Skip to main content
GamesRadar+ GamesRadar+ GamesRadar+ The Games, Movies, TV & Comics You Love
Sign in
  • View Profile
  • Sign out
flag of UK
UK
flag of US
US
flag of Canada
Canada
flag of Australia
Australia
  • Games
  • TV
  • Movies
  • Hardware
  • Video
  • News
  • Reviews
  • Guides
  • Deals
  • More
    • PS5
    • Xbox Series X
    • Nintendo Switch
    • Nintendo Switch 2
    • PC
    • Platforms
    • Tabletop Gaming
    • Comics
    • Toys & Collectibles
    • SFX
    • Newsarama
    • Retro Gamer
    • Newsletters
    • About us
    • Features
Total Film
Gaming Magazines
Gaming Magazines
Why subscribe?
  • Subscribe from just £3
  • Takes you closer to the games, movies and TV you love
  • Try a single issue or save on a subscription
  • Issues delivered straight to your door or device
From$12
View
Trending
  • Prime Day Deals
  • Superman
  • Donkey Kong Bananza
  • Switch 2 stock
Recommended reading
The Alters gameplay screenshot showing
Survival Games After 10 hours of The Alters, I've been trapped in a Groundhog Day of mutiny and magnetic storms – and I fear even movie night can't save me
Prologue
Survival Games This super-hard survival game is the most unforgiving Steam Next Fest demo I've played so far, and I completely failed to get revenge for the last time it kicked my ass
Baby Steps
Open World Games I lost all my progress in a single catastrophic fall in this impossibly hard open-world Steam Next Fest demo, and I'm not even a tiny bit mad about it
Ratopia screenshot showing an underground base where rat citizens carry boxes down below
City Builder Games In this rat-filled city builder, one wrong move can change everything - and in my case it was forgetting to add a toilet
Helldivers 2
Games "We cough up a chunk of our soul": 32 game devs, from Doom's John Romero to Helldivers 2 and Palworld leads, explain what people get wrong about games
Vampire Survivors
Action Games Vampire Survivors kicked off a game development gold rush, but has a legitimately new genre emerged between the cash-ins?
Hollow Knight: Silksong
Action Games "SILKSONG IS IMMORTAL AND SO ARE WE": Desperate for answers, Hollow Knight Silksong fans are ritualistically banning mods in savage sacrifice to their fickle god Team Cherry
  1. Games

Gaming's unluckiest, doomed scientists

Features
By David Houghton published 12 April 2013

Consigning themselves to hideous fates. FOR SCIENCE!

When you purchase through links on our site, we may earn an affiliate commission. Here’s how it works.

Weird science

Weird science

In video games, much like in the mind of a religious fundamentalist, science is the root of most problems. Perhaps its because the sci-fi leaning fiction of video games and the conflict-driven set-up of most gameplay lend themselves so well to scientifically-generated threats. But whatever the reason, there are far more planet-threatening Doctor Wileys around than benevolent Doctor Lights. Even if not flat-out evil, the white-coats invariably end up on the recieving end of something nasty whether by accident or design.

So we decided it was time to pay tribute to these fallen heroes of science. And in the case of those who brought it on themselves, put the boot in while they're down.>

Page 1 of 11
Page 1 of 11
The UAC Mars research base - Doom series

The UAC Mars research base - Doom series

The unfortunate fate: Death by dismemberment, evisceration, plasma burn and shotgun shell, following demonic invasion. Oh, and possession too. Followed by more shotgun death.

Was it their fault? In the original games, not so much. If simple teleportation was grounds for Hellish retribution, the entire crew of the Enterprise would be nestled away in Satans lower intestine right now.

In Doom 3 though? The entire Martian facility is made up of such Comically Sinister Everything that its impossible to imagine anything occuring there could ever turn out 100% horror-free. Its perpetually gloomy. Everyone is terrified, depressed or losing their mind. Industrial accidents are ten a penny, disturbing noises drift down every corridor and the chief scientist is one Dr. Brian Elzebub*. Teleportation experiments in that place were only ever going to lead to one location, and Mr. Tumnus certainly wasnt going to be waiting at the other end.

