Quantcast

101 MORE things we've learned from games

Because gaming's got a whole lot more wisdom to go around

Words: Matthew Keast, GamesRadar US

81. Boomerangs are in fact extremely useful tools and potentially deadly weapons, and not crappy toys that fall on the ground every time you throw them.

82. Performing a stunt in the middle of a race is not a dangerous and risky display of poor sportsmanship, but in fact allows you to go even faster.

83. Cars with official corporate logos on them are indestructible...

 

84. …generic rip-offs, however, will smash into a crumpled wad while hitting a tree.

85. If you’re in a life-threatening situation, try focusing really hard. You may experience a slowing down of time, or possibly a nice glowing color indicating danger or safety.

86. Shooting someone in the chest at point-blank range with a semi-automatic rifle may not kill them sometimes, but smacking them with the butt of the same rifle will induce death every single time.

87. You can walk down the street with a fully automatic weapon and not even get a second glance from the police.

88. All small electronics like radios, earpieces, and cell phones will work no matter how much water you swim through. Also, all guns, medicinal herbs, alchemic powders, paper documents, and explosives are equally waterproof.

89. A night in jail is usually enough to have your trial ready the day after, and even the worst crimes generally result in a small fine.

90. Hacking into high-security areas does not require extensive training and expertise, but rather the ability to solve simple shape-sliding or color-matching puzzles.

91. If a mayor wants to demolish someone’s house to put a big statue of himself there instead, it's perfectly acceptable to do so. In fact, it will increase the mayor’s approval rating from the adjacent home-owners.

92. As long as a military general kills more of the enemy than his own troops, he is considered an unqualified success.

93. You can behave like a psychotic a-hole one moment, and then lay on the syrupy love the next, and no one will think you’re crazy, or even remember what you said ten seconds ago.

94. It is a great idea to pick up random syringes off of vending machines and inject yourself to find out what happens.

95. 95% of all doors in the world are locked or jammed shut and cannot be opened by any conventional means.

96. Every conspicuously tall building in the Middle East has a hay-cart sitting directly under it, so feel free to dive off of every one.

97. In modern warfare, the only way to win is by advancing, because the enemy will never run out of troops otherwise.

98. Have fantasies of being a police officer, ambulance driver, fireman, or cab driver? Just steal one of the appropriate vehicles. No one at dispatch will wonder why their usual driver’s voice suddenly changed.

99. If you’re ever stuck in a burning building, find something red to wear. Red clothing usually denotes some measure of heat protection.

100. Every product in the world is priced in whole dollars. Pennies, nickels, dimes and quarters do not exist.

101. Death is never permanent. Even if it were, you could always just kill him.

Jan 2, 2009


101 things we've learned from videogames
The wisdom of our favorite pastime, applied to real life
 


101 game facts that will rock your world
Facts that mock you with their triviality

 

10 things we'd do with a real gravity gun
Mischief, murder and physics fun with Freeman's famous gun


 
103 Comments
Order Comments: Newest First | Oldest First
dahudge8  - 10 months 23 days ago 
- Comment removed by Community
Reported
dahudge8  - 10 months 23 days ago 
awesome article by the way, I lol'd
RonnyLive19881  - 10 months 23 days ago 
Anyone point out the numbers worth reading? I'm not going threw all 5 pages...
RonnyLive19881  - 10 months 23 days ago 
I hate the damn reCAPTCHA!
Taxtm  - 10 months 23 days ago 
"74. World War II was not won by numerous countries coordinating attacks across the globe, but rather by a single jack-hole with a gun. Said jack-hole’s identity varies depending on the source."

Out of curiosity, how many games have been made that revolve around WWII? I lost count...
ELpork  - 10 months 23 days ago 
62..ha.
TeragRunner  - 10 months 23 days ago 
I thought of one.
You can look in the direction your gun is pointing and no one will care if you pointing an automatic gun in their face.
TeragRunner  - 10 months 23 days ago 
Oh oops it was supposed to say

You can only look in the direction your gun is pointing and no one will care if you pointing an automatic gun in their face.
Airhead  - 10 months 23 days ago 
How about

If someone seems to be a friend he is an enemy, and vice-versa.

or

Shooting an enemy in the leg twice will kill him. HOWEVER unleashing 15 shotgun shells, 30 Uzi clips, 30 6-shot revolver rounds, 2 missles. 5 frag grenades, and 1 landmine on a buddy will not kill him.
camo510  - 10 months 23 days ago 
@ Airhead
lmao good one, agree 100%
camo510  - 10 months 23 days ago 
I have a few...

