland (1989)
Why you should queue it up: First of all, this kid Kevin gets sucked into a TV with his dog and finds himself trapped in Videoland. Somehow, it doesn’t seem to faze him that he’s turned into a cartoon. What’s more upsetting is it doesn’t seem to faze him that the artist’s renditions of Simon Belmont, Kid Icarus, and Mega Man are absolutely horrible.


Above: That’s right, we said it 

See Street Fighter get naked on the next page.

19 comments

  • CandiedJester - January 10, 2009 5:07 a.m.

    Why isn't link wearing pants? O____O;
  • iluvmyDS - January 9, 2009 8:03 p.m.

    And since when is Simon Belmont the character from Pitfall?
  • FierceDeity - January 9, 2009 11:32 a.m.

    man the zelda and sonic cartoons sucked ass i remember enjoying the mario and dk shows though the new kirby toon aint too bad either lol and "STOP PLAYING DK AND WIPE MY ASS" was epic
  • mcdukefan823 - January 9, 2009 4:43 a.m.

    i remember the dk animated show haha wow that was a long time ago
  • John-117 - January 9, 2009 3:37 a.m.

    I have sadly already watched Transmorphers from beginning to end and can honestly say it has taken years off of my life.
  • RebornKusabi - January 8, 2009 11:57 p.m.

    Street Fighter II: The Animated Movie is seriously the best video game movie out there right now and you woud be mentally re****ed if you didn't watch it! The soundtrack was awesome and yes it was nice to see Chun-Li naked/half-naked and then see the shit kicked out of her by Vega/Balrog (Cammy fan ftw).
  • Hunter2458 - January 8, 2009 10:59 p.m.

    All I wanted from that Transmorphers video was a wardrobe malfunction.
  • King Rupert6 - January 12, 2009 3:16 a.m.

    oh my god.... transmorphers kinda makes me puke everywhere... i think i'd rather watch a bad Uwe Boll movie than that... =|
  • bearshakems46 - January 11, 2009 5:11 a.m.

    i couldnt stop laughing at the learning section
  • iluvmyDS - January 9, 2009 7:59 p.m.

    Is Transmorphers a porno? It has the same shitty acting and terrible lighting as one. Also, WTF @ Uwe Boll for killing children.
  • J-spit - January 9, 2009 7:53 p.m.

    Transmorphers 2: The Gruntfest Continues! seriously, there was a lot of grunting going on!
  • Ravenbom - January 9, 2009 6:30 p.m.

    lol, the funniest of the Mario cartoons is when the Princess wants to go see Milli Vanilli... Non video game related tangent: I really wish they would add Jayce and the Wheeled Warriors to the instant queue. It was one of the best 80's cartoons.
  • 435 - January 9, 2009 4:13 p.m.

    After the first half hour, Postal was actually enjoyable. Just have to get past Dave Foley's full-frontal and the shotgun scene. o__o
  • Dark_Salvation - January 9, 2009 2:52 p.m.

    why would you wanna watch shows like these when there is way better things to do? like play CoD5 or...whatever it is you do >.>
  • skyguy343 - January 9, 2009 3:25 a.m.

    could someone just tell me they remember the donkey kong animated series. i just need to know im not the only one
  • Yellowhat17 - January 9, 2009 3:21 a.m.

    @Reborn Chun Li...hmmm.... anyways, first off, retarded isn't a curse word, second off, I'm mentally retarded for not seeing it? Calm down, fanboy. oh, and I'm gonna go ahead and do what Golden Me did now.
  • Lavek26 - January 9, 2009 12:24 a.m.

    the first Uwe Bowel movie was kinda funny how they seemed only to shoot the kids
  • GoldenMe - January 9, 2009 12:19 a.m.

    @REborn- O_o *Quickly backs out of page*
  • chrisat928 - January 8, 2009 10:27 p.m.

    I remember watching the Legend of Zelda cartoon, and it making me not want to play the game. Fortunately, I got over it. I did love the Mario Bros SuperShow, though. Captian N was awesome.

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