Getting reamed by a 2x4 isnt the only way to fall into a coma
There are two only two ways to truly fall into a deep slumber. The first, to get knocked out by an unseen assailant. The second, to succumb to the siren call of the tryptophan coursing through your blood as youre rocked gently to sleep in the aftermath of Thanksgiving dinner. And for that single solitary med student that reads this, you can just shut your hole, everyone already knows that tryptophan has little to no affect on the human physiology. Jesus youre always such a partypooper.
Samus Aran
What would she bring: Dinner rolls. Because, you know, she rolls.
How she would embarrass your family: By this point in her life she has a stomach of steel, so what seems like a good idea to share with the family may not actually be polite dinner conversation. Aka the evisceration of giant alien brains.
Cooking Mama
What would she bring: She brought the stuffing, sweet potatoes, spinach souffle, cranberry spread, grilled asparagus, green bean casserole, and steamed corn on the cob because who else would?
How she would embarrass your family: She wouldnt. Shes adorable. Unless they feel shame because all of her food is better than theirs.
Waluigi
What would he bring: Plastic forks and plates, because there always has to be that one asshole.
How he would embarrass your family: Him and your crazy uncle will get along like peas in a pod, and by the end of the night, both will be thrown out of the house for their inability to hold a tune despite their insistence on singing most--if not all--of Queens greatest hits.
