The Evolution Of Brad Pitt

The Film: The cult favourite and first female/female road movie of its kind, T&L sees Susan Sarandon and Geena Davis embark upon a 2-day fishing trip which takes a catastrophic turn and becomes a veritable crime spree as the two women try to escape the law.

The Role: Brad plays JD in what could be considered as his big break into Hollywood. JD’s a robber on parole who (dutifully) assists with Thelma’s sexual awakening.

Jolly nice of him.

You also get to see his botty. It’s a lovely botty.

The Film: Johnny Suede tells the story of a rock-star wannabe, who believes that his life will be complete if he acquires a pair of black suede shoes (which is only partly true.)

Timothy Hutton was the producer’s favourite for the role of Johnny, though director Tom DiCillo insisted that Brad Pitt was the man for the part.

The Role: The character of Johnny Suede was inspired by the resurgence of rockabilly in the mid ’80s.

Pitt sports an impressively inched Pompadour hairdo, which makes him look uncannily like Johnny Bravo. Coincidence?!

The Film: A bit like Who Framed Roger Rabbit but not half as good, Cool World is a live-action/animated hybrid which darts between the ‘real’ world and the animated world, where humans are called ‘noids’ and cartoons are called ‘doodles’.

The Role: Pitt plays a WWII GI who finds himself in the animated world somehow after his mother is killed in a motorcycle accident.

It doesn’t make an awful lot of sense and is pretty terrible, actually.

Don’t lose sleep about dying before you get to see it.

The Film: True Romance involves violence, drugs, and above all, love - which manages to flourish in spite of all the ghastliness going on.

It is truly romantic, though in a druggy/gunny/Tarantino way.

The Role: Pitt is astounding as naïve stoner Floyd, whose primary character function appears to be to provide the bad guys with enough information to keep the plot flowing.

His secondary function is comedy, although it’s the type of comedy which almost steals the movie.

The Film: IWTV is all about Louis, a vampire, who’s been in his 20s since the 1790s. In an interview with reporter Daniel Malloy (Christian Slater), Louis recounts the story of his (after-) life. All 200 years of it.

The Role: Unfortunately, Louis doesn’t take too well to being a vampire. He feels a bit rotten about drinking human blood so tries to survive on animal blood.

He's a sort of vampire vegetarian. With poodles as vampire vegetables.

If they were vegetables, they’d probably be cauliflowers. Poor old Louis. Cauliflower’s horrible.

The Film: David Fincher's Se7en follows two detectives on the hunt for a man who can only be described as a sick freak.

Sick Freak’s murders have been inspired by the seven deadly sins. The killings are elaborate, horrific and exquisitely calculated.

The Role: Pitt is John Mills, a feisty young detective. His character isn't particularly innovative, but it’s Mills’ relationship with Freeman’s Somerset which really makes the screen fizz.

The Film: Borrowing many influences from the 1962 short film La Jetée , 12 Monkeys is a science fiction film which deals with the concepts of time travel, conspiracy and mental wellbeing.

It’s a gripping thriller, and although director Terry Gilliam was on a tight budget, it looks fancier than most blockbusters.

The Role: Brad plays Jeffrey Goines, a virus expert who’s being detained in a psychiatric hospital.

Pitt’s performance was noteworthy enough to get him an Academy Award nomination for Best Supporting Actor.

The Film: SYIT was a book written by Heinrich Harrer, an Austrian mountaineer. It's based on his memoirs which document his time spent in Tibet in the 1940s.

It’s also a cracking song by David Bowie. They don’t mention that in the film though.

The Role: Exhibiting a questionable Austrian accent , Brad Pitt played the role of Harrer.

Because of the subject matter covered in the film (it features the young Dalai Lama and explores China’s invasion of Tibet) Pitt has been banned from entering China. Like, forever.

The Film: Anthony Hopkins is really rich. He has a daughter who is really beautiful. Death arrives to claim Hopkins, but before that, he decides that he wants to know more about the world. In exchange for a little bit longer on Earth, he asks Hopkins to show him around a bit.

Along the way, Death learns something about the joys of mortality (including the wonders of peanut butter).

The Role: Pitt is the Angel of Death/Joe Black. He fancies Hopkins’ daughter, though realises that it’s not him that she loves, it’s the man whose body he’s stolen. So he goes back to…wherever he came from. Hell? Is it Hell? It’s probably Hell.

The Film: The First Rule of Fight Club is...

