RPG Emo-Off

You know the type: spiky hair, sad eyes, too many belt buckles in his ensemble to count. You might meet one or two of these guys in fighting games, or starring in a Prince of Persia sequel; more often than not, you’ll see them wangsting their hearts out in a sprawling Japanese RPG epic.

Why so emo? There are tons of excuses, such as “My girlfriend/wife/child/puppy died,†or “My village burned/sunk/froze,†and let’s not forget “I can’t find the door to this world... or my heart.â€

But who is the most emo? Who has the most cause to mope around in a huge trench coat, muttering to himself and sighing compulsively? Read on as we pair off the angstiest, whiniest, saddest boys and girls of JPRGs and find out which one trumps them all.

Warning! Spoilers for the following…
Final Fantasy VII, Final Fantasy IX, Final Fantasy X-2, Eternal Sonata, Final Fantasy VIII, Kingdom Hearts, Tales of Vesperia, Tales of Symphonia, Lost Odyssey, Persona 3

Games: Final Fantasy VII & Final Fantasy VIII

You knew this day would come. Two of Square Enix’s heavy-hitters in the heartbreak department meet to compare tales of woe. Here’s how they stack up:


Above: (Am I… alone?)


Above: What about my pain?

Winner: Cloud – because you can’t top a dead girlfriend.