10 simple steps to being a better videogame bad guy

Because we want to give the grunts a fighting chance

Words: on April 16, 2009
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We've killed countless enemies in our time playing games. Thousands. Maybe even millions. We like to think it's because we're full of skill, but the truth is that gaming's grunts just aren't that smart. It's almost like they want to be shot to bits or blown to pieces. So to even things up a bit for the recruits of gaming's axis of evil - whether terrorist, Nazi or hostile alien - here are 10 simple steps to being a better videogame bad guy.

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Platforms:

Xbox 360, PS3, PS2, Wii, PC, PSP, DS, Xbox, GameCube

67 Comments
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  • DARK_SIDE

    DARK_SIDE  - 2 years, 1 month ago  - Report

    Hahahaha 1 5 6 and 7 were the best
    Reply
  • pandasrock

    pandasrock  - 2 years, 2 months ago  - Report

    call of duty modern warfare 2 was supposed to fix enemy stupidness but they forgot number 9.......
    Reply
  • hardcore_gamer1990

    hardcore_gamer1990  - 2 years, 9 months ago  - Report

    "i am completely invisible to the enemy....

    bugger"


    LOL
    Reply
  • ReaperOfDarkness

    ReaperOfDarkness  - 2 years, 9 months ago  - Report

    Haha really funny article the pictures were fanatastic and clever.

    One thing i noticed was that securing your helmet is actually a mistake. Soldiers dont do that they keep the straps open. The helemt is secured in non combat dress situations only. A helmet with the strap on can decapitate you if something explodes or hits the helmet near you. Strap on means head flies off with helemt strap off mean helmet flies off with head still attached :)
    Reply
  • samsterman2

    samsterman2  - 2 years, 9 months ago  - Report

    awesomly hillarious article
    Reply
  • crazycrazy83

    crazycrazy83  - 2 years, 9 months ago  - Report

    hilarious
    Reply
  • EvilInkarnate

    EvilInkarnate  - 2 years, 9 months ago  - Report

    This was by far the funniest article I've read in a while!! I love the "NO!! This is wrong". It makes me think of the episode of Aqua Teen with Ted Nugent. UNACCEPTABLE!! lol
    Reply
  • bi9foot

    bi9foot  - 2 years, 10 months ago  - Report

    @gernboes it says ummanned not emplaced

    good article
    Reply
  • Thelonius

    Thelonius  - 2 years, 10 months ago  - Report

    awesome article as always gr!
    Reply
  • deathrebellion

    deathrebellion  - 2 years, 10 months ago  - Report

    LMAO if they took ur advise den we'd never be gud at games now will we??
    Reply
  • Wacko237

    Wacko237  - 2 years, 10 months ago  - Report

    lol BUGGER!
    Reply
  • BlackElement17

    BlackElement17  - 2 years, 10 months ago  - Report

    Insightfull
    Reply
  • MrQuatloo

    MrQuatloo  - 2 years, 10 months ago  - Report

    Nice, but you forgot one thing: instede of using guns just blow them up with hand grenades nobody can stop those
    Reply
  • Estacado

    Estacado  - 2 years, 10 months ago  - Report

    hahaha the 9 is the best xD
    Reply
  • wiisixty

    wiisixty  - 2 years, 10 months ago  - Report

    lmao hilarious feature
    Reply
  • metalgatesolid

    metalgatesolid  - 2 years, 10 months ago  - Report

    I'd like to see a game where you control grunts. It would play alot like lemmings. You postion your grunts near more hazzards(like the red barrel) and once a timer runs down the 'hero' runs in shooting the hazzards and you get points for mass grunt kills, grunt suicide and stupidity, and over the top grunt kills (i.e 10 grunts standing below a grate held up with floss)
    Reply
  • Corsair89

    Corsair89  - 2 years, 10 months ago  - Report

    Wait, what? Hide BEHIND cover?!?!?!? That's crazy talk. lol. :P
    Reply
  • Gotxxrock

    Gotxxrock  - 2 years, 10 months ago  - Report

    aaawwwww...
    I love bad AI though :)
    Reply
  • Spybreak8

    Spybreak8  - 2 years, 10 months ago  - Report

    lol yea who would have though the days of doom and exploding barrels would live on!^^
    Reply
  • noobeater

    noobeater  - 2 years, 10 months ago  - Report

    hugely funny the second page was the funniest especially the shadow picture

    to be fair im quite happy with enemies not doing 1 through to 10
    Reply
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