*Okay so he wasn't really, but he might as well have been

Page 2 of 11
Page 2 of 11
Black Mesa - Half-Life

Black Mesa - Half-Life

The unfortunate fate: Death by interdimensional alien or government hit squad.

Was it their fault? Debatable. While the resonance cascade that opened the portal between Black Mesa and the Xen borderworld was a direct result of a risky bit of science-pokery, no-one could really have expected things to go as gloriously sideways as they eventually did.

The experiment was an attempt to discover the environmental effect of increasing the natural resonance of a crystal sample, but while it was probably a bit silly to carry out said experiment on a crystal of unknown origin, very few people in Black Mesa knew that the crystal was imparted by the G-Man. And even fewer knew who or what the G-Man was. In fact no-one does to this day. He does however, definitely have an agenda and his action was conducted with a very specific end goal in mind. Which we might find out the nature of in Half-Life 3. In around 2037.

Page 3 of 11
Page 3 of 11
Aperture Science - Portal series

Aperture Science - Portal series

The unfortunate fate: Death by deadly neurotoxin. Oh, and company boss Cave Johnson died of inhaled moon rock.

Was it their fault? Maybe not directly, but anyone who worked at Aperture Science had it coming. This is the company that developed a way to rip holes in space from what was originally a shower curtain. The company that thought the risk of destroying the fabric of the universe during time travel experimentation was basically nothing to worry about as long as you didnt make eye contact with your future self. The company that used hobos as early test subjects, took them apart, put science stuff in them and then sent them on their way. The company that built its testing area out of asbestos and gave its volunteers tumors so that it could test its tumor-killing technology.

In short, its the company that believed the chief question in scientific endeavour is not Why? but Why not? And upon asking that question. promptly ignored the several hundred perfectly acceptable answers. So if you worked there and thought that the activation of a sentient AI plant manager was anything like a good idea, then that neurotoxin had your name all over it. And why the Hell were you storing deadly neurotoxin anyway?

Page 4 of 11
Page 4 of 11
The Facility scientists - Goldeneye 007

The Facility scientists - Goldeneye 007

The unfortunate fate: Perforation by British secret agent and the destruction of their precious facility.

Was it their fault? Only if you apply the laws of action movies. ie. If you're not on Bond's side you're basically collateral damage. It was the '80s. It was Soviet Russia. There were probably only so many options for a high-ranking Russian chemical or rocket scientist looking for reliable paid work. Who can blame these guys for taking a government job at a secret chemical weapons facility? Hell, it's not like most of them probably even had a choice. Think about that the next time you nail poor old Dr. Doak in the face for poops and cackles.

Page 5 of 11
Page 5 of 11
Lester - Another World

Lester - Another World

The unfortunate fate: Teleported to the surrealisat landscape of a hostile grey alien world populated by rampaging great shadow beasts and laser-toting space fascists.

Was it their fault? So Lester was working in the lab late one night (clearly not heeded the words of Bobby Pickett) tinkering around with his particle accelerator. Lightning struck the accelerator and a few seconds later Lester was gone.

Lester didnt technically do anything wrong (at one point a computer monitor reveals that one of the systems shields is off, but its unclear as to whether this is a problem or not), but if hed just taken a step back and looked at the bigger picture for a second hed have seen that he had his head right in the physics-lions mouth. Working alone. On an experimental particle physics experiment. At night. During a thunder storm. Science fiction exists for a reason, people, and that reason is that its a field manual on how to not get teleported to the surrealist landscape of a hostile alien world. If Lester had watched more Outer Limits things could have turned out just fine.

Page 6 of 11
Page 6 of 11
The Umbrella Corporation - Resident Evil series

The Umbrella Corporation - Resident Evil series

The unfortunate fate: Zombification, mutation, being eaten by zombies and mutants, being frequently blown up.

Was it their fault? Yes, yes, a billion times yes. For decades, Umbrella has devoted all of its energies towards very little but making monsters. And as the old proverb doesnt go, He who makes monsters might take care lest he thereby be violently eaten by one. Or turned into one and then shot in the face with a rocket launcher

Page 7 of 11
Page 7 of 11
Harlan Wade - F.E.A.R.

Harlan Wade - F.E.A.R.

