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The Top 7... games that don't deserve nostalgia

Honestly, they were never that great in the first place

Words: Brett Elston, GamesRadar US

 

The entire Super Star Wars trilogy is garbage. It is today, and it was back in the '90s. Just because tech had evolved to a point where we could have legit LucasFilm sound effects and MIDI representations of John Williams' legendary score doesn't mean the rest of the game was as impressive as the SNES architecture. Levels don't make any sense; "send a barrage of enemies flying from all angles while the platform Luke's standing on falls apart" isn't competent level design. Compare any of these platformers to even so-so games of the day and there's a clear difference.



Ooo look, a wampa! Doesn't that look fun, flipping in circles over and over while an uninspired attack pattern plays out? Hell no it doesn't. And despite this boss being stupidly easy, the rest of the game is infuriatingly difficult thanks to the aforementioned cascade of projectiles constantly assailing Luke, Han and Chewbacca. But, even though every aspect of the trilogy seems like it was designed by a friggin' cackling mad scientist, people look back and think "ah, what a great series of games."

Balderdash! Flimshaw! They're junk, and half-decent snow speeder level isn't enough to keep our fuzzy memories intact. We let nifty graphic and sound tricks cover up the fact the games themselves were both boring and amateurish.

Want to soak in some more awfulness? Take a gander at Empire, perhaps the most troublesome, confusing, "what the hell is going on?!?" game in the series.


 
7 Comments
key0blade - 2 months 21 days ago
I wish I had FFVII...
tehperson123412 - 1 month 26 days ago
and yet, gr wonders why there are 100 reasons to hate them...
Corsair89 - 1 month 17 days ago
Whatever. I still love FFVII.
ryzuku - 1 month 9 days ago
I thought FFVII was alright, and I love good RPGs, especially ones with good stories. But, I never understood why so many people held it in such high regard. I just didn't really enjoy it that much.
tehperson123412 - 1 month 10 hours ago
never mind my comment. shoulda actually SEEN the 100 reasons to hate gr. but still it's pretty hard to get away with a list like this
Stinger911 - 6 days 5 hours ago
Final Fight?! And then the article writer continues to blaspheme against one of the greatest genres of all time: the beat 'em up! Repent! Repent, blasphemer!
mrbutlertron - 4 days 15 hours ago
Some of those beat 'em ups were hella fun to play with a sibling or friend, but there's a reason Turtles in Time was 25 minutes long. There wasn't a whole lot of variety.
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