Waynes World 2 (1993)
The Cameo: Charlton Heston
Why So Cool? It’s what we wish we could do in the middle of good movies that are spoiled by terrible actors. When Mike Myers asks a man for directions, he’s not happy with the Bad Actor who plays the part.
So he wheels in Good Actor Charlton Heston, who delivers his five lines with Shakespearean professionalism and spades of gravitas.
If The Whole Movie Had Been About Them: The Life And Times Of Good Actor would follow the superhero-like titular character, who sweeps in to save struggling movies with his polished delivery.
Glengarry Glen Ross (1992)
The Cameo: Alec Baldwin
Why So Cool? Because not just anybody can upstage the likes of Al Pacino and Jack Lemmon in their own movie.
But Hurricane Baldwin does it with (brass) balls, sweeping in to deliver a mad, energetic view of life that sees him big up capitalism, boast about his pricey car and debate, er, coffee. “Mission of mercy” indeed.
If The Whole Movie Had Been About Them: It would have been awesome. And a little bit smug.
Zulu (1964)
The Cameo: Richard Burton
Why So Cool? Because Burton doesn’t even need to appear on-screen to make an impact on audiences.
Here, he lends his voice to the film’s opening and closing moments, narrating those pivotal sequences with oodles of style. We get chills just thinking about it.
If The Whole Movie Had Been About Them: We’d really be watching Stranger Than Fiction .
Robin Hood: Prince Of Thieves (1991)
The Cameo: Sean Connery
Why So Cool? “We need,” director Kevin Reynolds no doubt thought as he prepped Robin Hood , “somebody really freakin’ awesome to appear as Richard the Lionheart here, somebody everybody loves, and somebody who’d make the coolest king ever.”
Enter Sean Connery. Who sounds like Sean Connery. And looks like Sean Connery. Which is all the cool we can take, frankly.
If The Whole Movie Had Been About Them: We’d have followed Richard the Lionheart on his crusades. Which would probably have been ten times more interesting than watching Kevin Costner go ten rounds with a British accent.
Hot Shots! Part Deux (1993)
The Cameo: Martin Sheen
Why So Cool? Ah, those Sheens, such jokers. And it’s good they have a sense of humour, considering their headline-filling lives.
Here, Martin pitches up in son Charlie’s starring vehicle, pastiching his infamous turn in Apocalypse Now and interrupting Charlie’s voice-over. Better still, as the duo pass on boats, they both yell to each other, “I loved you in Wall Stree t!” Classy stuff.
If The Whole Movie Had Been About Them: It’d be much the same – man it’s tough telling these Sheens/Estavez’s apart.
Game Of Death (2000)
The Cameo: Kareem Abdul-Jabbar
Why So Cool? Basketball player Abdul-Jabbar trades blows with Bruce Lee in the latter’s tragically unfinished martial arts movie (Lee died after filming Enter The Dragon , and only completed half of Game ).
However, what a final bow. Coming up against the towering (7ft 2in) Abul-Jabbar, their sparring is quite something to behold.
If The Whole Movie Had Been About Them: Abdul-Jabbar would star as a Jeet Kune Do contestant who has to fight for his right to, uh, fight when he’s deemed too tall to enter a local competition.
The Expendables (2010)
The Cameo: Bruce Willis/Arnold Schwarzenegger
Why So Cool? The other expendables may be, yeah, pretty expendable (Stath and Lundgren, it’s called acting, yeah?), these fellas certainly aren’t.
The coolest thing about the entire film, their macho positing in a mere minutes-long scene is what Expendables should have been for its whole running time. Fingers crossed for the sequel, which promises to beef Willis’ cameo up to a starring role.
If The Whole Movie Had Been About Them: Expendables 2 , anyone?
Maverick (1994)
The Cameo: Danny Glover
Why So Cool? Nod meets wink, as Lethal Weapon co-stars Mel Gibson and Danny Glover encounter each other in this countrified romp.
Gibson’s gambler bumps into Glover’s bank robber, they shoot each other a shocked stare of vague recognition, then carry on with their business. Lethally funny.
If The Whole Movie Had Been About Them: We’d depart Gibson’s storyline, and follow Glover’s crook instead. Even if he is gettin’ too old for this shit.
The Dead Pool (1988)
The Cameo: Guns N’ Roses
Why So Cool? It’s rock stars on the loose! Slash shows up Clint Eastwood by firing a harpoon gun, then the band as a whole pitch up at the funeral for fictional rocker Johnny Squares.
If The Whole Movie Had Been About Them: Axl Rose plays a retired assassin who decides to bring the team back together for one last job – and masterminds a scheme where they pose as rock stars to bring down a rival mobster.
Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story (2004)
The Cameo: Chuck Norris, Lance Armstrong
Why So Cool? Two cool as heck cameos here, as two heroes give our underdog leads a break that gets them to the finishing line.
First, cyclist Lance Armstrong pitches up to give Vince Vaughn an unwitting pep talk (“what are you dying from that’s keeping you from the finals?”) before Chuck Norris thumbs up and ensures the team win big.
