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10 of the most extreme controllers EVER

Gaming hardware creators have to stop playing it safe. So many of the common, mainstream videogame controllers released over the years are just watered-down, vanilla versions of the supreme greatness they really could be. They don’t inflict pain, get you high, cause intense public shame, stimulate your erogenous zones, or let you get your freak on in other ways. Fortunately, we found some that do. Welcome to the seedy underbelly of videogame controllers. Check your inhibitions at the door and brace yourself for some of the weirdest, most extreme and craziest gaming controllers and accessories around.


Boot Fetish Pong controllers

Have you been a bit naughty? Yes, we thought so. This kinky boot-fetish Pong controller will smack some sense into you. Devised by a British inventor with a taste for the bizarre, this masochistic two-player device lets you and a pal engage in a standard game of pong – by groping a stiletto-heeled black leather boot. Miss the ball, and you’ll have to taste the whip. Each point scored causes an electrical impulse to trigger a hearty whack to your opponent, delivered by a motorized riding crop. Nice.


Above: Photos from BBC News 

Oddly enough, this is quite possibly the least dangerous or potentially fatal of James Larsson’s peculiar DIY gaming inventions, which seem to frequently involve high voltages and other life-threatening hazards. However, if a moderate whack isn’t enough to deliver the punishment you so desperately desire, a “severity of whip” dial lets you up the dosage of physical discipline. Somehow, we think this one’s not likely destined for the mass gaming market any time soon.


Emotiv’s Epoc Mind Control Headset

These are not the droids you’re looking for. Well, not quite. Gaming’s future may very well become less of a hands-on experience and more of a minds-on activity, if the Emotiv corporation’s cool hardware venture is a success. The company’s freakishly cutting-edge, über-chic Epoc headset lets you control videogames with your thoughts and expressions. As weird as it sounds, it actually works. The headset device measures the electrical impulses from your brain as well as facial movements and translates that into control input that ties directly into games and computer applications. You may look a little funny wearing it, but who doesn’t want to be a virtual Jedi?

Imagine furrowing your brow and clenching your hand into a clawed fist to make your onscreen character leap forward and shred a foe to bits. Intense thought and minor physical movements, like pointing your hand to direct a rock to float off the ground and mentally willing it to do so, actually work in true Force-like fashion with the unit. It’s very cool, and has our minds racing with the limitless possibilities.


PediSedate

Hey kids, feel like getting loopy? Distraction, comfort, and sedation: we dig the motto. This unwieldy-looking plastic medical tool could very well make playing the old-school Game Boy actually fun again.

Essentially a strange cross between a pair of headphones and an underwater breathing snorkel, the PediSedate connects to any old Game Boy and delivers a steady stream of nitrous oxide to the patient/player while also monitoring respiratory functions. It was, and possibly still is, only really used in the pediatric offices of doctors and dentists to help kids stop from freaking out about getting poked and prodded, but imagine the potential recreational applications. Good luck getting your hands on one of these babies and a tank of nitrous to go with it, though.


The Paradox Mouse

What can you make out of old 9mm bullet shells, scraps of wood, various metal doodads, a few rusted gears, some electrical wiring, and the bones of one very dead rodent? The most badass steampunk PC mouse ever built, that’s what. This actual, working PC mouse was custom made by a highly talented steampunk hobbyist to match an equally insane computer monitor and keyboard he cooked up.

The grisly design incorporates the actual dried-out shoulder blades, tail bone, spinal column, and hollowed-out skull from a once-living mouse. For that extra-creepy vibe, the skull lights up in a demonic red hue from embedded LED lights. Now that’s our kind of PC mouse. Pro-tip: to make your own, you apparently have to soak the animal bone in warm water for a short time to soften the tendons and bend it into place. If medieval necromancers played videogames, this is how they’d pimp out their rig.


Rez Trance Vibrator

Ah, what an infamous little device. A special Japan-only version of Tetsuya Mizuguchi’s super psychedelic musical PS2 shooter Rez came packaged with a conspicuous, mouse-like USB peripheral that responds to the game’s heavy, pumping techno rhythms by vibrating copiously.

