Living large
Life is pretty cool and all, but wouldnt it be easier if we all lived in The Sims 3? Since the first game launched in 2000, the human simulation series has been giving gamers the opportunity to indulge their whims, no matter how unrealistic, mundane, or even sadistic they may be (dont pretend youve never stuck a Sim in the pool and took away the ladder). Its that freedom that turns everyday tasks like going to the bathroom and making dinner into fascinating gameplay elements. Of course, The Sims isnt at all like real life - its better.
Here are ten reasons why.
There's an encouraging 0% unemployment rate
Getting a job is one of the worst parts of being a human being. In The Sims, you can skip the crushing disappointment of unanswered applications and nerve-wracking interviews. If you want a career, simply pick up a newspaper or log onto your computer and chose the job of your liking. Professional athlete? Astronaut? Ghost hunter? No problem. Even self-employment is as simple as registering for your preferred trade and collecting a weekly stipend.
On the other hand, if you went to the headquarters of your ideal occupation and demanded to start working there the following day, youd probably be escorted out by security and barred from the premises. And even if you do land your dream job, its doubtful youd move up the chain and be CEO of the company in a matter of weeks.
Read a book, absorb its knowledge
If you want to get better at something in real life, you probably have to spend months, maybe even years, developing your abilities and practicing your skills. Boring! The Sims lets players read books on almost any skill imaginable and become better as they go. Without ever leaving your house, you can become a master fisherman, an accomplished nectar maker, or a logical genius. Whens the last time a book did something like that for you?
And while books may have certain educational purposes in the real world, its unlikely that well ever become more charismatic by avoiding human contact and reading in the privacy of our own homes. Maybe if books had more instantaneous benefits, wed have paid more attention in school.
No one will tell you TV turns your brain to mush
You might watch The Food Network every day, but that doesnt make you Bobby Flay. In The Sims, television isnt just an effective form of entertainment; it can actually raise skills without any actual effort. Cookin Cable lets aspiring chefs improve their cooking abilities and memorize new recipes without setting a foot in the kitchen. Got Garden provides all of the experience of having a green thumb without the dirt, bugs, and other hazards of the outside world. And Fishing Fracas is perfect for Sims looking to improve their skills without having to spend a day at the lake.
So the next time youre vegging out on the couch watching a Chopped marathon, just remember: If you lived in The Sims, youd be a world-class chef by now.
Artists dont starve, they thrive
No matter what your craft, being an artist is tough. Getting your big break can take years of work, constant rejection, and no guarantee that any of it will ever pay off.
Not so much in The Sims. Any Sim with an easel can paint, and you can sell your work right away. Sure, your early stuff may not rake in the big Simoleans, but keep at it and youre sure to be the next Picasso. Similarly, all that you need to be an author is a computer. Getting a publisher? Pssh, no big deal. Just start typing and youre on your way to a nice check and weekly royalties. Musicians have it easiest of all guitar players can head to the theater and sign up for a career in music. Prefer a different instrument? No problem! Keyboardists, bassists, drummers, and singers can all achieve stardom without the years of trying to be discovered.
Kaching! The money code gives instant wealth
Sure, you can play The Sims within the games budget, slowly saving your Simoleans and trying to amass a fortune over generations or you could skip that and go right for the riches. Probably the most commonly used cheat code for The Sims, motherlode grants 50,000 Simoleans, and theres no limit to how many times it can be used. Have your eye on the biggest mansion in town? Want to install a super-sized pool and a handful of hot tubs on your property? Need to have the best of everything? Just dont want to worry about not being able to make ends meet? Use the code and youre good to go.
Its not really clear what real-life money codes would do to the world economy, but who cares wed be rich! Instead, were stuck earning a paycheck and budgeting our money like, you know, normal people. Wheres the fun in that?
You can build your dream home without judgment from architects
Imagine your perfect home. Maybe its so unique that theres nothing else like it; to live in that house, youd have to build it from the ground up. In real life, thats a lot of effort just for a specialized house with six bathrooms, four basements, and a backyard maze.
Though each town in The Sims has plenty of houses for your Sim families to move into, there are also empty stretches of land for sale. Purchase one of those and you can build your dream home in hours, not years! Dont worry if your house doesnt fit in with the neighbors, because you wont have any pesky Homeowners Associations breathing down your neck. And if you change your mind later (maybe that moat isnt working out as well as you thought it would), changing things up doesnt require major construction.
Only three days stand between you and parenthood
Were sure pregnancy is beautiful, magical, and full of wonder but wouldnt it be easier if kids went from conception to birth in 72 hours? Once again, The Sims beats real-life with a three-day pregnancy period. That means only one day of morning sickness and about a day and a half of needing maternity clothes, so theres no need to buy a pregnancy wardrobe you may never need again.
This is especially great for Sims who want big families and lots of kids and grandkids. In just a week or two, you could have your own personal Brady Bunch. Our sources tell us that having six kids in real life takes significantly longer, which doesnt seem fair at all.
Having kids is better when you can pick their traits
After an exhausting three-day pregnancy, a baby Sim is born! And in addition to picking his or her name, Sims with successful pregnancies can choose traits for the baby to start out his or her life. Maybe you want Sirius Batman to be an artistic genius, and Sapphire Dandelion to be neurotic and evil, just to balance things out. Not a problem! Even better, as long as they do well throughout toddlerhood and school, youll be picking their traits until they reach adulthood.
Without getting into a nature vs. nurture debate, were pretty sure you cant do this in real life. If we could, wed make sure our offspring were super smart and ultra creative, as well as given abilities that will allow them to strike it rich so we can retire early.
You can give yourself a makeover with every trip to the bathroom
Changing your look isnt always easy. Growing out hair for a new style can take months, maybe even years. Dying hair can be tedious and even painful. And then, of course, theres always a chance that you wont like your new style, but thats too bad youre stuck with it.
In The Sims, you can change your hair just by looking in a mirror. Make it longer, shorter, non-existent. Dye it bright pink, add green highlights, bleach the tips. Guys, you can even change up your facial hair in a second. So while youre struggling to maintain that peach fuzz, remember that if you were in The Sims, youd have a full-grown beard to be reckoned with. Whens the last time you accomplished something so awesome in a bathroom?
Death actually isn't the end
Death is a part of life, but that doesnt make it suck any less. Thankfully, death in The Sims doesnt mean your characters disappear completely. Keep a deceased Sims tombstone or urn on your property, and his or her ghost will haunt your home. These ghosts are more than just spectral nuisances, though. You can interact with them, hang out with them, and even WooHoo with them. And if you get really lonely, a pile of Simoleans and a trip to the science lab can bring your loved ones back to life.
In real life, were pretty sure that WooHooing with the dead is all kinds of illegal. At the very least, its definitely frowned upon.
The Sims does it better
Since there are virtually limitless options when playing The Sims, there are probably things you think are better in the game than real life. Why do you like The Sims better than reality?
And if you're looking for more Simlish goodness, check out the 19 best places to WooHoo in The Sims and the Top 7... "Wait, it's already 3AM?!" games.
