You. Your friends and family. Your classmates and coworkers. In the brave new world of the internet, everybody has power. Information is interactive, knowledge is collaborative and history is open source. The nerdy kid next door has just as much influence as a high school teacher; the dorky dude at the comic book shop has just as much voice as a college professor.
Problem is, the nerds and dorks tend to have a lot more free time - and passion - than the teachers and professors. The end result? A hilariously skewed, terrifyingly twisted view of the world in which all the wrong things are deemed "important" and worthy of serious academic discussion.
Here are 15 mind-boggling examples.
See what we mean? When thedeadliest, costliest war (opens in new tab)in the history of mankind has been trumped bya videogame franchise (opens in new tab)about that war, you know something's off. One involved over 50 countries and took over 70 million lives; the other involves button mashing and tea bagging.
On an encouraging note, we did have to add all the Call of Duty games' individual pages together to reach the crazy number above. On a discouraging note, we didn't have to add Call of Duty 4 and its non-WWII setting, which would have brought the total word count to an even crazier 18,927.
Oh, and on a simply ridiculous note?Call of Duty 4: Modern Warfare (opens in new tab)beats "modern warfare (opens in new tab)"... 5,858 to 2,873.
Alsoless important than Call of Duty!
•American Revolutionary War (opens in new tab)= 8,078
•American Civil War (opens in new tab)= 11,729
•English Civil War (opens in new tab)= 8,030
•Napoleonic Wars (opens in new tab)= 7,951
•Hundred Years' War (opens in new tab)= 7,992
•War on Terrorism (opens in new tab)= 10,674
•War on Drugs (opens in new tab)= 7,628
•Cold War (opens in new tab)= 10,117
•"War (opens in new tab)" = 9,233
While the magic menagerie of super-powered, frilly-maned, sparkly-eyed, rosy-cheeked wonder beasts might make for slightly more exciting cards than a Three of Spades, the emphasis here is still extremely wonky.
Poker (opens in new tab)has been around for longer than anyone can remember... thePokemon Trading Card Game (opens in new tab)was invented in 1996. Poker has created millionaires and forced bankruptcy... the Pokemon Trading Card Game might have resulted in some lost lunch money and a temper tantrum or two.
Alsoless important than Pokemon Trading Cards!
•Baseball cards (opens in new tab)= 4,686
•Blackjack (opens in new tab)= 5,228
•Roulette (opens in new tab)= 5,492
•Checkers (opens in new tab)= 2,326
•Pool (Billiards) (opens in new tab)= 621
•Bowling (opens in new tab)= 407
•Wheel of Fortune (opens in new tab)= 4,521
•"Trade (opens in new tab)" = 3,038
•"Games (opens in new tab)" = 2,830
Before you get the wrong impression, no, theMaster Chief (opens in new tab)does not win in a Wikipedia matchup againstGeorge W. Bush (opens in new tab)... though his approval ratings are undoubtedly higher.
The truly astounding thing, however, is that he does emerge victorious against not one, not two, but TEN of this country's past commanders in chief. Yes, 23% of the men who helped make the United States the strongest nation on Earth are easily defeated by a fictional and faceless videogame character who barely knows how to speak and takes orders from a naked hologram. Go America!
The orange word count above is an average taken fromthe US Presidents beaten by the Master Chief. Here's the full, pathetic breakdown:
Leaders of the Free Worldless important than Master Chief!
•James Monroe (opens in new tab)= 2,820
(5th President)
•John Quincy Adams (opens in new tab)= 3,457
(6th President)
•John Tyler (opens in new tab)= 3,431
(10th President)
•Zachary Taylor (opens in new tab)= 2,235
(12th President)
•Millard Fillmore (opens in new tab)= 3,631
(13th President)
•Franklin Pierce (opens in new tab)= 4,203
(14th President)
•James Buchanan (opens in new tab)= 3,888
(15th President)
•Rutherford B. Hayes (opens in new tab)= 2,686
(19th President)
•James A. Garfield (opens in new tab)= 3,915
(20th President)
•Chester A. Arthur (opens in new tab)= 3,078
(21st President)