If The Whole Movie Had Been About Them: Chuck and Lance are trapped in a gladiator arena and have to fight to the death. We'd watch it.
Hairspray (2007)
The Cameo: John Waters
Why So Cool? The master of bad taste simultaneously thanks the remake producers for their royalties check, and injects a bit of filth into their re-do by appearing as a blink-and-you’ll-miss-him flasher during the film’s opening number.
Cool because Waters manages to be gross and funny no matter what he does. Now that’s standards.
If The Whole Movie Had Been About Them: The Flashdance remake as starring John Waters would be quite a departure from the original.
Curse Of The Pink Panther (1983)
The Cameo: Roger Moore
Why So Cool? Moore shrugs off his suave Bond thing to play a bumbling British twit here.
Speaking in a daft French accent and seeming to have an inner ear problem that means he’s completely unbalanced, he’s a resident of a health spa run by Joanna Lumley’s countess. Double-O who?
If The Whole Movie Had Been About Them: He’d be a star foil for Mr Bean, as the two attempt to out-idiot each other in a series of ridiculous skits.
Pulp Fiction (1994)
The Cameo: Christopher Walken
Why So Cool? Walken could read a pizza takeaway pamphlet and still make it sound like a Tarantino rant.
Which is pretty much what he does here, cropping up to deliver a fellow prisoner’s gold watch to his family, alongside some cracking dialogue.
If The Whole Movie Had Been About Them: Actually, we fancy this for Tarantino’s next. Walken behind bars, where all you can do is talk and fight. Yes, please.
Young Frankenstein (1974)
The Cameo: Gene Hackman
Why So Cool? “Where are you going? I was gonna make espresso!” Hackman makes a brief appearance as a blind man who helps Frankenstein’s monster by feeding him up.
Cool because it’s not often we get to see Hackman bothering the funny bone so brilliantly anymore.
If The Whole Movie Had Been About Them: Hackman's comi-tragedy would find the blind man attempting to do right by others, but getting himself into all sorts of fixes - most comically during a trip to Loch Ness, where he mistakes the monster for a giant fish that he wants for his tea.
Cannonball Run II (1984)
The Cameo: Frank Sinatra
Why So Cool? Proof that even dreadful movies somehow have the pulling power to draft in heavyweight awesome.
Sinatra’s brief appearance in the second Cannonball Run lifts the entire movie from utter rubbish to solid gold. Sadly it goes back to utter rubbish once he departs.
If The Whole Movie Had Been About Them: He'd be a mob lynchpin, handing out cash to those who need it - at a heavy price.
Monty Pythons Life Of Brian (1979)
The Cameo: Spike Milligan
Why So Cool? Because it was the result of a joyous coincidence, with the MP guys discovering that Milligan was holidaying in Tunisia, near their shoot, and drafting him in for a cameo.
He’s barely distinguishable from the crowd of people who decide to follow in Jesus’ footsteps by surrendering one of their shoes – until they all depart, leaving him standing alone.
If The Whole Movie Had Been About Them: Milligan would play a travelling prophet who begins his own religion, Steveianity, and watches as it spirals out of control.
Mallrats (1995)
The Cameo: Stan Lee
Why So Cool? It’s the first time Lee made a cameo – something that’s now become something of an annual event thanks to the success of Marvel movies.
Back in the day, though, this was an ingenious concept dreamed up by Kevin Smith. None of Lee’s cameos have come close since - though his turn as Hugh Hefner in Iron Man is a near second.
If The Whole Movie Had Been About Them: We’d be in biopic territory, as we burrow into the life of the man who set up Marvel. Actually, why hasn’t this been done yet? Richard Jenkins for Lee, say we.
High Fidelity (2000)
The Cameo: Bruce Springsteen
Why So Cool? If only Bruce would crop up in our bedroom with some sage words of advice, perhaps then we could make something more of our lives.
Instead, he just appears to John Cusack, strumming out a little ditty while uttering little pearls of wisdom. Thanks boss.
If The Whole Movie Had Been About Them: The star would be a friendly spirit who takes the form of a person’s idol in order to help them turn their lives around. Think a cooler fairy godmother.
Network (1976)
The Cameo: Ned Beatty
Why So Cool? Up there as one of the best movie monologues in the history of all time, Beatty puts in a five minute performance that not only devastates the entire movie, but earned the actor an Oscar nomination.
His eulogy as a money-grabbing studio executive packs ten different varieties of cool. Breathless stuff.
If The Whole Movie Had Been About Them: He’d be the star of Wall Street 3: TV Vs. The World.
Pirates Of The Caribbean: At Worlds End (2007)
The Cameo: Keith Richards
Why So Cool? So Johnny Depp puts word about that he based his Jack Sparrow performance on rocker Richards… the least you can do is turn up in a cameo as his pa for the third Pirates adventure.
And aren’t we glad he did? Richards oozes rock charisma, all craggy and gruff in black eyeliner and pirate garb. Perhaps the coolest pirate ever to sail the high seas. Apart from Sparrow, of course.
