Resident Evil actress claims movie with zombie monkeys is a ‘small, independent film’, we call bull and shit

Hear how the $30 dollar film was 'small' and what a massive gamer Milla Jovovich is

Words: on September 10, 2010

Y'know, what? We never realised the seminally shitty Resi movies were actually, at heart, small, independent, European flicks with loads of artistic merit. Hmmm, we guess the fact they're all full of paper mache-looking zombies, awful rock music and were filmed for tens of millions of dollars each really threw us of the scent. Well thankfully, Milla Jovovich who has played Alice in all the Resident Evil films, including the upcoming 3D Afterlife, is here to put us straight in an interview with Reuters that reminds us of a horned mammal's excrement.

According to the model turned actress and wife of the world's most totally not the worst director of all time, in Paul WS Anderson, Resident Evil: "Has always been an independent movie, which I think is very special about it. It's not a studio concoction. We started as a tiny, little European action film, and everybody involved, Paul, myself and Michelle Rodriguez, were into the game. That was the birth of this franchise. It was just people who really love the games, who really love the characters, and love to kick butt and take no prisoners."


Above: Hey, Resident Evil is too every bit as anti Hollywood and artistic as Amélie

Looking over the fact a 30 million dollar budget for the first film is considered 'tiny', here's some further photographic evidence that demonstrates deep down the series is an independent creation, more concerned with conveying a meaningful artistic message than pleasing punters with blood and zombie baboons...

Oh.

Ah well, at least we're promised a real character piece in Resident Evil: Afterlife. Jovovich says: "The characters are just wonderful. You get a chance in this movie to take some time with characters. It's not just action, action, action."

To illustrate this point, here's Prison Break's Wentworth Miller acting the shit out of Chris Redfield.


Above: ACTING!

Source: Reuters

Sep 10, 2010


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38 Comments
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  • pin316

    pin316  - 1 year, 5 months ago  - Report

    i actually quite liked these movies...it's easy to forget seeing as we're surrounded by them nowadays, but the first film came out when Zombie movies weren't popular and all over the shop...it was a actually a pretty big risk and they worked it well. Was one of the first zombie flicks to not portray them as being slow and stupid as well, and they did it pretty awesomely.

    I can't believe someone said that the new Prince of Persia movie is the best video game adaptation they've ever seen - it's gotte be one of the worst films i've watched for a long time!
  • Aardvarkk

    Aardvarkk  - 1 year, 5 months ago  - Report

    Reading all this nerdrage about Resident Evil makes me laugh.

    The movies were fine, the games sucked. I wish the games were more like the movies.
  • PolarBarrett

    PolarBarrett  - 1 year, 5 months ago  - Report

    those movies totally blow
  • mentalityljs

    mentalityljs  - 1 year, 5 months ago  - Report

    @ Catalyst

    I disagree. Even if the writers of the movie were trying to portray a different side of the RE "universe", then how come they intertwined key elements of the games in with the movies? I'll tell you why. Because the directors and writers couldn't figure out how to make the movies interesting enough, even though there were around five, FIVE fucking games for them to take ORIGINAL content from. Yet they still chose to slack out on the bit. There's no excuse for the invention of Alice. She was just a character born out of desperation and lack of willing to understand a once amazingly original series.
  • EroticInvisibleMan

    EroticInvisibleMan  - 1 year, 5 months ago  - Report

    The only RE movie I could ever say I liked was Degeneration. The others were, as far as I'm concerned, far FAR beyond terrible. Too bad they couldn't be like some of the better video game adaptations (Parasite Eve and Forbidden Siren, for instance).
  • shinigamiDude

    shinigamiDude  - 1 year, 5 months ago  - Report

    Why the hell is Alice the main character if all of you truly love the games and love the characters? She shouldn't even be created in the first place. I cursed every time Jill got saved by Alice in RE: A. At least the commentaries were fun in that movie.
  • GhostbustTyler

    GhostbustTyler  - 1 year, 5 months ago  - Report

    I live half an hour away from where they shot some scenes from this movie. When my friend told me about it I was in complete disbelief that they made a fourth one. I hated all three before and this one I won't even go bother to see. I'd rather watch a Resident Evil movie with normal surviors trying to survie then some superhuman who thinks she's jesus.
  • mentalityljs

    mentalityljs  - 1 year, 5 months ago  - Report

    The first two Resi movies were mediocre at best. The 3rd one blew my cock. Fuck Alice. I don't care what gap she was trying to fill. She wasn't a main character in any of the games, or any of that shit. Just a made up character to make the movies into action crap. It amazes me to read that some of the cast actually played the games, yet they continued on with the original script as if nothing was out of place. I'll go see Afterlife just because. Not expecting it to be Resident Evil at all. That, and Milla Jovovich is sexy as hell. Blah
  • Jadernader