OK, let's talk about Fight Club.

Fincher's adaptation of Palahniuk's novel is about more than violence.

It touches upon materialisation, globalisation, and the demasculinization of the American man. That's a lot of -ations.

The Role: Pitt's Tyler Durden is wreckless, violent and unpredictable. He's also everything Edward Norton's narrator aspires to be...

The Film: One of Guy Richie’s roly poly cockney frolics, Snatch had a fantastic ensemble cast of actors jostling about in crime-ridden Laaandon and showcasing their accents with varying degrees of accuracy.

The Role: In an unexpected though utterly wonderful turn, Brad Pitt plays Oirish Pikey Mickey, the whizzkid bare-knuckle fighter with a formidable punch.

He’s nimble-footed, wily and cunning, and almost completely incomprehensible.

He says “ma” a lot. We think.

The Film: A misleading advertising campaign portrayed The Mexican as a generic romantic road movie, all slushy on-screen pukey love stuff between Brad Pitt and Julia Roberts.

In essence, Pitt and Roberts don’t actually share that much screen time, and it’s more of a thriller really; "The Mexican" is actually the name of a gun.

The Role: Pitt plays Jerry, Julia Roberts’ husband, who has to get his hands on said "Mexican".

Incidentally, Julia Roberts met her husband, Daniel Moder, during the making of The Mexican . Moder was a cameraman on set. They now have babies. How lovely.

The Film: Ocean’s Eleven was a remake of the ‘60s Rat-Pack classic. It’s about Danny Ocean (George Clooney) and a band of crazy ragamuffins who bally together for a massive casino heist.

It was followed by a couple more heist films – all massive takers at the box office, naturally, thanks to the Clooney/Pitt dream pairing. Cue fruit machine: $$$.

The Role: Pitt’s Rusty appears to have an insatiable appetite – he’s eating something almost every time he’s on screen.

The Film: Loosely based on Homer’s Iliad, Troy was a massive release for Warner Brothers, earning them a tidy $497,409,852 at the box office.

It’s loosely based on Homer’s Iliad, and has all the exciting bits – wooden horses, lovely-faced Helens and lots and lots of boats.

The Role: Brad got massive for the part of Achilles. He also got a little bit too into character when he tore his left Achilles tendon.

The Film: Mr. & Mrs. Smith are a married couple who are both skilled assassins. This is a secret that each spouse keeps from the other. When they’re hired to kill one another, loads of crazy shit goes down.

The film is worth a watch if only so that you can bear witness to Brangelina’s electric on-screen chemistry. It’s really rather saucy.

The Role: John Smith is stuck in a boring marriage, and it seems as if being hired to kill his wife and dodging her bullets is the best thing that’s ever happened to their relationship. Who needs marriage counselling?

The Film: A multi-stranded plotline begins when an American woman is shot in a freak accident on a bus in Morocco. The narrative unfolds to reveal how the the fates convened and the planets aligned to make it so.

The Role: Pitt plays Richard Jones, husband of Cate Blanchett’s (injured) Susan Jones.

It was quite a serious turn for Pitt after Mr. & Mrs. Smith , and he certainly doesn’t look as slick in that shabby beard.

Still fit, though.

The Film: The lengthy title gives away nothing of the film’s stunning visuals and complex characterisation. It’s a feast for the mind, as well as the eyes.

The Role: Pitt is the eponymous hero (James), and gives one of his best performances to date. He’s a troubled soul, as keenly aware of his short future as he is of his weighty past.

The assassination scene is deeply sad – if only because the audience is moved to sympathise with both characters equally. Thoughtful stuff.

The Film: After the astonishingly grim and downright astonishing No Country For Old Men , Burn After Reading must have provided a little light relief for the Coen brothers.

It’s a comedy thriller, featuring security breaches, blackmail and CIA stuff.

The Role: Chad Feldheimer is a gym employee who comes into possession of a CD containing what he believes to be classified CIA information.

Using the disc in a blackmail attempt, Chad punches wildly above his weight, and gets punched in the face.

The Film: The make-up team did a pretty good job at making Pitt look super old, and did just as well turning him into a late-teens-early-twenties stud.

It seems they struggled a bit towards the end though, and had to get an actual baby to replace him. That’s cheating!

The Role: Pitt received an Academy Award nomination for his portrayal of Benjamin, and the film was hailed as this generation’s Forrest Gump .

Which is supposed to be a compliment, in case you were wondering.