RPG Emo-Off

From sighing to suicide – which JRPG character out-emos them all?

Words: on October 15, 2008

You know the type: spiky hair, sad eyes, too many belt buckles in his ensemble to count. You might meet one or two of these guys in fighting games, or starring in a Prince of Persia sequel; more often than not, you’ll see them wangsting their hearts out in a sprawling Japanese RPG epic. 


Above: Take your pick, they’re all the same 

Why so emo? There are tons of excuses, such as “My girlfriend/wife/child/puppy died,” or “My village burned/sunk/froze,” and let’s not forget “I can’t find the door to this world... or my heart.”

But who is the most emo? Who has the most cause to mope around in a huge trench coat, muttering to himself and sighing compulsively? Read on as we pair off the angstiest, whiniest, saddest boys and girls of JPRGs and find out which one trumps them all.

Warning! Spoilers for the following…
Final Fantasy VII, Final Fantasy IX, Final Fantasy X-2, Eternal Sonata, Final Fantasy VIII, Kingdom Hearts, Tales of Vesperia, Tales of Symphonia, Lost Odyssey, Persona 3


Games: Final Fantasy VII & Final Fantasy VIII

You knew this day would come. Two of Square Enix’s heavy-hitters in the heartbreak department meet to compare tales of woe. Here’s how they stack up:

 

 

Squall

Above: (Am I… alone?)

Cloud

Above: What about my pain?

Winner: Cloud – because you can’t top a dead girlfriend.

Related

Games:


Final Fantasy VIII (PS1)

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Eternal Sonata (Xbox 360)

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Eternal Sonata (PS3)

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Platforms:

Xbox 360, PS3, PS2, PS1, GameCube

51 Comments
Order Comments: Newest First | Oldest First
  • Gurkogg

    Gurkogg  - 8 months, 3 weeks ago  - Report

    You can be depressed and no one around you may notice it, but if you are emo you make sure everyone around you notices it (I think that may be the difference).
  • Tommykrem

    Tommykrem  - 1 year, 6 months ago  - Report

    its not it's! What is happening to me, mein führer!?
  • Tommykrem

    Tommykrem  - 1 year, 6 months ago  - Report

    Been, not bin! I don't know how German made it's way into that comment!
    I swear I have no connections to SS.
  • Tommykrem

    Tommykrem  - 1 year, 6 months ago  - Report

    @BlackKraken
    If you're emo you very clearly express your depression.

    Something a lot of teenagers do to get attention... And perhaps some grown-ups, though it's more common among teenagers since the depression that a lot of people get during puberty, is in stark contrast to the happy, jolly days as a child, so therefore a lot of teenagers have problems coping with their depression (isolate themselves and such), or they can't cope with the depression (suicide) or they cope with it in an alternative way (by being openly emotional = emo, or going on a killing spree)
    So you can be depressed without being emo. Actually I'd go as far as saying that most people who suffer from depression aren't emo.

    Now let's just wait for a kid to reply:
    "You don't understand how it is" oh, go fudge yourself. I too have bin on a killing spree and know how it is.
  • ImAliveOMG

    ImAliveOMG  - 1 year, 7 months ago  - Report

    Umm, I think you might not understand a good part of the definiton of emo. You have some of the basics covered but you could kind of use an update. Take a trip to Urban Dictionary
  • D0CCON

    D0CCON  - 1 year, 11 months ago  - Report

    100 percent agree. Cloud is the opposite of Cecil, Cecil being non-annoying and mature and all of that.
  • craigkiller

    craigkiller  - 2 years, 4 months ago  - Report

    Aw, where's he suicidal guy for Fallout 3? D= The guy from Rivet City ;_;
  • onewingedantista

    onewingedantista  - 2 years, 4 months ago  - Report

    @ jakery22: I hope ur joking.
  • onewingedantista

    onewingedantista  - 2 years, 4 months ago  - Report

    lol Genesis, so true. btw, all his cutscenes sound better in japanese, when you can't understand what he's saying. in english, it sounds so trite.
  • KHfan

    KHfan  - 3 years, 3 months ago  - Report

    ansems not emo he's just a lil messed up in the head

    go squall!
  • JTFLEX

    JTFLEX  - 3 years, 4 months ago  - Report

    squall is the winner cuz i hate him cloud is awesome
  • krunkattack

    krunkattack  - 3 years, 4 months ago  - Report

    wow.. that's some emo stuff! Nice summaries
  • RandomSamurai13

    RandomSamurai13  - 3 years, 4 months ago  - Report

    Wait, at the end the article says that a guy called Gackt wins, but I thought that was Genesis..
  • AFilthyIbis

    AFilthyIbis  - 3 years, 4 months ago  - Report

    Wow. somwhere in Squalls video(3:45) there's a bit that looks like mario kart!
  • EvilZeus

    EvilZeus  - 3 years, 4 months ago  - Report

    i think Squall wins the first one simply because you can see his sadness in full 3D, including the subtle tears crossing his fully animated face, whereas Cloud always looks like a happy little balloonshaped man....
  • BuggattiFreak

    BuggattiFreak  - 3 years, 4 months ago  - Report

    Must kill the emo's.
  • Juriasu

    Juriasu  - 3 years, 4 months ago  - Report

    XD
  • xXgodlypunkXx

    xXgodlypunkXx  - 3 years, 4 months ago  - Report

    EMOS ROCK!! sweet emoness
  • Cybermaster

    Cybermaster  - 3 years, 4 months ago  - Report

    No Neku besides the first picture? Boo. TWEWY FTW.
  • Comatose92

    Comatose92  - 3 years, 4 months ago  - Report

    lol, "and the winner is... Clou-! Wait, scratch that. Genesis!"

    Cloud: "WTF?"
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