The Hills Have Eyes II review

In 1985 Wes Craven shot himself in the foot with The Hills Have Eyes Part II, a shoddy sequel remembered (if at all) for its dirt bikers vs mutants plot and ludicrous use of dog flashbacks. Twenty-two years later, the writer/producer nearly does it again with this not-so-brutal, not-so-nasty follow-up to last year’s blood-red, pitch-black remake. Sticking a bunch of National Guardsmen (and gals) back in the desert, it’s a dimmer, dorkier mutant half-cousin several times removed from Alexandre Aja’s brutality. Helmer Martin Weisz plays it all for yuk-yuk-yuks, the “Gomer Pile” grunts several IQ points behind the retarded mutants as they re-enact Southern Comfort in them thar hills and mineshafts. Fingers in brains, thumbs in eyes and sledgehammers in the balls are straight outta Tom & Jerry: this time the hills are alive with the sound of larfing.