Bruno's Movie Top Ten

"I know it’s controversial to like zis film, but it’s important to show zat not all gay guys are positive role models like me, but zat ze Harvey Milks of ze vorld are out zere, giving us all a bad name."

"How sexy is Vin Diesel in zis movie!?? I watched it mit 500 guys in a theater in Salzburg – ze title vas ze perfect metaphor for vhat vas going on during ze screening, as vas ze massive explosion at ze end of ze film."

"One of the most important documentaries about Africa ever made.

Obviously, some licence has been taken mit ze animals – Lions Speaking English!? Come on, zat’s ridiculous – everyone knows zey speak African."

"Zis film inspired me to make Bruno – it showed that there was a market for documentaries about super-hot gay white guys."

"Zis film has had a deeply profound affect on me – to this day, I still fantasize almost nightly about being on that boat with those guys.

In fact, zis summer, I even went sailing of the cost of Africa in the hope I’d be picked by Somali pirates und it vould be a similar experience."

"I’m not really sure vhat zis is about, but Gandhi is clearly an inspirational figure to Western guys, whose biggest achievement was to make it acceptable for us to wear sarongs und be manorexic."

"Zis to me is ze ultimate feel good movie. It makes me feel good to see Vince Vaughn looking gouty und bloated und being given terrible scripts."

"Leo has never been so adorable – by the end of ze film, I vas even stiffer zan he vas!

Just a shame he had Winslet following him around for 4 hours of each day zat she vasn’t at ze 1st Class buffet. I’m surprised ze ship didn’t sink when she climbed up to ze front of it."

"Gladiator is one of mein all-time favourite movies.

Ich cried for an hour vhen Russell Crowe died at ze end, und zen for a further 3 days when ich heard he was straight. Then, vhen I heard about “Cinderella Man” ich thought, ‘At last! He’s coming out!’ - but, alas, it turned out to be about boxing."

"Check aus mein movie, if you haven’t already!

Ze DVD has some AMAZING extras, including 2 minutes of MINDBLOWING cellphone footage David Schvimmer got of Orlando Bloom taking a pischen in ze Chateau Marmont men’s room!"

Bruno is out now on DVD and Blu-ray