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Bristling Thatcher's-England drama Awaydays brings memories of terrace troubles and football casuals to the screen this week.
It follows Merseyside lad Carty as he's swept up in organised hooliganism, and features another nasty turn from act Brit thesp Stephen Graham as an ultraviolent, tea-swigging gang leader.
Thug life: A spitting, raging, hair-trigger psycho who intimidates his friends and stares down the world with speed-boggled eyes. A monster of fury and violence.
Nastiest moment: Senselessly throwing a thick pint glass from the first floor of a packed pub.
Quote: “Armed robbery? With a replica? I mean, how the fuck can it be an armed robbery with a replica?”
Who he’d support: Edinburgh-based Hibs, though he’d only turn up for the derby against Hearts and only then for the chance to glass some poor fella who caught his glance for more than a half-second.
Probably some poor fella who also supported Hibs.
Next: Big Chris, Lock, Stock And Two Smoking Barrels [page-break]
Big Chris , Lock, Stock And Two Smoking Barrels (1998)
Thug life: Imposing debt collector loyal to porn baron 'Hatchet' Harry Lonsdale. Chris is full of flashpoint violence but he's mildy spoken, he doesn’t curse, and he does his nut when someone else says bad words around his young son.
Nastiest moment: Smashing the skull of two-bit mug-dog into a puree using a car door.
Quote: “It’s been emotional...”
Who he’d support: AFC Wimbledon, in honour of the the team ‘actor’ Vinnie Jones played for before turning to ‘acting’.
Next: Bob Craven, Red Riding Trilogy [page-break]
Inspector Bob Craven , Red Riding Trilogy (2008)
Thug life: Scheming rat-faced bent copper from the delirious Red Riding Trilogy (to be shown in US cinemas later this year). Craven is proper filth who tortures suspects and obstructs investigations that might implicate local power figures.
Nastiest moment: Cracking the hands of a falsely imprisoned journalist with the rim of his handcuffs.
Quote: (When asked if he has a hobby) “Chewing minge!”
Who he’d support: Leeds, of course.
Next: The Mechanic, Raiders Of The Lost Ark [page-break]
The German Mechanic, Raiders Of The Lost Ark (1981)
Thug life: The anonymous big, bruising Luftwaffe grease monkey who boxes Indy to within a few inches of his life, before he’s sucker-punched by whirring propeller blades.
Nastiest moment: That godawful arrogant smirk when he knocks Indy clean off his feet.
Quote: He never says a word, just grunts and gestures for Jones to fight.
Who he’d support: Bayern Munich, because those Nazis were always big glory-hunters.
Next: Combo, This Is England [page-break]
Combo , This Is England (2007)
Thug life: Older, meaner, menacing skinhead who comes home from prison seething with hatred and prejudice. A volatile mix of fury, ignorance and insecurity.
Nastiest moment: The frantic, senseless beating given to black skinhead Milky.
Quote: “That's what this nation has been built on, proud men. Proud warriors! Two thousand years this little tiny island has been raped and pillaged, by people who have come here and wanted a piece of it.”
Who he’d support: Derby County – in the film’s ‘80s time-frame they were still living off Clough’s glory years a decade earlier. And of course, they play in white.
Next: Ray, Nil By Mouth [page-break]
Ray , Nil By Mouth (1997)
Thug life: Small time crook, wifebeating drunk and utter, utter bastard.
Ray looms large in the council estates and sleazy clubs of South East London, but underneath he’s an emotional shell with daddy issues.
Nastiest moment: Biting through the nose of timid, thieving idiot Billy.
Quote: “I'll come back and I'll do you, you c***! F***ing mug. I'll get a f***ing gun. Give me a f***ing gun. Someone give me a gun. I'll kill her. I'll kill that c***!!!” (continues)
Who he’d support: As a proper East End boy it’d have to be West Ham (also the team supported by Ray actor Ray Winstone).
Next: Harry Waters, In Bruges [page-break]
Harry Waters , In Bruges (2008)
Thug life: Meticulous London underworld boss who’s raised himself to tedious upper middle-class respectability.
Harry’s guided by a stringent code of ethics – he’ll murder on a whim, but takes his own life when he thinks he’s offed a kid.
Nastiest moment: Hunting down Colin Farrell's naïve, loveable hitman Ray through the cobbled streets of Bruges.
Quote: “An Uzi? I'm not from South Central Los Angeles. I didn't come here to shoot twenty black ten-year-olds in a drive-by. I want a normal gun for a normal person.”
Who he’d support: Chelsea – tacky nouveau riche pretenders with no class.
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