Fallout 3: How to be an evil SOB

Spoiler Alert: This article contains massive spoilers - proceed at your own risk.

If you were like me on my first playthrough of Fallout 3, you just couldn't do it. You couldn't pull the trigger, choose the cruelest dialog, or pal around with worst terrorists. Maybe you broke into a few houses, stole some empty whiskey bottles, slapped around a few back-talking civilians, but you never cut Moira's head off and laughed as it rolled around on the floor.

So if you're planning to play it safe until you make character number two, you might want to know: just what happens if...? We sacrificed our morals to find out.

If you don't want anything ruined for you, go be an asshole yourself.

Despite sounding remarkably like Sarah Palin, there's something charming about Megaton's ditsy shopkeeper Moira. But if charm slides off you like butter, and you prefer crushing ambition to encouraging it, you can talk her out of her plans to write the Wasteland Survival Guide. Hey now, it's okay, this way you'll have more ammo for me to buy, and I even get a perk out of the deal! See, something good comes from everything!

Somehow, we hate ourselves for hurting the feelings of a collection of prerecorded dialog.

If you've played at all, you should know that early in the game you have a few choices - one of which is to blow the shit out of all the little people in Megaton. For some reason our sassy friend Moira seems to always get the brunt of our bad deeds.

Do you like Galaxy News Radio's soothing tunes, but hate the snarky interruptions from Three Dog? Well, after his usefulness in your search for Dad expires, you can put him away like just another filthy mole rat.


  • edudls - April 18, 2010 4:57 p.m.

    i generally do some of these things, but my character will wind up being neutral because there are certain quests i choose to do the good way for personal gain (ie: Wasteland Survival Guide)
  • Xplosive59 - December 9, 2008 6:02 p.m.

    another badass thing that you have to do is tell dogmeat to wait on about 3o mines then experimental MIRV(or Fatman) him into space its good fun tosee a dog carcase fly out of megaton at the speed of sound, remember to stay back when firing!
  • Facetious1 - November 18, 2008 8:53 p.m.

    I went through and murdered everyone (well, almost) in Megaton before I blew it up. I got some decent noob gear and a bunch of caps. I took out Moira's bodyguard but she wouldn't die. I haven't gone back yet, but I give you an update when I do.
  • Sash - November 18, 2008 12:51 p.m.

    Makes me want to pick the game back up lol
  • NelosAngelos - November 15, 2008 10:39 p.m.

    Poor Moira...but a small sacrifice to pay for the sweet sensation of evilness. Sometimes you gotta break a few eggs to makes some omelets
  • FancyRat - November 15, 2008 4:30 a.m.

    I thought I was the only who thought she sounded like Palin!
  • georgeguy - November 15, 2008 1:15 a.m.

    this game looks really good. but dang, i never knew you could be come that evil
  • Blade1006 - November 14, 2008 11:40 p.m.

    First to say first anyway I am just naturally evil
  • MobstahLobstah - November 14, 2008 7:32 p.m.

    You monsters... Haha just kiddin' Great article
  • hun23 - November 14, 2008 1:52 p.m.

    After a certain Main Quest involving the Jefferson Memorial (first time), go back to the Vault. you should pick up a Emergency Vault 101 radio signal. after tuning in to it, you learn the new password to the door. go into the vault and do whatever you want. as i stated before, i went Jason on them. yes, i accidentally wrote "also, i will everyone" when i was supposed to write Also, i killed everyone.
  • TheFish - November 14, 2008 8:12 a.m.

    but still, really good attilce (mistake intended).
  • vic88 - November 14, 2008 6:39 a.m.

    ya'll bunch o' carzys
  • SilverWerewolf - November 13, 2008 8:24 p.m.

    I would say you are cold-hearted, and definetly sociopathic, if this game was a psychological exam. I have yet to try the evils of Fallout 3, but it doesn't appeal to me, anyway.
  • xd3monax - November 19, 2008 3:39 a.m.

    Man I might just have a wee bit of an evil nature: I slaughtered the town of megaton not with a bomb but with a 10mm. It was fun; I even killed the little daddy just because I wanted his scoped45. I hack I steal I kill I hack I steal I kill I hack I steal I kill I hack I steal I kill My favorite pastime is robbing caravans by placing frag-mines in the guard and shopkeepers pockets, and beating the two head cow to death with my fists. (Is that sociopathic?) They call me a defiler but I’m just a kid that suffers from being soci-isolated underground for 19 years and picked on by an ass named butch…
  • Tymiegie - November 18, 2008 12:27 a.m.

    Yeah betrayals are great. I found the declaration of Independence with some chick and after we got it and left I murdered her for her gun
  • SaulFidgeonGuy - November 17, 2008 8:32 p.m.

    lol best evil thing ive done is chase simm's son around his house with a sledgehammer :L i felt pure evil betrayals are also fun: agreeing to help roy phillips then turning around and blowing his head up, blowing up megaton then killing burke and tenpenny
  • Pyro240 - November 16, 2008 4:11 p.m.

    Wow, Moira does sound like Palin...
  • Cwf2008 - November 16, 2008 12:27 a.m.

    Huh i never thought of it before but Moria does sound like Palin...makes sense seeing as they're both mentally unstable, annoying jackasses
  • TheFish - November 14, 2008 8:11 a.m.

    Blowing up a town and F*%$#@g up all the survivors is still not hardcore enough, smoke's fatality is still pretty badass.
  • TastyCakesMcgee - November 14, 2008 8:01 a.m.

    really good artical.

Showing 1-20 of 33 comments

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