Skip to main content
GamesRadar+ GamesRadar+ GamesRadar+ The Games, Movies, TV & Comics You Love
Sign in
  • View Profile
  • Sign out
flag of UK
UK
flag of US
US
flag of Canada
Canada
flag of Australia
Australia
  • Games
  • TV
  • Movies
  • Hardware
  • Video
  • News
  • Reviews
  • Guides
  • Deals
  • More
    • PS5
    • Xbox Series X
    • Nintendo Switch
    • Nintendo Switch 2
    • PC
    • Platforms
    • Tabletop Gaming
    • Comics
    • Toys & Collectibles
    • SFX
    • Newsarama
    • Retro Gamer
    • Newsletters
    • About us
    • Features
Total Film
Gaming Magazines
Gaming Magazines
Why subscribe?
  • Subscribe from just £3
  • Takes you closer to the games, movies and TV you love
  • Try a single issue or save on a subscription
  • Issues delivered straight to your door or device
From$12
View
Trending
  • Prime Day Deals
  • Superman
  • Donkey Kong Bananza
  • Switch 2 stock
Recommended reading
Key art for Super Smash Bros. Ultimate, showing fighters including Mario, Link, Bowser, and Inkling.
Super Smash Bros "Everyone is here": the three magic words that made Super Smash Bros. Ultimate one of Nintendo's greatest achievements
Death Stranding 2
Open World Games I'm enjoying Death Stranding 2, but I wish Hideo Kojima would stop teasing me with cool powers I'll never have
Rematch
Sports Games Forget FIFA, Rematch is the most authentic football game I've ever played – right down to the very worst bits about playing IRL
Rematch
Sports Games How to unlock titles in Rematch
Best Xbox 360 games: a screenshot of an Xbox 360 console next to a controller and a collection of games.
Games 25 Best Xbox 360 games of all time
Screenshot featuring Toad and Toadette from the Wii U version of Captain Toad: Treasure Tracker
Games The 25 best Wii U games of all time
Best anime games: Oliver and Drippy looking at a book during the game Ni No Kuni: Wrath of the White Witch.
Games The 20 best anime games to play in 2025
  1. Games

Games called 'ultimate' that are nothing of the sort

Features
By Justin Towell published 18 November 2013

Someone should send these guys a dictionary

When you purchase through links on our site, we may earn an affiliate commission. Here’s how it works.

This is the ultimate gallery slide (yeah, sure it is)

This is the ultimate gallery slide (yeah, sure it is)

Believe it or not, there are around 300 entertainment software titles that contain the word Ultimate in their name. Thats one heck of a lot of superlatives. Because ultimate is the best. Youre never going to get better than ultimate. Unless you said ultimate plus one!, but thats just stupid.

So heres our list of ultimate games that are categorically not ultimate in any way. Let the shaming begin!

Page 1 of 11
Page 1 of 11
Dizzy: The Ultimate Cartoon Adventure (Spectrum, 1987)

Dizzy: The Ultimate Cartoon Adventure (Spectrum, 1987)

This was the inspiration for this feature. Meet Dizzy, a cartoon egg who rolls over as he jumps simply because his developers had gotten hold of some sprite rotation software. He starred in some amazing games, not least Treasure Island Dizzy, Fantasy World Dizzy and Magicland Dizzy. But, ironically, this is his first outing, which started everything off by boldly declaring itself The Ultimate Cartoon Adventure. No room for improvement there. Might as well go home.

Why it isnt the ultimate: Because weve had so many objectively better cartoon adventures since the original Dizzy, itd actually be closer to the truth if it was called Dizzy: The absolute worst cartoon adventure. Not strictly true (remember Bubsy 2?) but more true than what they actually went with.

Page 2 of 11
Page 2 of 11
Ultimate Band (Wii/DS, 2009)

Ultimate Band (Wii/DS, 2009)

Disney's Guitar Hero rip-off has this to say of its content: "You can jam and perform to 15 timeless songs on the drums, lead guitar, bass guitar or rhythm guitar. Become the best songwriter in rock history, as you lay down tracks in the recording studio and apply creative mixing effects to create that ultimate song which will make you the Ultimate Band!"

