The Evolution Of Amber Heard

Girlfriend after girlfriend after girlfriend. We check out Amber's range.

Friday Night Lights (2004)

The Film: The trailer said it was "one of the greatest sports movies of all time."

Starring Billy Bob Thornton, Friday Night Lights follows the struggles and successes Permian Panthers football team.

It's set in a town brimming with racial conflict with an economy that's dying on its arse. These poor townsfolk need their team.

The Role: Amber plays Maria - it's a really tinsy role, but considering the fact that the bulk of her previous experience consisted of bit-parts and a brief cameo in The O.C ., we'll give her a break.

Amber Nectar: It was on the set of Friday Night Lights that she realised she'd found her calling in movies. Lucky old us, eh?

Drop Dead Sexy (2005)

The Film: Drop Dead Sexy starred Jason " My Name Is Earl " Lee and Crispin Glover. It didn't do very well in cinemas, largely due to the fact that it's absolute balls.

Granted, it's balls with a few minor laughs and interesting performances (although, if you're one of those people who finds Jason Lee annoying in Earl , he'll reeeeally get on your tits in this film. Avoid it).

The Role: Amber plays Candy. Can you guess Candy's profession?!

If anything, this part was even more measley than the last one. But we do like her in that pink thing.

Amber Nectar: Here's a fact: Amber is fluent in Sign Language. Like, wow!

North Country (2005)

The Film: North Country is the tale of Josey (Charlize Theron)'s feminist struggle against a bunch of Minnesotan meatheads.

Poor Josey's bullied at her workplace, the male-dominated iron mine. She doesn't take it lying down.

The Role: Now we're talking. This is where our Amber started turning heads.

She's surprisingly convincing as a young Charlize Theron, playing Josey in her teenage years. And golly, that woman's had a bleak life.

Amber Nectar: It'd only been a year since her film debut, but things were looking up for the teenage Texan...

Alpha Dog (2006)

The Film: Alpha Dog is all about what happens when you get too big for your boots.

A group of middle-class Californian kids enjoy waving guns around and dealing drugs. It all goes horribly wrong when they kidnap the 15-year-old Zack, whose brother owes money. Turns out they've bitten off more than they can chew.

We'd say "poor Zack", except that his life seems to turn into one long party. It's a "fun" sort of kidnap.

The Role: Amber is Alma, a blonde floozie who's part of a threesome with Zack in the swimming pool. See what we mean about the "fun" kidnap?!

Amber Nectar: Amber purrs one of our favourite quotes from the movie: "Have you ever been laid, Stolen Boy?"

Yeah. Poor, poor Zack.

All the Boys Love Mandy Lane (2006)

The Film: Well, all the boys do love Mandy Lane. But it turns out that some love her more than others.

On a weekend trip to a remote ranch, her would-be suitors start dying, one by one.

It turns out there's one admirer who wants her all to himself.

Well, it shows commitment, at least.

The Role: In her first ever lead role, Amber plays Mandy, who's dangerously popular among the boys.

Amber Nectar: Here's another fact: in real life, the ranch used in the film belongs to Hilary Duff's family! Well there you go.

The Beautiful Ordinary (2007)

The Film: Also released as Remember The Daze , plot of comedy-drama The Beautiful Ordinary takes place over a 24-hour period, in the last day of high school in 1999.

Like most American high-school movies, all the kids are beautiful, well-off and bored. We, however, were just plain bored.

The Role: Amber is Julia, your average high-school fitty. She isn't very likable, but then, she's part of a nice big ensemble cast, so you don't have to put up with her for long.

Amber Nectar: This was director Jess Manafort's debut film. She hasn't done anything since.

Never Back Down (2008)

The Film: Described as " Fight Club for teens", Never Back Down is more like like One Tree Hill with punch-ups.

It's set in Florida, where new guy Jake is trying to settle in to life in a world of money, parties and underground fighting.

When his family and friends are threatened, Jake must train for the fight of his life. Expect a montage.

The Role: Baja Miller is conflicted. Her boyfriend, Jake's nemesis, is an absolute tosser, and she kinda likes Jake. What emotional turmoil she must endure.

Amber Nectar: When this film was released, Amber was ranked #21 on the Maxim Hot 100 list.

Pineapple Express (2008)

The Film: The makers of Superbad cast Seth Rogan and James Franco as a couple of stoners who get caught up in proper crime.

The title refers to a particularly potent strain of marijuana that gets them into a whole heap of trouble.

The Role: Amber plays Angie, Dale (Rogan)'s girlfriend. Angie is only 18 and at high school, though she's probably more mature than Dale.

Amber Nectar: Nobody really understands how, or why, they're going out. Dale explains it's because "she's very mature for her age".

Which is true, because Amber was 22 when she made the film.

The Informers (2008)

The Film: The Informers is set in 1980s L.A., where the rich lounge around taking drugs, having sex and rolling up the sleeves of their shoulder-padded blazers.

It's how we imagine life would have been like if Wham! and Duran Duran had lived together in a big mansion, throwing pool parties every night and getting off their tits.

The Role: Christie gets around a bit, but it's OK, because she's well-off and glamorous, so she can't be a proper tramp.

Amber Nectar: Amber has a naked sex scene. We can't imagine why it was a box office flop.

Zombieland (2009)

The Film: The world is under threat from climate change. But there's a far more pressing danger. Zombies have taken over the Earth.

And they're speedy zombies (a phenomenon explained as something to do with mad cow disease. That's scientific enough for us).

It's very gory, very stylish and very funny.

The Role: Known only as "406" (her apartment number), Amber is Columbus (Jesse Eisenberg)'s stupidly hot neighbour, whom he batters over the head with the lid of his toilet tank.

Amber Nectar: Apparently, the director Fleischer was inspired to make Zombieland after watching Shaun Of The Dead . Which, we think, is lovely.

The Stepfather (2009)

The Film: Poor Michael has just returned from Military school to find out that his mum's shacked up with a psycho.

Of course, he can't say he's a psycho, because everyone'll just think he's weirded out about having a new daddy.

The Stepfather is out this week. We'll let you know whether or not it's worth the ticket.

The Role: Oh, look at that. Amber's playing another peripheral girlfriend character. Meaty.

Amber Nectar: She's only really been on the big screen since 2004. So, has Amber really evolved at all? We'll let you decide.

But we think the answer's probably no.