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  1. Home
  2. Xbox One

63 most amazing photos of Hideo Kojima being himself

By Ashley Reed, David Houghton
published 19 March 2015

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A surveillance camera?!

A surveillance camera?!

Hideo Kojima is many things to many people. Creator of the Metal Gear series. The dialogue-fetishizing king of cutscenes. The father of Silent Hills. Prolific tweeter of lunches. And, given his propensity for getting into bizarre situations with a camera nearby, he's the subject of some of the weirdest and funniest game-related photography on the internet.

So great is the awesome factor in this Kojima digital photo collection that we knew we had to share its splendor with all of you. You'll laugh, you'll cry, you'll wonder why you don't have a Drive jacket or a thousand gaming awards, and Hideo Kojima will tell you with the aid of funny captions. He knows exactly what you're thinking, after all. He can read your memory card.

Page 1 of 63
Page 1 of 63
"After years of meditation, I have finally transformed my genitals into a horrified duck."

"After years of meditation, I have finally transformed my genitals into a horrified duck."

Page 2 of 63
Page 2 of 63
"Look at this man! His genitals can't turn into anything!"

"Look at this man! His genitals can't turn into anything!"

Page 3 of 63
Page 3 of 63
"And if I really concentrate, I can fire a tiny person out."

"And if I really concentrate, I can fire a tiny person out."

Page 4 of 63
Page 4 of 63
Kojima-senpai notices you. Kojima-senpai notices everything.

Kojima-senpai notices you. Kojima-senpai notices everything.

Page 5 of 63
Page 5 of 63
His smile in the background will chill your bones and possibly empty your bladder.

His smile in the background will chill your bones and possibly empty your bladder.

Page 6 of 63
Page 6 of 63
You're not getting any of this cake, and Kojima's gonna make sure you know it.

You're not getting any of this cake, and Kojima's gonna make sure you know it.

Page 7 of 63
Page 7 of 63
"Christ, that Itagaki. What the fuck is he wearing? Does he think this is a bloody circus or something? Goddamn embarrassment, everywhere we go."

"Christ, that Itagaki. What the fuck is he wearing? Does he think this is a bloody circus or something? Goddamn embarrassment, everywhere we go."

Page 8 of 63
Page 8 of 63
Kojima takes bedazzling to its natural conclusion.

Kojima takes bedazzling to its natural conclusion.

Page 9 of 63
Page 9 of 63
"Merry Christmas, Mum."

"Merry Christmas, Mum."

Page 10 of 63
Page 10 of 63
It was well-known that Kojima and Suda51 had the politest rap battles around.

It was well-known that Kojima and Suda51 had the politest rap battles around.

Page 11 of 63
Page 11 of 63
"WTF? How does this work? There's no scrolly menu. Which end do the bullets go in?"

"WTF? How does this work? There's no scrolly menu. Which end do the bullets go in?"

Page 12 of 63
Page 12 of 63
Kojima was considerably less impressed with his piece of paper than his friend was.

Kojima was considerably less impressed with his piece of paper than his friend was.

Page 13 of 63
Page 13 of 63
"Hahahahaha! But who has the prettiest face? I do, don't I? It's me, isn't it? Yes."

"Hahahahaha! But who has the prettiest face? I do, don't I? It's me, isn't it? Yes."

Page 14 of 63
Page 14 of 63
"They really thought I flew to Germany to talk about BOXES?"

"They really thought I flew to Germany to talk about BOXES?"

Page 15 of 63
Page 15 of 63
Kojima finds his farts way funnier than anyone else does.

Kojima finds his farts way funnier than anyone else does.

Page 16 of 63
Page 16 of 63
Sometimes he finds them way too funny.

Sometimes he finds them way too funny.

Page 17 of 63
Page 17 of 63
But sometimes he goes too far.

But sometimes he goes too far.

Page 18 of 63
Page 18 of 63
And a new pair of pants is required.

And a new pair of pants is required.

Page 19 of 63
Page 19 of 63
Sparklier than the sparkliest Twilight vampire.

Sparklier than the sparkliest Twilight vampire.

Page 20 of 63
Page 20 of 63
Despite varying levels of skill, the Kojima charades team remained hopeful of their chances...

Despite varying levels of skill, the Kojima charades team remained hopeful of their chances...

Page 21 of 63
Page 21 of 63
...only to be met with shattering disappointment.

...only to be met with shattering disappointment.

Page 22 of 63
Page 22 of 63
Kojima's reaction to zombies was always a strange mix of all-consuming terror and erotic pleasure.