Why it isn't the ultimate: Because the ultimate band would be John Lennon on Vocals/Piano, Jimi Hendrix on lead guitar, Tom Morello on rhythm, Lemmy on bass and Ginger Baker on drums. Now look at the picture above and tell me that line-up of malformed blow-up Steps dolls is better. There you go.

Page 3 of 11
Page 3 of 11
Ultimate Basketball (NES, 1990)

Ultimate Basketball (NES, 1990)

Frankly, Im amazed the 2K Sports team even bothers making new basketball games. The 1080p lushness of the new PS4 version is all well and good, but it cant ever be the absolute best basketball experience around, because the NES called that in 1990. To its credit, all the ingredients are there, including some pretty snazzy close-up cinematics when the ball gets close to the hoop (inset), but the ultimate basketball game shouldnt ever garner critique containing the words to its credit.

Why it isnt the Ultimate: Not with those shorts, son.

Page 4 of 11
Page 4 of 11
Hitman: Ultimate Contract (PC, 2009)

Hitman: Ultimate Contract (PC, 2009)

This 2009 collection brings together all of Agent 47s misadventures under one cardboard lid (or at least the ones that had been released up until that point, obviously). Four games. And presumably the contract part of the title is that between you and the shop keeper when you buy this game. Its the best contract youll ever make.

Why it isnt ultimate: Never mind the fact more Hitman games would come later, surely the Hitman Ultimate Contract would be the one where someone pays 47 to kill himself. Right? Well, this collection doesnt do that.

Page 5 of 11
Page 5 of 11
Ultimate Soccer

Ultimate Soccer

Stop laughing, this was impressive tech for 1993. Minute details like the weight of the ball and how it reacts to the surface its rolling on are simulated, as is a pseudo-3D perspective of the pitch. Ive actually played it and its alright. A ringing endorsement if ever there was one.

Why it isnt the ultimate: Well, even on Mega Drive, by this point the ultimate football game had evidently been released in the shape of Sensible Soccer. Ultimate Soccer may have looked better and sounded better, but if it wasnt even ultimate at the time, its hardly going to stand up against FIFA 14, is it? Also, despite all the betters it clearly has to its name, at no point would anyone be able to say this game is best. Except whoever wrote the title, obviously.

Page 6 of 11
Page 6 of 11
Ultimate Wizard (Commodore 64, 1986)

Ultimate Wizard (Commodore 64, 1986)

Adding wizardy language like Prepare Thyself, Player 1 and Wizercise is obviously how you wizard up a supercharged Donkey Kong Junior clone on Commodore 64. And it does actually sound rather lovely when it first loads up with its wonderful 8-bit sound effects. Until you realise they used *all* the sound effects. All of them. Climbed a ladder? Sound effect. Cut your nails? Sound effect. Breathed in and out? Sound effect. They dont make em like this any more, folks.

Why it isnt the Ultimate: I highly doubt the ultimate wizard would always run like hes on fire. And besides, Gandalf is obviously the ultimate wizard. Look at this one. This one isnt even as good Ron Weasley.

Page 7 of 11
Page 7 of 11
Ultimate I Spy (Wii, 2008)

Ultimate I Spy (Wii, 2008)

Ultimate I Spy is an I Spy game for Wii. In it, you must move the camera through a 3D environment to find objects suggested to you via some (very simple) riddles. It's aimed at children and seems harmless enough, although I love how they tried to illustrate I Spy by showing everything on the cover.

Why it isn't the 'ultimate': Because the ultimate game of I Spy was played between Fiona Applehart-Fauntleroy and her cousins Maisy Sinjun-Beechcroft and Michael 'Titch' Sinjun-Beechcroft at 2:18pm on August 24, 1954. A little-known fact, that one. Nobody ever guessed the final 'P' was for 'penis'. A secret she carried with her to her grave. Nah, not really. Let's go with 'because it's on Wii'.

