So, the much-vaunted PlayStation Home has been with us a few weeks now. It's still a bit dull though, isn't it? Once you've made your avatar, rearranged your furniture and spent a little while evading the inevitable deluge of "A/S/L/?" demands in the plaza, there's actually remarkably little to do. So we've decided to step in and shake up the fun with some patented GamesRadar F***ing About (tm). Try these for size.
Yes, it's childish. Yes, it's puerile. Yes, in an environment filled with PS3 fans it's like shooting large fish in a thimble-sized barrel using hand grenades. But remember, you're being ironic, so it's okay. See how long you can ignite the flames for with the bare minimum input. We've managed about 5 minutes with only a single sentence.
Use Home's clipping issues to make a case for boob molestation. Using a female avatar, find another Homer scrolling through their options in the PDA, then just back into them, through their arms, to create a 'special' kind of hug. You know, the illegal, now-you-have-to-sign-a-register kind.
If conversation gets a bit predictable (and it will), spice things up with some good old fashioned crazy talk. We find that it's easy to reel in a curious Homer by standing facing a corner, Blair Witch-style. Once the concerned party makes contact, start with the asylum-speak. Sporadically spinning around on the spot completes the effect beautifully.
Given the disproportionate gender balance in Sony's HD sausage fest, a female avatar will guarantee you mass attention within seconds. The best way to use that power? Punish people for being so damn shallow. Start dancing, attract some flirtatious male attention, then suddenly switch to another avatar save slot, preferably one containing a big fat ugly man-creature. They'll regret the lack of a sprint button immediately.
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