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The Top 7... Worst games of 2011 (so far)

Last month, we selected the seven best games of the year (so far) and, although only halfway through 2011, the competition was already intense. Many outstanding titles had to be cut and many editors’ feelings had to be hurt.

But that was the easy part. Now comes the true torture – the week in which I reluctantly delve into the dank, dark sewer that is the bottom of Metacritic’s review rankings to bring you the extreme opposite end of the spectrum. For every Portal, there’s a Party Megamix. For every Zelda, a Thor. These are their shameful stories...


7) 101-in-1 Sports Party Megamix

Platforms: Wii / DS
Average Review Score: 41%

What the press release promised: “Simple to play, hard to master, and utterly addicting, these games will keep players engrossed in competing head-to-head with friends, scoring goals, earning medals, winning races, and beating high scores. There is practically no end to the fast-paced sports action!”

What the game actually delivered: Read a little further in the press release and this bullet point has your honest answer: “Tens of hours of pure fun.” Yes, even with such a stupid number of minigames stuffed into one supposedly generous package, the PR person – whose job is to hype and exaggerate – didn’t feel comfortable going with “hundreds of hours” instead of “tens.” Probably because nothing included here is worthy of more than a minute of your time, or of more than a single play. The activities may range from the mundane (bowling, darts) to the exotic (hang gliding, scuba diving), but the controls inevitably boil down to the same boring button combinations.


Special acknowledgement for that foul mouthful of a marketing-driven title as well, which could only encapsulate the laziness and cynicism of Wii and DS’s third-party library better if it also managed to squeeze the words “baby” or “pet” in there somewhere.

The nicest thing anyone had to say: "The Wii does shovelware better than anyone.“ – NGamer UK

The most scathing review quote: "The archetypal example of a game released to cash in on the unsuspecting parent or grandparent.” – DarkZero


6) Wipeout: In the Zone

Platform: 360
Average Review Score: 40%

What the press release promised: “Utilizes technological advances in gaming to break down the living room walls and put gamers into a truly authentic recreation of thrilling television.”

What the game actually delivered: You know, Wipeout on Kinect sort of does provide an accurate representation of the TV show – both are built in a way that guarantees players will fail again and again and again. While the real-life obstacle course is purposefully designed to deliver as many hilarious and humiliating pratfalls as possible, however, the videogame version is just poorly designed. Period. It has trouble recognizing the most obvious of motions, often translating jumps into ducks or frantic running into standing still. And when you tumble into the water (which will be all the time)? Unlike the show, you’ll also hear the same announcer joke again and again and again, complete with stuttering audio quality.


The nicest thing anyone had to say: "Mercifully brief.” – Game Informer

The most scathing review quote: "I have no clue how this got past the testing phase to be a full price retail release.” – Gaming Age

Topics

Top 7

47 comments

  • Sjoeki - July 19, 2011 9:32 p.m.

    If you ask me Homefront deserves a spot on this list
  • Metagross - July 13, 2011 2:43 p.m.

    @rancid92 IGN YOU MAKE ME LAUGH . The most bias editors on the planet and you actually posted one of their reviews up here ? IGN IS THE MOST BIAS SITE ON THE PLANET . ALL HAIL GR!!
  • NubberzTheHedgehog - July 13, 2011 4:52 a.m.

    I have played both wii and ps3 versions of thor. The wii version is kind of fun but the ps3 version makes me want to give up on life.
  • D0CCON - July 13, 2011 12:16 a.m.

    For those who don't know why certain games are missing, it's because the list is put up in order of lowest Metacritic ratings.
  • waitingforCharlietosnap - July 12, 2011 11:36 p.m.

    Sweet sweet sweet, always love these Top 7s. And I demand Charlie on TDar as well!
  • BoondockSaint54 - July 12, 2011 10:45 p.m.

    Wow. Duke Nukem looks terrible on the DS. I'm actually suprised it looks like a 1995 era PC. Brings back memories of my Tandy
  • rancid92 - July 12, 2011 6:58 p.m.

    That's weird, IGN actually liked Wipeout. They gave it a 7!
  • EwoksTasteLikeChicken - July 12, 2011 6:48 p.m.

    I've never played any of these, so that's probaly a good thing. Also, looking at Duke Nukem: Critical Mass made me feel sick and I don't know why.
  • ReasonableFanboy - July 12, 2011 6:31 p.m.

    Holy Christ. How could they ever even let that Duke game out into the world? It's an abomination, is what that is.
  • Tomsta666 - July 12, 2011 5:29 p.m.

    Swap out Duke Nukem Critical mass for Duke Nukem Forever and you've got yourself a list!!
  • ObliqueZombie - July 12, 2011 4:29 p.m.

    It's times like these where I'm glad some games are left out of my knowing. You can usually tell when it's gonna be a bad game, just by the trailer. *looks at a random exploding building, then looks away* "Yeah, our game has that."
  • scaler2000 - July 12, 2011 12:51 p.m.

    @Epyon_761 dont you know there are no girls on the Internet silly? :P
  • Crypto140 - July 12, 2011 12:31 p.m.

    Just make Ape Escape 4, without motion controls. Please.
  • rxb - July 12, 2011 12:03 p.m.

    Its a shame I think the wipeout and ape escape games could have been good if they were done right.
  • jmcgrotty - July 12, 2011 10:06 a.m.

    Wow. Look at all those motion controlled titles! (Yes, I realize they aren't ALL motion control titles. But 5 of the 7 are motion control/touchscreen titles) And seriously, can someone translate "derp daderp derp" for me? What the fuck does that mean?? From the context it was used in, I can't even guess what they were implying. (PS: If I'm posting multiple times, I'm sorry. Browser acting screwy.)
  • jmcgrotty - July 12, 2011 10:06 a.m.

    Wow. Look at all those motion controlled titles! (Yes, I realize they aren't ALL motion control titles. But 5 of the 7 are motion control/touchscreen titles) And seriously, can someone translate "derp daderp derp" for me? What the fuck does that mean?? From the context it was used in, I can't even guess what they were implying.
  • jmcgrotty - July 12, 2011 10:04 a.m.

    Wow. Look at all those motion controlled titles! (Yes, I realize they aren't ALL motion control titles. But 5 of the 7 are motion control/touchscreen titles) And seriously, can someone translate "derp daderp derp" for me? What the fuck does that mean?? From the context it was used in, I can't even guess what they were implying.
  • philipshaw - July 12, 2011 9:38 a.m.

    I always enjoy this Top 7 more than the best games one, I know someone who bought the Thor game
  • jackthemenace - July 12, 2011 9:05 a.m.

    Y'mean... there's something WORSE than Duke Nukem Forever...!?
  • kor2disturbed - July 12, 2011 8:36 a.m.

    Critical Mass looks awful...Duke Nukem Forever was worth the 9.97 I paid for it, (I rented it)

Showing 1-20 of 47 comments

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