Page 8 of 11
Page 8 of 11
Ultimate Ride (PC, 2004)

Ultimate Ride (PC, 2004)

Ultimate Ride is a 3D rollercoaster-building simulation. You get to mould themed environments into whatever shape you like, run your rollercoaster track through it in any way you like and then populate the route with amazing incidental details, like this incredible low-polygon dragon. Awww, he's got a little house and everything.

Why it isnt the ultimate: Theres no Twitter integration. Or Oculus Rift support (now that would be cool or at least a surefire method of regurgitating whatever you just ate). And of course the RAM limitations of 12-year-old gaming mean that the experience is incredibly one-note from a visual point of view. Basically, it would be better if they added a third colour. Anywhere.

Page 9 of 11
Page 9 of 11
Marvel Ultimate Alliance (Multi, 2006)

Marvel Ultimate Alliance (Multi, 2006)

Spidey, Wolverine and all your other cartoon pals team up to smash bad guys into next week. Solid 8/10 fare ensued (which is quite sad, really, if the ultimate Marvel alliance is merely quite good) but it was an impressive team-up event nonetheless. But let's just say for argument's sake it really was a 10/10 game. OK. Ready?

Why it isnt the ultimate: It had a sequel called Marvel Ultimate Alliance 2. What did I say about Infinity +1?

Page 10 of 11
Page 10 of 11
Did we name the site wrong?

Did we name the site wrong?

Who am I kidding? The word 'Ultimate' clearly makes all these games the ideal purchase decisions. Why play Ni No Kuni when you can play Dizzy The Ultimate Adventure? Exactly. So we should probably name GR 'GamesRadar Ultimate'. Or even 'Ultimate GamesRadar'. '2'. The petition starts here, folks. By the way, if you can think of any more 'Ultimate' games that aren't anything of the sort, do let us know in the comments.

And if you're looking for more, check out 10 incredibly interesting things you didn't know about Dizzy and 12 great games with god-awful boxart.

Page 11 of 11
Page 11 of 11
CATEGORIES
Android iPad iPhone PC Gaming Wii-u Nintendo PlayStation PS4 Xbox Xbox One Platforms Mobile Gaming
Justin Towell
Justin Towell
Social Links Navigation

Justin was a GamesRadar staffer for 10 years but is now a freelancer, musician and videographer. He's big on retro, Sega and racing games (especially retro Sega racing games) and currently also writes for Play Magazine, Traxion.gg, PC Gamer and TopTenReviews, as well as running his own YouTube channel. Having learned to love all platforms equally after Sega left the hardware industry (sniff), his favourite games include Christmas NiGHTS into Dreams, Zelda BotW, Sea of Thieves, Sega Rally Championship and Treasure Island Dizzy.

