Timey-wimey, wibbly-wobbly gifts
Dr. Who fans - Whovians, if you will - have half a century of pop culture to sort through. The BBC powerhouse is absolutely stuffed with characters, planets, costumes, nifty gadgets, and vehicles that fans would risk a time paradox to get their hands on. Don't act like you don't want your own Sonic Screwdriver.
And the choices are more plentiful than a nursery full of Adipose, so I've sorted through the muck and found some true gems every Whovian should have on his or her shelf, starting with...
Dr. Who Season 8 on Amazon Instant Video
I'm starting with the obvious. If your favorite Whovian hasn't watched the latest season with the brilliant Peter Capaldi (The Thick of It, In the Loop), then this is a priority - and shame on them. You can fix their error by grabbing every episode on Amazon Instant Video. Mummies, bandits, dinosaurs, and Cybermen are waiting.
Disappearing TARDIS mug
The pulsing, the whooshing, the vanishing is there anything cooler than watching the TARDIS take off? Believe it or not, you can capture some of that energy with this awesome TARDIS mug. Hot liquids make the Doctor's iconic blue blox disappear from the London street on one side and reappear in deep space on the other. No word on whether or not it makes your morning coffee bigger on the inside.
So you want to buy the TARDIS mug? Great, but you'll need something to actually steep your hot drinks in first. This teapot will take care of that. Now if only we can find a nice chafing dish to preparing fish fingers and custard...
Dalek ice cube tray and chocolate mold
No matter how far he travels, the Doctor can't escape his greatest enemies, the Daleks. Known as the evilest beings in the universe, their almost-trashcan design strikes fear into the hearts of many an alien. But with these trays, you can actually make cooling ice cubes and delicious chocolate molds in those imposing shapes. It's a good way to warp your room temperature beverages into a cooler state or exterminate your cocoa cravings. Apparently they're also good for making tiny cakes too - terror has never been so yummy.
Bassett's Jelly Babies
You can mold your ice cubes and chocolate treats to resemble some Whovian shapes, but if you want to actually snack like the Doctor, you'll need Jelly Babies. These tasty little candies are the favorite of the Fourth Doctor, and old scarfy has a great palate. I reckon they're much tastier than 12's fish fingers and custard too.
Essential Guide to 50 Years of Doctor Who
The Doctor has changed faces over a dozen times during his 50 years on television. Some Whovians prefer the classic era, some stick with the new series, and perhaps one loner out there even prefers the 90s TV movie. No matter what camp you fall into, you owe it to yourself to learn about the show's rich history. This handy guide will bring you up to speed - but don't think of it as some boring textbook! The guide focuses on the production design of the series, with hundreds of gorgeous screenshots and captions.
The Essential Guide covers a lot of series history, but what if you want to get into the nitty gritty of Doctors, companions, and quirky alien species? Allow me to show you this character encyclopedia. Fair warning: it was written during the Matt Smith era, so no War Doctor or 13th Doctor here - but it still holds more than 200 entries, so there's still plenty to discover!
Trivial Pursuit: Doctor Who Edition
So you've read up on all things Who in the Essential Guide and encyclopedia. Now is the perfect time to show off all of your new found knowledge. Trivial Pursuit: Doctor Who Edition will be your ultimate test. There are 600 questions to quiz you on episode plots, characters, famous lines, and whatever else the trivia masters decide to throw at you. Hint: pretty much every character has yelled 'run' at some point.
Monopoly: Dr. Who 50th Anniversary Collector's Edition
Monopoly works for just about any fictional world out there, but this Dr. Who 50th Anniversary Collector's Edition truly shines. The pawns? Icons like the Fourth Doctor's scarf, Seventh Doctor's umbrella, and Twelfth Doctor's bow tie. The railroads? Four different versions of the TARDIS interior. The properties? Classic episode titles. With a board this cool, you might actually finish a game of Monopoly.
TARDIS string lights
They're not just for the holidays - these string lights can add a timey-wimey vibe to any room. The 9-foot cord comes with 10 lights, but you can totally daisy chain multiple sets around the room for complete TARDIS coverage. Why have just one blue box when you can have 10?
TARDIS table lamp
Maybe you want something more practical than string lights. I suggest this decorative TARDIS table lamp, with artwork featuring the 11th Doctor and companion Amy Pond. 'Practical' doesn't mean boring, by the way - the TARDIS base actually lights up and makes the iconic engine noises. I'm not an expert on photonic physics, but I bet the bulb burns brighter on the inside too.
Splashed TARDIS messenger bag
Boy, this sure is a lot of merchandise. Where should you put it all? Why not pack it into this gorgeous messenger bag? This isn't some boring off-brown satchel or beige backpack - this is the TARDIS drawn in an awesome splash art style in portable form. Yes, the bag is probably bigger on the inside, and yes, that's the third time I've used that joke. Maybe I'm funnier on the inside.
Cyberman Vacuform mask
Could your Dr. Who cosplay need a little upgrading? Don the imposing face of a Cyberman with this screen-accurate mask. You'll become one of the Doctor's ever-reappearing enemies without losing what makes you human.
11th Doctor instant cosplay kit
If your buddy is impersonating an evil Cyberman, you're gonna need to fight back Get your cosplay on with this replica fez and bowtie. No, it doesn't include the brown suitcoat, but that shouldn't phase you since Smith only ever said the hat and the tie were 'cool'. It's not some cheap clip-on tie, either - it's a wrap-around.
Remember at the beginning when I said, "Don't act like you don't want your own Sonic Screwdriver?" Well, you can totally get one. If you want the practical tool of the 10th Doctor, you can get it for about $20. If you want the 11th Doctor's redesign - it still won't work on wood - you can get it for nearly the same price. No door can stop you now!
Off on another adventure
I'd love to stay and chat, but the Doctor and I have to run off and solve some crisis on the moon. You wouldn't understand. Leave a comment and I'll read it when we get back from saving the universe!
Craving more of the Doctor? Check out these Doctor Who Series 8 updates.