The unfortunate fate: Psychically exploded by his own, long-dead daughter

Was it their fault? Harlan Wade discovered that Alma was a powerful psychic when she was three years old. He immediately put her in the lab for testing. By the age of five she was miserable, angry, and lashing out in ways the research team couldnt control. Two days before her eighth birthday, Wade locked her in a containment vault, induced a years-long coma, and made her pregnant with her own DNA, twice, in order to kickstart a psychic solder program. Ten years after the second birth, he cut life support and let her die.

Yes, it was all his fault.

Page 8 of 11
Page 8 of 11
The scientists of Jetpack Joyride

The scientists of Jetpack Joyride

The unfortunate fate: Death via the medium of vertical high calibur weapons fire drilling a hole from skull to perenium.

Was it their fault? As endearing as they are, yes. JJ's hero, Barry Steakfries, used to work at the lab until he discovered they were planning to use their technology for evil. The scientists thought they'd got away with it, but they weren't aware of how antisocially badass Barry is. He could have just reported his previous employers to the authorities, but that's not the Barry Steakfries way. Instead he broke back in, stole the jetpack and started laying waste to the lot of them.

And those guys really did not hgelp their situation once the onslaught began. During an attack by machine gun jetpack, you do not run around a huge open corridor. You hide inside a very small room with very low ceiling and you stay there until the screaming stops.

Page 9 of 11
Page 9 of 11
Big Science - Splosion Man

Big Science - Splosion Man

The unfortunate fate: High-impact detonation at the hands of pyrogenic lunatic.

Was it their fault? Working on the basis that there's no such thing as a perfectly innocent secret underground facility, yeah, we'd assume that Splosion Man's presence is their own doing. You create a being with the power to explode at will, you make him a gleefully deranged arsehole, you get what you pay for.

And what you pay for is having the last words you ever hear be an inane hollar of "Loose meat sandwiiiich!", shortly before you're scorched clean off this mortal plane. It's not a dignified way to go.

Page 10 of 11
Page 10 of 11
Further research needed?

Further research needed?

So that's our list of the the most unfortunate ends to burgeoning scientific careers. But have we missed any? If there's any tragic scientific endeavour you think more worthy of inclusion, let us know.

And why not check out some of our similar stuff? Give Gaming's most magnificently murderous medical practitioners a go. And then maybe try out The science of Fallout: Part 1.

