Super Star Wars is the original trilogy via Google translate

Lots of Star Wars fans get irate at the various tweaks and additions made over the years to the original trilogy, but bad CG and worse music have nothing on the Super Star Wars games' retelling of the saga. These SNES games pit you against a sarlacc monster within the first 10 minutes, and by the third game, you're chain-whipping Jabba the Hutt until he explodes.

To celebrate Star Wars: Episode 7 - The Force Awakens, we've put together a little primer of the original trilogy, as retold by the Super Star Wars games. We'll also be streaming Super Star Wars December 22, at 3:30pm Eastern, so you can enjoy this bizarre alternate history of Luke and his heroic quest to murder every Jawa in real time.

I don't know about you, but suddenly Han shooting second doesn't seem quite as ridiculous.

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