Kojima's reaction to zombies was always a strange mix of all-consuming terror and erotic pleasure.

Page 23 of 63
Page 23 of 63
Kojima and Cliffy B have one thing to say to the man.

Kojima and Cliffy B have one thing to say to the man.

Page 24 of 63
Page 24 of 63
Looks like he rolled SNAKE EYES.

Looks like he rolled SNAKE EYES.

AHAHA. AHAHAHAHA.

Page 25 of 63
Page 25 of 63
There's no motion capture going on here, he just wore that out. Kojima makes neon green and cotton balls look good.

There's no motion capture going on here, he just wore that out. Kojima makes neon green and cotton balls look good.

Page 26 of 63
Page 26 of 63
But it's tiring being a trendsetter.

But it's tiring being a trendsetter.

Page 27 of 63
Page 27 of 63
"I love you, Fox Engine. I love you so much I could kiss you. Mmmmm, smoochy-smoochy-smoo."

"I love you, Fox Engine. I love you so much I could kiss you. Mmmmm, smoochy-smoochy-smoo."

Page 28 of 63
Page 28 of 63
Chat Roulette had seemed such a good idea that morning, but Kojima was not impressed with what he saw.

Chat Roulette had seemed such a good idea that morning, but Kojima was not impressed with what he saw.

Page 29 of 63
Page 29 of 63
"Snake? Snake? SNAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKE."

"Snake? Snake? SNAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKE."

Page 30 of 63
Page 30 of 63
"Mmmmmm, this cosplayer smells good. The guy behind him, I do not know about yet."

"Mmmmmm, this cosplayer smells good. The guy behind him, I do not know about yet."

Page 31 of 63
Page 31 of 63
"May the Force be with me. Not you."

"May the Force be with me. Not you."

Page 32 of 63
Page 32 of 63
"Snake, do you like my glasses?"

"Snake, do you like my glasses?"

Page 33 of 63
Page 33 of 63
Kojima is 100% certain that this is an accurate depiction of the American flag and you will not question him.

Kojima is 100% certain that this is an accurate depiction of the American flag and you will not question him.

Page 34 of 63
Page 34 of 63
Kojima was having a good day. But little did he know, the girl in the blue top had been following him for weeks. She was always just behind him. Watching. Waiting.

Kojima was having a good day. But little did he know, the girl in the blue top had been following him for weeks. She was always just behind him. Watching. Waiting.

Page 35 of 63
Page 35 of 63
"This is where I keep my awards. Do you have these awards? No you do not. Because I have them. Punk."

"This is where I keep my awards. Do you have these awards? No you do not. Because I have them. Punk."

Page 36 of 63
Page 36 of 63
"Watch out, Beaky. We must be ever vigilant. They will not stop looking for us as long as they think we're still alive."

"Watch out, Beaky. We must be ever vigilant. They will not stop looking for us as long as they think we're still alive."

Page 37 of 63
Page 37 of 63
"Ah say who... who here has a beers? I demand another beers. Barkeep!"

"Ah say who... who here has a beers? I demand another beers. Barkeep!"

Page 38 of 63
Page 38 of 63
Suddenly the Raiden mariachi outfit makes so much sense.

Suddenly the Raiden mariachi outfit makes so much sense.

Page 39 of 63
Page 39 of 63
Kojima shows off his best Lisa impression.

Kojima shows off his best Lisa impression.

You know, Lisa.

Page 40 of 63
Page 40 of 63
"Count sheep to help me sleep? I will do this. Make them sexy sheep."

"Count sheep to help me sleep? I will do this. Make them sexy sheep."

Page 41 of 63
Page 41 of 63
"This is not how you do a magazine cover. That, that behind me. That is how you do a magazine cover."

"This is not how you do a magazine cover. That, that behind me. That is how you do a magazine cover."

Page 42 of 63
Page 42 of 63
"Er, guys? I think this Global Hypercolor t-shirt is broken. Guys?"

"Er, guys? I think this Global Hypercolor t-shirt is broken. Guys?"

Page 43 of 63
Page 43 of 63
"Ooooh maan that last brownie was a biiiiiig mistake."

"Ooooh maan that last brownie was a biiiiiig mistake."

Page 44 of 63
Page 44 of 63
"Hell of a weekend though. I'm still paying for it, but hell of a weekend."

"Hell of a weekend though. I'm still paying for it, but hell of a weekend."