    Jadernader  - 1 year, 5 months ago  - Report

    @Catalyst
    The RE movies dont follow the same storyline as the games do... thats what the problem is... how is it that Jill killed Nemesis, but in the movie Alice killed Nemesis? If the movie was about Alice, and didnt go against the RE timeline, then it would be different.

    although something tells me that the movies would suck anyway, just cuz they arent very good...............................uuhhhhhh
  • kuroda

    kuroda  - 1 year, 5 months ago  - Report

    so ehm... is she getting naked in this one?
  • 510BrotherPanda

    510BrotherPanda  - 1 year, 5 months ago  - Report

    I say we wait until the rebooted Tomb Raider movies come out to flame hard.
  • batmanboy11

    batmanboy11  - 1 year, 5 months ago  - Report

    IMO the first movie was the best (so far) and was still crappy. Maybe Afterlife will be good, but I doubt it. I wish they would stop making these movies.
  • Zackaro

    Zackaro  - 1 year, 5 months ago  - Report

    EH HELLP GUYS!? Havn't you realised that the film makes alot more sence than this shite story of the game? Sure everyone said they loved resi 5, i even bought a friggin poster, then i finished the game and looked back. WHAT THE FUCK, Its a ZOMBIE GAME there are NO Zombies, if they are, then wtf is a zombie doing firing an ak47 very acuratly?!? Although the boss battles were sweet the story, and setting (why the f africa? -_-) was all in all shite. The film story to me is better because its much more realistic (even if the world is a desert, they explained it) and so what that alice is some super powered chick? i dont care. At least the MAIN Villian didnt die in some overly retarded magma lava super monster action not horror gay way. -_-

    SO IN THE END - The film story is better. The game story is dead since the end of resi 4....RAGE!
  • TheBoz

    TheBoz  - 1 year, 5 months ago  - Report

    The films are absolute crud. Very few games make it well into the silver screen, but I must admit, I did enjoy Hitman and to a lesser extent Max Payne. I love my action movies, my horrors, I really do, but the Resident Evil movies, I could not sit and watch it all the way through any of them. These movies are the type of movie you borrow a pirate copy and fast forward to anything that looks interesting, before you know it, you have drunk half a bottle of beer and looking for a retail copy of a DVD of another movie. Five words to describe this "actress'" ability and every single aspect of the films

    Stinking
    Horrid
    Ill-starred
    Trash (And in the Britney Spears sense of the word)
    Excrement
  • celticsfan645

    celticsfan645  - 1 year, 5 months ago  - Report

    how come at the top is says 30 dollar film. Clarify that crap
  • spaced73

    spaced73  - 1 year, 5 months ago  - Report

    the middle picture is a cenabite from the first hellraiser film,why?
  • ventanger

    ventanger  - 1 year, 5 months ago  - Report

    God these movies are so terrible. It's like they printed out the synopse of the games story, scrambled the pages around, and added in Alice.. f'ing Alice, a super powered invincible Mary Sue who can BEAT NEMESIS IN A FIST FIGHT. Oh yea, there's the "survival horror", when you forcibly inject a god-like alien whose only appeal is that she's easy to hang onto a wire harness. Independent movie my ass, you know they say the same thing about Terminator Salvation?!
  • NanoElite666

    NanoElite666  - 1 year, 5 months ago  - Report

    That guy in the last picture can't be Chris... His arms aren't big enough.
  • Spazerman

    Spazerman  - 1 year, 5 months ago  - Report

    i saw the movie last night. it wasnt exactly the best thing out there. they relied waaaayy too much on slow motion and 'bullet time' in pretty much every fight scene. half the stuff in there dont make sense at all because they just threw random stuff from the games in there i guess as 'fan service'. also borrowed so much stuff from movies like Matrix and Dawn of the Dead. just as a movie itself, it was ok. Resident Evil it isnt.

    ReCaptcha: From Fakerds
  • Clovin64

    Clovin64  - 1 year, 5 months ago  - Report

    Oh Meiks, your cutting edge sarcasm always makes me smile.
    So both Wesker and Chris Redfield are in the new movie? Is there a chance that Wesker will grow giant tentacles and shout "CCCCHHHHRRRRIIISSSSS!!!!!"
    Resi's dialogue makes me laugh.
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