50 Worst Movie Sex Scenes

Flypaper (1997)

The Scene: Meth lab worker Lucy Liu and James Wilder test out a new anti-venom by getting in a water-free pool filled with deadly snakes. Then having sex.

Look Away When: The pair copulate as narked snakes bite their naked bods.

Purple Rain (1984)

The Scene: Prince and Apollonia Kotero struggle to evoke even the tiniest flame of passion for their minute-long sex scene, which mostly involves the former rubbing the latter all over.

Look Away When: Prince starts rubbing his face in Kotero’s hair.

Miami Vice (2006)

The Scene: Colin Farrell and Gong Li get together in a shadowy bedroom, looking moodily at one another in a distinctly unsexy montage.

Look Away When: Li starts to cry.

Irrversible (2002)

The Scene: A nine-minute assault on the senses, as Alex (Monica Bellucci) is beaten to the ground and anally raped. Hideous.

Look Away When: Alex enters the underpass.

Demolition Man (1993)

The Scene: Sly Stallone’s defrosted action man discovers that sex in the future is all done via a strange little device. And there’s no physical contact whatsoever.

Look Away When: Sandra Bullock whips out the hardware.

Eyes Wide Shut (1999)

The Scene: A ridiculously over-choreographed orgy that looks like something you’d find in a really smutty opera.

Look Away When: Naked people in masks start turning up.

The Matrix Reloaded (2003)

The Scene: Neo (Keanu Reeves) and Trinity (Carrie-Anne Moss) have sweaty cave sex as all the other Zion inhabitants pant and dance to delirious tribal music.

Look Away When: The dreadlocks start swirling. Enough already.

Wild Things (1998)

The Scene: Matt Dillon has a morally bankrupt threesome with Neve Campbell and Denise Richards.

Look Away When: Dillon grabs Campbell and Richards by the skull and forces them to kiss. Just. So. Wrong.

Kissed (1996)

The Scene: Sandra Larson (Molly Parker) locks herself in the morgue to do the nasty with a stiff. We throw up a little.

Look Away When: Sandra starts circling the dead body on the table. Trust us, you don’t need to see this.

Nowhere To Run (1993)

The Scene: Jean-Claude Van Damme’s first ever sex scene falls flatter than a joke about being thirsty at an AA meeting.

Look Away When: Van Damme gets his kit off.