Ye olde Cloyster hath many ideas on which to opine.
Choice Tweet: “I shouldst make ye con'd-fession: Twas I who killed ye minstrel, Michael Jackson. He mistooketh me for a scrotum of a laddish wain.”
The trials and tribulations of the champ as told via the Champ himself.
Choice Tweet: “@omg_pichuI would be back sooner, but I had issues getting the money together for a good lawyer. My old trainer robbed me blind.”
Like his role in the games, Bidoof is a fat ugly loser with nothing to live for except his next meal at Arby’s.
Choice Tweet: “Finished a tae bo tape... feelin the burn! I definately earned this bucket of hot wings”
Slowpoke is pretty well known for being a one of the duller knives in the drawer, but who knew he was this behind the times?
Choice Tweet: “Oh, I haven't checked my pets.com stock in a while. Hmm, let me go do that right quick.”
EEN SOVIET RUSSIA, MUDKIP CATCHES YOU!
Choice Tweet: “I remember when 'Battleship Potemkin' was number one at the box office...every movie since then has been a disgrace to cinema.”