Page 45 of 63
Page 45 of 63
BAFTA and Kojima share a love for men with one messed-up eye. They understand each other like no one else can.

BAFTA and Kojima share a love for men with one messed-up eye. They understand each other like no one else can.

Page 46 of 63
Page 46 of 63
Kojima and del Toro are adorable when they're plotting how best to make you shit yourself in fear.

Kojima and del Toro are adorable when they're plotting how best to make you shit yourself in fear.

Page 47 of 63
Page 47 of 63
"Every man wants the Drive jacket. BUT KOJIMA ALWAYS GETS WHAT HE WANTS."

"Every man wants the Drive jacket. BUT KOJIMA ALWAYS GETS WHAT HE WANTS."

Page 48 of 63
Page 48 of 63
That awkward moment when you sit down too hard and miss the stool by six inches.

That awkward moment when you sit down too hard and miss the stool by six inches.

Page 49 of 63
Page 49 of 63
Kojima isn't a model, the camera just went off.

Kojima isn't a model, the camera just went off.

Page 50 of 63
Page 50 of 63
"This guy's intense serial-killer staring is freaking me out", they both thought.

"This guy's intense serial-killer staring is freaking me out", they both thought.

Page 51 of 63
Page 51 of 63
That awkward moment when you run into someone who still hasn't got over Raiden.

That awkward moment when you run into someone who still hasn't got over Raiden.

Page 52 of 63
Page 52 of 63
"Ahahahahaha! It is like my face. But it is not my face. Because my face is over here. But my it is a pretty phone because it is like my face. You all must have one."

"Ahahahahaha! It is like my face. But it is not my face. Because my face is over here. But my it is a pretty phone because it is like my face. You all must have one."

Page 53 of 63
Page 53 of 63
There's always some asshole who messes up the photo by looking the wrong way.

There's always some asshole who messes up the photo by looking the wrong way.

Page 54 of 63
Page 54 of 63
I genuinely have no idea why the hell the things in this image could be happening either.

I genuinely have no idea why the hell the things in this image could be happening either.

Page 55 of 63
Page 55 of 63
Kojima's 'Wear Something Shiny or GTFO' parties are always such a laugh.

Kojima's 'Wear Something Shiny or GTFO' parties are always such a laugh.

Page 56 of 63
Page 56 of 63
Kojima's personal sniper-spotter's senses pricked up. Was that a predator in that tree? Or was it just a large leaf?

Kojima's personal sniper-spotter's senses pricked up. Was that a predator in that tree? Or was it just a large leaf?

Page 57 of 63
Page 57 of 63
These days Kojima is too big for public transport. He won't travel on anything less than the shoulder of his giant Snake mech.

These days Kojima is too big for public transport. He won't travel on anything less than the shoulder of his giant Snake mech.

Page 58 of 63
Page 58 of 63
Is it Photoshopped or real? The fact that you have to ask...

Is it Photoshopped or real? The fact that you have to ask...

Page 59 of 63
Page 59 of 63
Kojima couldn't help it. He was miked-up, he felt another fart coming, and it was going to be hilarious.

Kojima couldn't help it. He was miked-up, he felt another fart coming, and it was going to be hilarious.

Page 60 of 63
Page 60 of 63
Some thought that Kojima's progressive fashion sense had gone too far. But he didn't care. His new left shoulder pad was awesome.

Some thought that Kojima's progressive fashion sense had gone too far. But he didn't care. His new left shoulder pad was awesome.

Page 61 of 63
Page 61 of 63
Kojima is a serious developer. This is a serious game.

Kojima is a serious developer. This is a serious game.

Page 62 of 63
Page 62 of 63
Do you think love can bloom even in a photo gallery?

Do you think love can bloom even in a photo gallery?

You now have but a small taste of the majesty that is Hideo Kojima, laser-eyed pioneer auteur and lover of cardboard boxes. Which of these images brought you to tears? Was it out of laughter, or wonder at witnessing Kojima levels of awesomeness? Know any incredible Hideo photos we missed? Sound off in the comments below!

You've seen the face of Kojima, now how about the fruits of his mind? Check out our Metal Gear Solid 5: Phantom Pain Road to the Review, and what we know about Silent Hills so far.

Page 63 of 63
Page 63 of 63
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Ashley Reed
Ashley Reed
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Former Associate Editor at GamesRadar, Ashley is now Lead Writer at Respawn working on Apex Legends. She's a lover of FPS titles, horror games, and stealth games. If you can see her, you're already dead.

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