If The Whole Movie Had Been About Them: Now there’s an idea. Richards definitely deserves his own 18-rated adventure, as he journeys into the dark heart of piratedom – with lots of ladies hanging off his arms.
The Blues Brothers (1980)
The Cameo: Aretha Franklin
Why So Cool? It’s a mark of just how brilliant Dan Aykroyd and John Landis’ film is that it could draft in so many musical greats. Twiggy, Chaka Khan, Ray Charles and, uh, Steven Spielberg all show face in this classic.
But they’re nothing compared to Franklin, who sets the diva free as a tempestuous café owner who lets out a belting number.
If The Whole Movie Had Been About Them: We’d be in musical heaven, as Franklin dreams of a better life through numerous catchy music numbers.
Zoolander (2001)
The Cameo: David Bowie
Why So Cool? Because nobody else could possibly judge a walking contest quite like the White Duke.
When Zoolander and Hansel decide to have a “walk-off”, Bowie jumps in to decide who’s crowned the winner. We wish this would happen in real life.
If The Whole Movie Had Been About Them: It would follow Bowie’s endeavours in becoming a model – except he’s only interested in becoming a female model…
Kill Bill: Vol. 2 (2004)
The Cameo: Samuel L. Jackson
Why So Cool? Tarantino couldn’t make a movie without Jackson appearing in some capacity, so he slots the cool cat into the Bride’s wedding scene as musician Rufus.
Clouded in smoke, shot so that he only ever appears in the very corners of the frame, he’s one smokin’ dude. “If they come through Texas, I done played with them,” he sasses. We done believe him.
If The Whole Movie Had Been About Them: Rufus: The Player would follow the titular music man as he crosses America making beautiful sounds and killing those on his death list.
The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie (2004)
The Cameo: David Hasselhoff
Why So Cool? No-one hassles the Hoff! Except animated sea crustations by the name of SpongeBob and Patrick.
We love a good send-up, and Hoff isn’t above taking a dig at himself, slipping back into his Baywatch shorts for the first time in four years. Don't scoff at the Hoff, the man rules.
If The Whole Movie Had Been About Them: It’d revolve around the Hoff’s attempts to be a fullblown country crooner. Or something.
Annie Hall (1977)
The Cameo: Marshall McLuhan
Why So Cool? It’s every man’s dream to do this. Allen’s nervous Alvy gets into a ruckus with a man in a cinema queue over McLuhan’s work.
In response, Alvy conveniently brings McLuhan himself in to set the other man straight. If only we could end all pub arguments like this.
If The Whole Movie Had Been About Them: It’d be a documentary about McLuhan’s media theory married with his attempts to meet the girl of his dreams.
The Greatest Story Ever Told (1965)
The Cameo: John Wayne
Why So Cool? Duh, it’s John Wayne! The Duke turns up in this epic bible re-enactment as a Roman Centurian who spears the side of Jesus Christ.
He may only get one line (“Truly, this man was the son of God”), but for just a single day’s work he was paid a princely $250,000. He’s just that cool.
If The Whole Movie Had Been About Them: The centurion would have turned into a gun-blazing, history-trouncing hero, rescuing Jesus from carrying the cross and saving him from crucifixion.
Waynes World (1992)
The Cameo: Robert Patrick as T-1000
Why So Cool? Not only is it Mr Patrick, it’s Mr Patrick in his most iconic/cool-as-ice role, still searching for John Connor… and accidentally accosting Mike Myers instead.
In short: really, really funny.
If The Whole Movie Had Been About Them: Uh, see Terminator 2: Judgement Day.
Lifeboat (1944)
The Cameo: Alfred Hitchcock
Why So Cool? Hitch was unbeatable when it came to well-placed cameos, slotting himself into every one of his films in one form or another. He solved the problem of appearing in Lifeboat – a film set entirely on a boat – by cropping up in a weight-loss newspaper ad. Master, we bow down to you.
If The Whole Movie Had Been About Them: The ad in the paper would have held the clue to the stranded boaters’ survival - e.g, shed those pounds.
The Muppet Movie (1979)
The Cameo: Orson Welles
Why So Cool? It’s Mr Orson Frickin’ Welles, self-righteous king of the thesps himself, trading lines with a bunch of flustered, bug-eyed puppets! Proof that even the most seasoned of serious trrrrained actors can take the Michael out of themselves every once in a while.
If The Whole Movie Had Been About Them: He’d have been struggling with his latest Shakespeare adaptation, and drafted in a few fluffy friends to fill various parts. So Kermie as Othello, Ms Piggy as Desemona and Rizzo as Iago.
Zombieland (2009)
The Cameo: Bill Murray
Why So Cool? Murray makes a crowd-pleasing appearance as himself in this tongue-in-cheek zombie end-of-worlder, cleverly hiding out in plain sight by dressing himself up as a zombie – “suits my lifestyle, you know. I like to get out and do stuff.”
In the process, he even apologies for Garfield . Now that’s cool.
If The Whole Movie Had Been About Them: It’d be The Walking Dead meets The Bill Murray Show , a hand-held documentary following Murray’s endeavours to survive the undead takeover.