Page 11 of 11
Page 11 of 11
CATEGORIES
PC Gaming Wii-u Nintendo PlayStation Xbox Platforms
David Houghton
David Houghton
Long-time GR+ writer Dave has been gaming with immense dedication ever since he failed dismally at some '80s arcade racer on a childhood day at the seaside (due to being too small to reach the controls without help). These days he's an enigmatic blend of beard-stroking narrative discussion and hard-hitting Psycho Crushers.
See more Games Features
Read more
The Alters gameplay screenshot showing
After 10 hours of The Alters, I've been trapped in a Groundhog Day of mutiny and magnetic storms – and I fear even movie night can't save me
Prologue
This super-hard survival game is the most unforgiving Steam Next Fest demo I've played so far, and I completely failed to get revenge for the last time it kicked my ass
Baby Steps
I lost all my progress in a single catastrophic fall in this impossibly hard open-world Steam Next Fest demo, and I'm not even a tiny bit mad about it
Ratopia screenshot showing an underground base where rat citizens carry boxes down below
In this rat-filled city builder, one wrong move can change everything - and in my case it was forgetting to add a toilet
Helldivers 2
"We cough up a chunk of our soul": 32 game devs, from Doom's John Romero to Helldivers 2 and Palworld leads, explain what people get wrong about games
Vampire Survivors
Vampire Survivors kicked off a game development gold rush, but has a legitimately new genre emerged between the cash-ins?
Latest in Games
Far Cry 4 lead reveals a cut idea for enemy camps that would have completely changed the story: "I think that's where the fun of the whole genre might lie"
Link points a finger at the stand, channelling Ace Attorney's stance, in a screenshot from the Hero of Law mod.
27 years later, this uncanny "Hero of Law" mod makes The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time the game it was always meant to be: Ace Attorney
Diablo 4
Blizzard puts the nerf bat down, reaches for a dash of buffs instead, then says screw it and buffs literally every Diablo 4 class in the next update
FC 25
FC 25 Futties tracker adds 99-rated cards for Pele, Ginola and Mbappe
Destiny 2 Lightfall
"I am a husk, a shell, totally empty": In an act of MMO masochism, Destiny 2 team spends 84 brutal hours locked in a blind run of the Salvation's Edge raid, insisting on the Master difficulty I struggle with even after raiding for 10 years
Borderlands 4
Borderlands 4 narrative director reveals his biggest uncertainty, and looking at the script, yeah, I get it: "The crowd falls apart like that guy in the cube that gets cubed in the movie Cube"
Latest in Features
David Corenswet as Superman with Krypto the dog and a robot in the Fortress of Solitude.
James Gunn's Superman has finally found the cure to superhero movie fatigue: just make them more like comics
Abraham's Boys: A Dracula Story
New indie horror Abraham's Boys: A Dracula Story is Frailty meets There Will Be Blood with a haunting focus on family – and I have no complaints
Superman shows off his strength on the cover of Superman Unlimited #2.
Here's how to start reading Superman comics once you've seen the new movie
David Corenswet as Superman in James Gunn's Superman
Superman ending explained: your biggest questions answered on Lex Luthor, the Justice Gang, and what it sets up for the DCU
The Sims 4 Enchanted by Nature
After 16 years of The Sims 3, The Sims 4 Enchanted by Nature might just be the whimsical expansion pack that pulls me away from EA's iconic 2009 life sim for good
Superman
Every comic book character in Superman, listed in order of appearance in James Gunn's new movie
  1. Zion Wright grinds along a wooden balustrade in in Tony Hawk's Pro Skater 3 + 4's San Francisco level
    1
    Tony Hawk's Pro Skater 3 + 4 review: "A nostalgic, must-play hit for fans"
  2. 2
    College Football 26 review: “Thanks to rivalries and dynasty, this is the greatest show on turf”
  3. 3
    Mecha Break review: "This mech battler makes up for lacking customization with a varied roster that lets me live out my Evangelion fantasy"
  4. 4
    Death Stranding 2: On the Beach review: "This tarpunk delivery epic is more Metal Gear Solid than ever, for better and worse"
  5. 5
    Rematch review: "As with Rocket League, the just-one-more-game pull is magnetic"
  1. David Corenswet as Superman inside the Fortress of Solitude in James Gunn's Superman.
    1
    Superman review: "A triumphant reinvention and a promising start for the DCU"
  2. 2
    Jurassic World Rebirth Review: "An unscary sequel that needed a little more time in amber"
  3. 3
    M3GAN 2.0 review: "A bold sequel with a slightly underwhelming conclusion"
  4. 4
    28 Years Later Review: "Enough terror, splatter and suspense to satisfy”
  5. 5
    Predator: Killer of Killers review: "Great characters, thrilling action, and gorgeous Arcane-esque animation"
  1. Lee Jung-jae as Gi-hun in Squid Game season 3
    1
    Squid Game season 3 review: "A staggeringly excellent final season wraps up one of the greatest Netflix shows ever"
  2. 2
    Ironheart review: "A relic of Marvel's content-at-all-costs era"
  3. 3
    Star Trek: Strange New Worlds season 3 review: "The show's most assured run of episodes to date"
  4. 4
    Doctor Who season 2, episode 8 spoiler review: 'The Reality War' is "a mix of the good, the bad, and the truly baffling"
  5. 5
    Doctor Who season 2, episode 7 spoiler review: 'Wish World' is "an exciting and ambitious" start to the season finale, with hints of WandaVision

GamesRadar+ is part of Future US Inc, an international media group and leading digital publisher. Visit our corporate site.

  • About Us
  • Contact Future's experts
  • Terms and conditions
  • Privacy policy
  • Cookies policy
  • Advertise with us
  • Review guidelines
  • Write for us
  • Accessibility Statement
  • Careers

© Future US, Inc. Full 7th Floor, 130 West 42nd Street, New York, NY 10036.

Please login or signup to comment

Please wait...