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An earlier version of this article was posted on this website in 2012.  Also, Dave's now-ex girlfriend is still confused by game terminology. He tried his best.

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76 comments

  • praysolace - August 5, 2014 8:04 p.m.

    Wouldn't most people see "sprite" and think clear soda?
  • QuickSticks45 - August 5, 2014 2:52 p.m.

    Great fucking article, Good job Dave
  • chirpy420 - July 12, 2014 2:06 a.m.

    Collision Detection: to gamers, the game mechanic which governs when one object hits another- To non-gamers: looking at a the result of a fender-bender
  • thetrellan - July 7, 2014 8:04 p.m.

    Never heard of lidonarrative, and I know people in the gaming industry (which is how I know about things like sprites, another thing gamers might not know but game makers know all about), so I wouldn't guess that most gamers would know this. I also think kill screen and battery backup are stretching it, as everyone knows what to call the BSOD (Blue Screen Of Death), and memory cartridges are not battery powered. A battery backup is still an actual battery, guys. UPS would have been better, though that's more to do with computers in general than just PC gaming. UPS, so you all know, means Uninterruptible PowerSupply- a battery backup for your desktop system.
  • Reaping_Glory - July 2, 2014 2:49 a.m.

    a lot of these i didn't know. And i never use the term energy bar, i just use "health" or "mana". And for Game Mechanic, i would've thought the non-gamer term meant someone who fixes errors in games?
  • gridwerk - May 12, 2014 11:46 a.m.

    CAMPER: in-game its someone who sits in one spot and waits for you to wander by to receive your headshot. IRL its someone who sits in one spot waiting for you to wander by and receive your s'more. SPAM: In-game its an attack comprised of a bunch of mostly anything: grenades, gunfire, spells or just mashing a button. IRL its a potted meat product in a can that can often contain mostly anything: lips, holes, ears, twigs, crushed mice, small bits of bone, glass, some kind of jelly... GIBBED: IRL- to fasten (parts) together by means of a gib. In-game is quite the opposite: to unhook or unfasten all the parts of a player/characters body parts typically with a grenade, wall mine or rocket launcher. NERF: IRL its a delightful bit of foamy fluff shaped like more dangerous things- swords, bullets, axes, etc. In-game its when your delightfully more dangerous things are reduced to the effectiveness of bits of foamy fluff in order to make the game "fair" for the following... NUB: IRL its defined as a small piece or chunk in-game its someone who is new (also known as a n00b etc), inexperienced and useless who inevitably gets your raid party reduced to small bits and chunks. TEA BAG: IRL: A bag containing tea leaves dipped into hot water for the purpose of a lovely beverage mostly consumed by the British. In-game: A bag containing your "boys" mostly consumed by Nubs.
  • Berretxz4t4 - March 10, 2014 8:58 p.m.

    Damn it Dave, your best wasn't good enough!
  • rxb - November 17, 2013 4:59 a.m.

    Still funny second time through. I'd like to add Rag doll physics.
  • GOD - November 15, 2013 1:52 p.m.

    Can someone tell me how many entries in GR list articles have had Yoko Ono? I'm thinking by now it's at least a few...
  • injustice45 - November 14, 2013 4:19 p.m.

    Grand Theft Auto Gamers: A very, very popular video game franchise. Non-gamers: Stealing a car, motor vehicle theft.
  • brickman409 - November 14, 2013 10:58 a.m.

    I thought of the soda Sprite when I think of the video game term sprite. I didn't even know there was a mythological creature called a sprite
  • Sinosaur - November 14, 2013 6:31 p.m.

    You clearly need to up your nerd dictionary by playing some D&D.
  • fattoler - November 14, 2013 10:10 a.m.

    Rush: A strategy involving attacking rapidly with units or players at an early point in a game using surprise or shock tactics to gain the advantage. To a non-gamer: When you're in a hurry or that new film about F1 Drivers.
  • Sinosaur - November 14, 2013 6:33 p.m.

    As a gamer, I still just think of the Canadian band. Video game rushes usually have a qualifier in my mind like Zerg Rush or Rush mode.
  • Satchurated - November 14, 2013 9:19 a.m.

    Sky box: I thought of the great seating arrangements at sport stadiums Sprite: c'mon eveybody thinks of the soda!
  • ethan-reed - November 14, 2013 9:09 a.m.

    Matchmaking: Gamer- A mechanic in multiplayer lobbies dedicated to finding the best game for you to join based on level, skill, etc. Non-gamer- Some type of online dating service. Great article! I really laughed at level grinding and energy bars. Keep them coming!
  • Sliet - November 14, 2013 4:37 p.m.

    Well, truth is, in both scenarios the word still means the same, to match people together, but to which end is something else I suppose!
  • ethan-reed - November 14, 2013 5:50 p.m.

    True! But I doubt most gamers are looking for romance in a Call of Duty lobby. :P
  • virofglacies - November 18, 2013 5:42 a.m.

    Then why do so many people tell me they're going to fuck me, and hard?
  • ethan-reed - November 22, 2013 9:39 a.m.

    I said most gamers...

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