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The Top 7... Lazy Character Clichés

Description: Hmm. Perhaps we judged the whole helmet thing too quickly. If these are the mind-numbingly monotonous faces of the future, we'd rather they remained hidden. Soldiers, engineers, prisoners, Jedi, whatever - if they live amidst the stars, they share the exact same, dull appearance. The lack of gravity tends to remove all trace of individuality as well, ostensibly so players can fill in their own personality. Have fun doing the developers' jobs for them!

Common characteristics:

  • Buzz or crew cut to keep troublesome hair out of the way of important space business.
  • Strong hairline, however, reminds us that these guys could totally grow a full head if they wanted to.
  • Liberal sprinkling of uber macho stubble.
  • Perfectly proportioned square of a skull with chiseled cheek bones and epic jaw.
  • Military garb recognizable despite completely different century and/or universe.
  • Cigars and Castro caps mandatory for all high-ranking officers.
  • Blank mannequin expression. No smiles allowed.

Possible Inspiration:

Wait a second...

The Antidote:

We thought about including Duke Nukem in the collage above, but c'mon - look at the guy! That blood red tank top. That curled snarl. That impenetrable wedge of neon blonde tresses. That pair of unapologetically 1980s sunglasses. Duke Nukem may be a Buzz Cut Space Dude, but he's a buzz cut space dude with some serious flavor.

I enjoy sunshine, the company of kittens and turning frowns upside down. I am also a fan of sarcasm. Let's be friends!