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The 50 best Marvel movie one-liners you should try and work into conversation

Features
By Gem Seddon published 5 December 2017

From Iron Man to Thor: Ragnarok, here's the best quips from your spandexed superheroes

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"You said it yourself, bitch! We're the guardians of the galaxy!" 

The movie: Guardians of the Galaxy (2014)

Who says it? Peter Quill

The setup: Ronan's plan is foiled as Quill gets his hands around the Infinity Stone, and unites with his fellow crewmates to harness its power. Ronan doesn't quite understand, as he cries out in disbelief "You're mortal! How...?"

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Why its Marvel-lous: 'Cause he says the movie name! Which is their name!

"Geez, somebody get that kid a sandwich!" 

The movie: Captain America (2011)

Who says it? Senator Brandt

The setup: As the suits gather to watch the scrawny Steve Rogers ready himself to be injected full of super-soldier serum, Senator Brandt (Michael Brandon) calls out from the rafters.

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Why its Marvel-lous: Popping up out of the kerfuffle surrounding the experiment, it's the perfect line to slice through the seriousness of the moment. And it's kind of what we'd all been thinking up until that point.

"Funny how annoying a little prick can be, isn't it?" 

The movie: Iron Man 2 (2010)

Who says it? Senator Stern

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The setup: Rhodey and Stark are awarded badges of honor for their work taking out Vanko. When attaching Stark's medal, Senator Stern (Garry Shandling) - who Tony previously belittled - 'accidentally' catches him with the pin.

Why its Marvel-lous: It's brilliant to hear the Senator give as good as he gets.

"I know who you are, Peter Quill, and I am not some starry-eyed waif here to succumb to your... your pelvic sorcery!" 

The movie: Guardians of the Galaxy (2014)

Who says it? Gamora

The setup: In a quiet moment alone, Quill opens up to Gamora (Zoe Saldana) and shares with her the story behind his Walkman. After she listens to one song and becomes somewhat enraptured by it, Quill makes a play for the green-skinned warrior...

Why its Marvel-lous: Gamora might be a stick in the mud at times, but she pretty much hit the nail on the head with her unique analysis of Quill.

"Let me know if 'real power' wants a magazine or anything." 

The movie: Avengers Assemble (2012)

Who says it? Nick Fury

The setup: With Loki imprisoned on S.H.I.E.L.D.'s Helicarrier, Nick Fury and the prettyboy deity squabble. Thor's sibling thinks he's got the upper hand with this barb: "It burns you to have come so close. To have the Tesseract, to have power, unlimited power. And for what? A warm light for all mankind to share. And then to be reminded what real power is." But Fury lays down an even better burn in response.

Why its Marvel-lous: 'Cause Fury ain't afraid of no God.

"Filthy? Oh, she has no idea. If I had a blacklight, this would look like a Jackson Pollock painting." 

The movie: Guardians of the Galaxy (2014)

Who says it? Peter Quill

The setup: Gamora's disgust at the state of Quill's ship prompts the Star-Lord to offer this crude aside to Rocket.

Why its Marvel-lous: Even Rocket shakes his head...

"One thing I've proven is that you can count on me to pleasure myself." 

The movie: Iron Man 2 (2010)

Who says it? Tony Stark

The setup: Stark's senate hearing comes to a close, and the man of the hour exits the courtroom in his typically humorous fashion, offering up a choice sound bite for the press.

Why its Marvel-lous: It sets up Stark's comedic bent, which flares up much more in his second outing.

"He will be the first in a new breed of super-soldiers. And they will personally escort Adolf Hitler to the gates of Hell." 

The movie: Captain America (2011)

Who says it? Colonel Phillips

The setup: Colonel Chester Phillips (Tommy Lee Jones) addresses his newest recruits, cluing them in to the latest plan that's in store for at least one of them.

Why its Marvel-lous: Jones' entire performance as the Colonel can be summed up in this hyperbolic one-liner.

"So are you two... do you... fondue?" 

The movie: Captain America (2011)

Who says it? Steve Rogers

The setup: While Agent Carter (Hayley Atwell) and Howard Stark (Dominic Cooper) fly Steve up in the air to drop him behind enemy lines, the two discuss potential plans for fondue. Which prompts Steve's puzzled response...

Why its Marvel-lous: Aw, Cap's not exactly up to snuff on dating euphemisms, is he?

"Dr. Banner, your work is unparalleled. And I'm a huge fan of the way you lose control and turn into an enormous green rage monster." 

The movie: Avengers Assemble (2012)

Who says it? Tony Stark

The setup: The Avengers assemble at long last, which means it's time for a round of introductions. Leave it to Stark to immediately alienate his future co-worker, Bruce Banner (Mark Ruffalo).

Why its Marvel-lous: Stark's relentless passion for undermining those who pose a threat to him rarely presents without some form of sarcasm. This might be his very best effort thus far.

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Gem Seddon
Gem Seddon
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Freelance Writer

Gem Seddon is a freelance writer working to keep all of you updated on all of the latest and greatest movies and shows on streaming platforms like Netflix and Amazon Prime. Outside of entertainment journalism, Gem can frequently be found writing about the alternative health and wellness industry, and obsessing over all things Aliens and Terminator on Twitter.

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