30 rules every RPG must follow

The perfect storyline outlined and spoiled

Here’s a quick checklist of what you should have: airship, completed paternal research, ancient artifact for destroying evil and epic armor/sword (found in a random chest along the way).

Once you have all these things, you’re ready to make your final assault and…


This darkworld or “underworld” is where you go to repeat steps one through twenty-eight one more time before the game ends. The new world will be similar to the regular world, but nobody in them wears bright colors and castles have all been built as mirror images of their regular counterparts.


Above: This is not the darkworld, but it looks like this. We just turned the regular world gray

Good, you've repeated everything and now, seriously, it's time to do battle with some ultimate evil in the Ultimate RPG. Get in your airship, plot a course for the Flying Fortress and, wait… what's this? A cutscene where you…


You met her in the first hour of the game, and it only took about 18/19ths of the game, but you’ve finally made your move. Way to go champ! Don't think for a second that her likely impending death played any role in this newfound passion whatsoever.

Head into the fortress and engage the embodiment of evil in physical combat. With all your experience it will be an awesome contest of button selection, but you can always reload right outside the room and try again. As you strike the final blow, you've finally defeated the villain, but somehow, he's still alive…


Fight him again. Don't fall for that second one – it's a trick. Alright kill him one last time. Congratulations! You can now say that you’ve beaten every role-playing game ever.

Mar 3, 2009

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