If you hold your breath u can hear your heartbeat and have perfect aim.

You can have hundreds of enemys after u at a time and will be able to handle all of them no problem

If u take damage and your view goes red just duck down and wait to return to normal

You can drive into a concrete lamp post and only take a few dents

You can be ejected 100 feet away from your vehicle and get up wihout a limp
Crossleft501  - 10 months 23 days ago 
haha I think 35 is my favorite
CptCHARLES  - 10 months 23 days ago 
How 'bout

If an enemy is slow than it is therefore strong, and if it is fast than it is weak.

or

In a zombie apocalypse there are military grade rifles lying(laying?) on tables.

or

If you are shot in the stomach with a shotgun, simply drinking a special beverage will heal any wounds completely.

or

If you take any damage just wait 5 seconds and you will be all healed up.

or

When the zombie apocalypse arrives every Joe Blow will know how to use and load an M16.

or

The coolest and most skilled buddy always dies in the end.

or

In WORLD war 2 only four countries were involved.

or

...that's it.
Defguru7777  - 10 months 23 days ago 
Here's one:
In RPGs, all eight people will conglomerate into one person, who can change his/her/it's appearance without plastic surgery equipment. Additionally, this does not count as getting laid :(
bamb0o-stick  - 10 months 23 days ago 
- If you are getting shot at by enemies around police, they will not help you. However if you fire back at your enemies, the police will join in attacking YOU as well.

- Getting gunned down, blown up, crushed, smashed and set on fire will not kill you. You'll wake up outside a hospital with all your possessions, but with a lighter wallet.

- Flying into Africa will give you malaria.

- There are always someone immune to a "zombie" -like epidemic. Good chance its you.

- All soldiers tend to look exactly the same. Don't ever look generic or you'll die first.

- Living in a hidden vault makes you a super-marksman who can pause time during attacks. You can also salvage a nuclear wasteland from being uninhabitable.
Tasty_Pasta  - 10 months 23 days ago 
Ahahaha! 38 is oh so true.
somthing42  - 10 months 23 days ago 
how about

drawing animal constellations in the sky will make the animal come down and give you magic powers.
Corsair89  - 10 months 23 days ago 
-You can clearly see vague lands and objects of in the distance but some invisible indestructable wall blocks you from advancing.
-If you and your entire existance looks cel-shaded, that means that the few beings who control your every move want other beings to experience your beautiful, artsy brillance but fail to convince the others about how great you are and are frustrated and blame the others in the fact that you won't be granted a 2nd adventure.
-If you are a boss, beware, because little pest that is trying to kill you kill see how much health you have left.
-Bosses are never EVER direct. They will attack in obvious, easily aviodable moves.
-If you get a boss half-way down on health, they will use a few new moves that are a bit stronger.
-There is ALWAYS music coming from seemingly nowhere and it constantly changes to fit the situation.
-You and everyone you know is shallow, has only one emotion, and is basically a walking steriotype.
-Someone you know will eventually betray you.
-Your ragtag group of warriors can single-handedly topple an empire.
-If your in an abandoned town that is perminantly fogged over, then don't worry because anything and everything that attacks you is only in your mind.
-Five colored buttons can make an infinite amount of guitar notes and chords.
-Pinatas are actually living creature. You barbarian.
-If your car crashes, explodes, whatever, it will perfectly be restored in seconds so you can continue racing.
-Ostriches can fly and are good for jousting.
-Everyone you kill will disappear shorty.
-The legends are ALWAYS completely true and you will eventually have beat the odds and overcome it.

-
Xizor14  - 10 months 23 days ago 
Funny as crap. I lol'd every time!
Xizor14  - 10 months 23 days ago 
I am so bookmarking this.
Related Games
Xbox 360
Xbox 360
Wii
Wii
PSP
PSP
PC
PC
Xbox
Xbox
R.U.S.E. Multiplayer Modes Announced N4G
PC News from N4G
Nov 26, 2009
Whole Lotta Discounted Love for the Early Birds N4G
360 News from N4G
Nov 26, 2009
Dragon Ball Raging Blast DLC Release List N4G
PS3 News from N4G
Nov 26, 2009
Join The ABP Beta N4G
PC News from N4G
Nov 26, 2009
Namco Bandai Games Releases Details of Upcoming... N4G
PS3 News from N4G
Nov 26, 2009