See more Games Features
Read more
Key art for Super Smash Bros. Ultimate, showing fighters including Mario, Link, Bowser, and Inkling.
"Everyone is here": the three magic words that made Super Smash Bros. Ultimate one of Nintendo's greatest achievements
Death Stranding 2
I'm enjoying Death Stranding 2, but I wish Hideo Kojima would stop teasing me with cool powers I'll never have
Rematch
Forget FIFA, Rematch is the most authentic football game I've ever played – right down to the very worst bits about playing IRL
Rematch
How to unlock titles in Rematch
Best Xbox 360 games: a screenshot of an Xbox 360 console next to a controller and a collection of games.
25 Best Xbox 360 games of all time
Screenshot featuring Toad and Toadette from the Wii U version of Captain Toad: Treasure Tracker
The 25 best Wii U games of all time
Latest in Games
Borderlands 4 screenshot showcasing four different Vault Hunters taking on enemies with various weapons
As Borderlands 4 fans create a skill tree planner months before launch, creative director issues a reminder that "the game isn't done yet" and their builds are "subject to change"
Hideo Kojima posing with Usada Pekora
Hideo Kojima's favorite vtuber found herself in Death Stranding 2, and her immediate reaction was a mix of happiness and self-cringe: "I'm so embarrassed. She's still yapping"
Ahoy
$700,000 in Kickstarter booty says Sid Meier's Pirates! sickos are fully on board with this first-person, open world, and "most importantly - authentic" take on nautical history that's lacking in Sea of Thieves and Black Flag
Team Fortress 2 soldier holding two grenades
Valve "cracked the problem that Netflix was struggling with" using diehard gamers and their backlogs, Steam expert says: "You get access to a bunch of drunken sailors who spend money irresponsibly"
Sigil 2 cover art of horned goat demon
"Romero Games is not closed": After reports of layoffs caused by Microsoft, Romero Games says it did lose funding but has now heard from "several publishers interested in helping us"
Concord
EU publisher group addresses Stop Killing Games movement in early double down: killing online games "must be an option," and this proposal would make them "prohibitively expensive to create"
Latest in Features
Kaizen: A Factory Story key art featuring a production line making a toy electronic
"Make games and die. That's my plan": Coincidence's Zach Barth on making games about making things, a year of teaching, and being in it for the long haul
Cyberpunk Edgerunners
Cyberpunk Edgerunners season 2: Everything we know about CD Projekt Red's anime
Ghost, Bob, Yelena, and John Walker peeking around a corner in Thunderbolts
Marvel Phase 5 closes a weird, ramshackle chapter in MCU history – and shows what Marvel needs to get right in Phase 6
David Corenswet, Rachel Brosnahan, and Skyler Gisondo in Superman
Do I need to watch any movies or TV shows before Superman?
David Corenswet as Superman in James Gunn's Superman
James Gunn's Superman looks like a comics-accurate take on the Man of Steel at last – but will it be enough to revive DC at the box office?
A cropped screenshot from Undertale, showing Frisk and Sans standing in Grillby's in Snowdin.
17 years after it was released, I'm tracing Undertale and Deltarune's origins back to Toby Fox's spooky Earthbound mod
  1. A Gundam style mech in Mecha Break
    1
    Mecha Break review: "This mech battler makes up for lacking customization with a varied roster that lets me live out my Evangelion fantasy"
  2. 2
    Death Stranding 2: On the Beach review: "This tarpunk delivery epic is more Metal Gear Solid than ever, for better and worse"
  3. 3
    Rematch review: "As with Rocket League, the just-one-more-game pull is magnetic"
  4. 4
    Tron: Catalyst review: "Disc slinging is a thrill in this gorgeous rendition of the series, but I'm let down by a time-loop story that falls flat"
  5. 5
    FBC: Firebreak review: "A disappointingly bland multiplayer FPS that's missing far too much of what made Control special"
  1. A T-rex in Jurassic World Rebirth
    1
    Jurassic World Rebirth Review: "An unscary sequel that needed a little more time in amber"
  2. 2
    M3GAN 2.0 review: "A bold sequel with a slightly underwhelming conclusion"
  3. 3
    28 Years Later Review: "Enough terror, splatter and suspense to satisfy”
  4. 4
    Predator: Killer of Killers review: "Great characters, thrilling action, and gorgeous Arcane-esque animation"
  5. 5
    From the World of John Wick: Ballerina review: "Brilliant action, even if the plot gives you a sense of déjà vu"
  1. Lee Jung-jae as Gi-hun in Squid Game season 3
    1
    Squid Game season 3 review: "A staggeringly excellent final season wraps up one of the greatest Netflix shows ever"
  2. 2
    Ironheart review: "A relic of Marvel's content-at-all-costs era"
  3. 3
    Star Trek: Strange New Worlds season 3 review: "The show's most assured run of episodes to date"
  4. 4
    Doctor Who season 2, episode 8 spoiler review: 'The Reality War' is "a mix of the good, the bad, and the truly baffling"
  5. 5
    Doctor Who season 2, episode 7 spoiler review: 'Wish World' is "an exciting and ambitious" start to the season finale, with hints of WandaVision

GamesRadar+ is part of Future US Inc, an international media group and leading digital publisher. Visit our corporate site.

  • About Us
  • Contact Future's experts
  • Terms and conditions
  • Privacy policy
  • Cookies policy
  • Advertise with us
  • Review guidelines
  • Write for us
  • Accessibility Statement
  • Careers

© Future US, Inc. Full 7th Floor, 130 West 42nd Street, New York, NY 10036.

Please login or signup to comment

Please wait...