A new Deus has dawned, a day of augmented cyber soldiers and gruff, goateed blokes stabbing each other with rulers. Yep, there's a brand new Deus Ex game on the way. It's called Mankind Divided, and it's great. Well, probably. It certainly looks good. The last game in this illustrious series, 2010's Human Revolution garnered plenty of praise for its inventive gameplay and amusing array of gadgets. These so-called 'augmentations' allowed users to tackle their objectives in almost any manner they saw fit - with the obvious exception of those damnable boss battles.
Still, these 'augs' were pretty damn great, oftentimes feeling more like traditional superpowers than feasible, albeit highly futuristic technologies. The difference between the two is that one day we may very well see the latter in action. All the toxic goo in the world isn't going to grant you powers, but mad-eyed Mr. Science just might. So, what on earth are we going to do with all of these abilities? Help one another? Hah, this is humanity we're talking about. I'll bet we're going to utilise these sci-fi marvels the same way we use everything else: moronically. Here's just a few examples
What it's actually for - Handling tense negotiations. The social enhancer allows agents to subtly read and react to their target's non-verbalised intent. Optional pheromone release creates a more suggestible enemy.
How we'd misuse it - Convincing people to buy time-share condos and shady pyramid schemes.
Typhoon Explosive System
What it's actually for - Cluster bombing an agent's immediate vicinity, thereby preventing them from being overcome.
How we'd misuse it - Massively overreacting to the threat of wasps.
What it's actually for - Reducing minute bodily movement, allowing for a steadier aim when firing a weapon.
How we'd misuse it - Hustling pub patrons out of their hard earned cash.
What it's actually for - Arm-mounted stabbing weapons, capable of eliminating numerous targets quietly.
How we'd misuse it - Pushing ourselves up in bed.
Increased Carry Capacity
What it's actually for - Lugging around large amounts of mission-vital kit. Improves the strength of cybernetic arm prostheses.
How we'd misuse it - Hording huge quantities of useless tat/ carrying all 20 bags of shopping in at the same time (without inadvertently amputating your fingers).
Radar Mark & Track
What it's actually for - Keeping track of troublesome guards/ pinpointing a particular target. Ties in to cranial and visual enhancements.
How we'd misuse it - Obsessively stalking your ex/ crying deeply.
What it's actually for - Temporarily masking an agent's movements. Users are rendered effectively invisible.
How we'd misuse it - Pretending to be poltergeists, re-enacting the ending of Ghost.
What it's actually for - Non-audible verbal communications, grants live access to mission handlers, and all without giving away an agent's location.
How we'd misuse it - Gossiping and/or thoroughly badmouthing the person sat next to us without their knowledge.
Last Known Location Marker
What it's actually for - Displays the enemy's forecast of an agent's last known position.
How we'd misuse it - Keeping track of our house keys and/or wallet.
Icarus Landing System / Sentinel RX Health System
What it's actually for - Prevents injury from falling/ heals other wounds.
How we'd misuse it - Repeatedly throwing ourselves down the nearest staircase, for kicks.
What it's actually for - Spotting mission-specific resources and/or enemies, allowing an agent to effectively see through obstacles.
How we'd misuse it - Filthy voyeuristic escapades. Not me though...
Throw Heavy Objects
What it's actually for - Shifting heavy objects/ creating impromptu barricades.
How we'd misuse it - Hurling loved ones into the deep end of a swimming pool.
What it's actually for - Creating unconventional entry points, allowing the agent to outfox an entrenched opponent.
How we'd misuse it - Knocking down derelict houses/ accidentally destroying listed buildings. Generally costing the local council a fortune.