Delving deeper into the game, the music becomes more intense and dynamic; the Trance Vibrator’s throbbing power follows suit. Though its creator has gone on record stating the device was not necessarily intended for use in an adult manner, and that “you could put it anywhere - your foot, your back, your waist. It’s up to our customers’ imaginations,” the thing comes with a washable slipcover. C’mon now. We know why it wasn’t officially released by Sega in North America. Use your imagination.

Above: Or you can just try it for yourself with extra controllers on the Xbox 360 version 

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34 comments

  • BloodBarrage - December 15, 2009 6:41 p.m.

    I actually want to try out the Painstation but you have to be extremely drunk and blazed to do it lol
  • BloodBarrage - December 15, 2009 6:37 p.m.

    LOLZ AT THE VIBRATOR AND SPANKING ONE! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH I CANT BREATHE!
  • Persona - December 13, 2009 4:02 p.m.

    Europe, home of pain. Also it happens to be a tourist destination.
  • ilike2pwn - December 13, 2009 7:32 a.m.

    Steel Balls=Painstation
  • luke3107 - December 12, 2009 2:06 a.m.

    i want to face anyone at the painstation. so long as i can use my right hand. which has no feeling in it lol. I would be awesomely unbeatable at this, (until i died of blood loss or something lol)
  • jackthemenace - December 9, 2009 8:18 p.m.

    i actually REALLY want to try the painstation out xP
  • hardcore_gamer1990 - December 9, 2009 3:48 p.m.

    I really wanna try that Painstation >:] And that steampunk mouse... God I want that.
  • Dameon Angell - December 9, 2009 9:12 a.m.

    The Painstation is one of those things you gotta just try once for shits and giggles over a pint .. or two ... or three ..... or ... *falls* I must be drunk, cause here's my captcha: 20th-century kwangsi
  • CAPST3R - December 8, 2009 10:12 p.m.

    it's just typed my recaptcha in the post. that's just ridiculous. now i look stupid.
  • CAPST3R - December 8, 2009 10:11 p.m.

    put a bloody glove on in the painstation! i want an analogue stich bean bag, or an R1 couch. and a circle button table. and square button coasters... *continues this rant on MW2... on a PS3*bromley jerry
  • StoveToTheFace - December 8, 2009 12:15 p.m.

    PediSedate looks like some kinda SAW gimick heh.. the USB pleasure giver 2000 japan edition isnt suprising heh. thats the name i game it anyhow -) btw im a cyclops.. errm that vest thing looks cool, but i would hate to play any COD with it..i would be black and blue within 3mins with the bullets i eat online..heh
  • infern0 - December 7, 2009 12:39 p.m.

    I wanna play some megaman on that giant nes controller it looks brilliant
  • Spybreak8 - December 7, 2009 3:15 a.m.

    Man, is that Painstation the same system they used in that old bond flick, haha nah.
  • Doctalen - December 7, 2009 2:58 a.m.

    Holy shit the painstation sounds fun as hell. Think about it you and your friends are ether drunk or stupid and want to see who the best pong player is then you whip out that thing. The pedisedie looks awesome. Fill it up with some gaseous substances that make you whacked out seems awesome. Think about it your playing a video game and then getting high at the same time. Illegal but sounds like a woot.
  • lovinmyps3 - December 7, 2009 12:04 a.m.

    Holy shit the Painstation sent shivers up my spine!
  • WrathLord03 - December 6, 2009 12:47 a.m.

    I bet the Germans use the PainStation to prepare soldiers for Hitler's second Coming when he'll start World War 3. Another blatantly rascist comment from WrathLord03...
  • Xplosive59 - December 4, 2009 8:23 p.m.

    the painstation would be awesome if you were good at pong otherwise your prety much screwed if you used it, you know what they should do is put "i wanna be the guy" or "ikagura" on the painstation now that would be craptacularly loltastic!
  • haytradyl33 - December 4, 2009 4:44 p.m.

    No, I think Jigsaw probably designed the Painstation.
  • xenn - December 4, 2009 3:41 p.m.

    Did Jigsaw design the PediSedate? Because if so, I'll be excited to see the next Saw movie.
  • TRAVthe3RD - December 4, 2009 11:20 a.m.

    why avoid the painstation? if your good at pong it would be a riot watching your friends be inflicted with pain.. mwoo ha ha

Showing 1-20 of 34 comments

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