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Gamera
What Is It? A giant turtle thing. Created by a rival studio to head up an alternative to the Godzilla franchise. But he’s a good guy, so, politics permitting, a team-up with Godzilla could work - as long as the film’s villain monster doesn’t live in a lettuce patch.
Origin: Slept under Arctic ice until an atomic blast woke him up.
Powers: Flying, breathing fire, walking upright, eating really slowly, falling off the edge of tables.
Who Should Do The Voice-Over If It Speaks Or Roars? Christian Bale.
Mothra
What Is It? A giant woman moth thing. Usually accompanied by two little fairy butterflies who do the talking for her. Genuinely popular with Japanese girls.
Origin: A big blue egg from, it would seem, space.
Powers: Emits poisonous dust, shoots laser rays from antennae, zaps lightning bolts from wings, telepathic. Can’t throw a ball to save its life, though.
Who Should Do The Voice-Over If It Speaks Or Roars? Dakota Fanning.
Rodan
What Is It? A giant green pterodactyl thing. Looks worryingly chicken-like from some angles.
Origin: Unearthed by an ill-advised mining operation - along with a swarm of prehistoric, people-eating insects.
Powers: It can create hurricane-force winds and blast out destructive sonic booms. Also, flies really fast, weighs 16,000 tons, tears up buildings with titanic talons and is forced to bob its head backwards and forwards as it walks for some reason.
Who Should Do The Voice-Over If It Speaks Or Roars? Ray Liotta.
King Ghidorah
What Is It? A giant dragon thing. With three heads.
Origin: Space. Controlled by evil beings from Planet X, just outside Jupiter.
Powers: Breathing fire, flying really fast, making hurricane winds come out of his wings, really annoying high-pitched squawking.
Who Should Do The Voice-Over If It Speaks Or Roars? Anne Hathaway.
King Ghidorah
What Is It? A giant dragon thing. With three heads.
Origin: Space. Controlled by evil beings from Planet X, just outside Jupiter.
Powers: Breathing fire, flying really fast, making hurricane winds come out of his wings, really annoying high-pitched squawking.
Who Should Do The Voice-Over If It Speaks Or Roars? Anne Hathaway.
Gigan
What Is It? A giant spiky monster thing. Not really something you would care to meet down a dark alley. Unless you're blind.
Origin: He's a mate of King Ghidorah's. Both of them took the trip from space to Earth together, possibly sharing the driving and popping sweets into each other's mouths.
Powers: He's got enormous great metal hooks instead of hands which, should frantic stabbing prove ineffective, he can also use to shoot out explosive charges at your face.
Who Should Do The Voice-Over If It Speaks Or Roars? Seth Rogen.
Hedorah
What Is It? Jesus, we don’t know. It’s supposed to be an evolved tadpole (from space). But it’s more like a child’s plasticine model that’s been left alone in a daycare centre during a summer heatwave, mocked by spiteful Ben 10 action figures and forced to remain still and stoical as sun-sheltering house spiders scuttle across its forehead.
Origin: A pond in space.
Powers: According to some frightening fansite we’ve found, Hedorah is Godzilla’s most powerful adversary. It can squirt CHUNKS OF ITS OWN ACIDIC BODY at opponents, as well as firing a laser gun from out of its eye.
Who Should Do The Voice-Over If It Speaks Or Roars? Carey Mulligan.
King Kong
What Is It? A giant ape thing. Obviously.
Origin: Prehistoric gorilla who, according to Godzilla lore, loped across a land bridge from Asia to Skull Island where he lived like a lord and ate women.
Powers: Grunting, roaring, chest-beating, ice-skating.
Who Should Do The Voice-Over If It Speaks Or Roars? Colin Firth.
Varan
What Is It? A giant flying squirrel thing with horns on its back.
Origin: He’s the 'mountain god' of an understandably compliant village. Annoyed by a nearby scientific study of butterflies (really) he emerges from his mountain lair and attacks Tokyo. Pre-Godzilla, he’s eventually destroyed by bombs containing “special gunpowder” (really again).
Powers: Membranes under his arms let him leap and glide around disturbingly. He can also level buildings with a swish of his tail and, in some incarnations, fire a ball of energy out of his mouth. Godzilla then bats it back at him. Astonishingly, this dual monster weapon interplay was responsible for table-tennis being big in Japan in the ‘50s.
Who Should Do The Voice-Over If It Speaks Or Roars? Morgan Freeman.
Manda
What Is It? A giant snake thing. Or possibly a dragon with a long neck... Sorry. Godzilla.com doesn’t really make it clear.
Origin: He was a dragon (ah!) who lived in the sea and attacked warships which fought him off with electric shocks and he tried to swim away but he was shot by a powerful freezing cannon and aliens came down and took control of Manda and made him attack humans until humans freed him from alien mind control and made him attack them back.
Powers: Crushing with his body, fast swimming, breathing underwater, strategic hissing.
Who Should Do The Voice-Over If It Speaks Or Roars? Brenda Blethyn.
Mechagodzilla
What Is It? Godzilla, only in robot form.
Origin: The ‘mecha’ layer was a disguise conceived by sneaky ape-like aliens who planned to fool people into thinking he was the real Godzilla. But the real Godzilla breathed on him and burned off the ‘pseudo-flesh’, thus exposing the ruse. He then had to go back to space for repairs (really, really).
Powers: Shoots a laser from his mouth and missiles from his fingers. Cool!
Who Should Do The Voice-Over If It Speaks Or Roars? Anthony Hopkins.
Space Godzilla
What Is It? Godzilla, only from space. It’s a modified, outrageously pimped super-Godzilla clone, carefully designed to be toy-friendly.
Origin: It came from a 'white hole' with plans to take over Earth by defeating Proper Godzilla. Guess how that goes...
Powers: Energy beam from mouth, telekinesis, EMP wave... Has also been known to pat his head and rub his tummy at the same time.
Who Should Do The Voice-Over If It Speaks Or Roars? Ryan Gosling.
Jean Reno
What Is It? A huge, secret-service monster thing, hell-bent on killing Godzilla and, in order to prop up Roland Emmerich's idea of Frenchness (even though he's Belgian) getting a “decent cup of coffee” and a quality croissant.
Origin: Belgium, not France.
Powers: Scowling, baritone grunting, abysmal Elvis impersonating, avoiding being in a decent film since Ronin .
Who Should Do The Voice-Over If It Speaks Or Roars? Golden Voice Homeless Guy.
