I know what the "science" says, but it's my right to believe that babies come from cotton candy tufts of stardust and dust bunnies like Cogimyun, the wheat flour fairy Hello Kitty Island Adventure will add to its cozy life sim in the upcoming Wheatflour Wonderland DLC.
In a montage included during July's Nintendo Direct Partner Showcase, developer Sunblink and cutie factory Sanrio revealed the DLC and its quickly approaching release date, September 18.
The expansion will be $15 on Nintendo Switch, Steam, and PS5 – once Hello Kitty Island Adventure is ported to the console on August 5 – and free to download on Apple Arcade. Just be sure to gulp down an allergy medication or something to minimize your bleary-eyed sniffling and sobbing at Cogimyun's marvelous sweetness first, as I will undoubtedly have to. One sneeze, and you'll blow the baby away, way past the Andromeda galaxy.
Cogimyun is a dummy, clinically fragile ball of puff. She's in nursery school, and she aspires to become an onigiri rice ball because she doesn't know what it is.
While I am proud to say that I have, in fact, graduated from my nursery school and even from college, I still love Cogimyun as one of the most underrated Sanrio characters, because – though she's never enjoyed the popularity of the omnipotent Hello Kitty – I feel that she understands me more than the rest of them.
I, too, think of myself as breakable. Cogimyun wears braids of golden wheat like garlands around her lamblike face, and I like to think that I can also rock a pair of braids every now and then. So do many other girls, which is why the news of Cogimyun's Island Adventure DLC must feel the same as when Homo erectus first discovered fire. That's how much impact it has on the human race.
"When Kuromi and My Melody spill a magical potion on a bunch of flour in Hello Kitty's cafe," says a press release, "they open a secret portal to Wheatflour Wonderland, a whimsical world of waving grain, bright stained-glass castles, mysterious ruins and more than a little magic. Suddenly, Cogimyun appears with an urgent request: restore the Wheatflour Guardians and unlock the Ancient Citadel, where a great treasure resides!"
"Reminder that Cogimyun is the Sanrio mascot who's so fragile she would fall apart at lightest touches… or when she's crying too much," says a popular YouTube comment.
"Peak has returned," agrees another comment.
"This is going to be a great DLC," says another reply translated from Spanish by GamesRadar+ with assistance from Google. "It's going to be GOTY, and it's going to tear Expedition 33 to pieces."
You know how it goes, "Remember you are dust, and to dust you shall return." We could all wash away in an instant, so we must use the moments in between to reflect on our innate innocence, gentleness, frailty. Everything's coming up Cogimyun.
