What on earth would Tom Clancy do if the world suddenly decided to stop all the hostility and, y'know, everyone just tried to get along? No more trouble hotspots, everyone being the best of chums? Luckily for him there's more chance of a Spice Girls reunion, so those Rainbow fellas will probably be storming embassies years from now, storing extra ammo in their Zimmer frames. Ought to prove amusing when it comes around. But, for now, they're still in their prime and gagging to have another pop
Have you ever had that dream? You know, the one where you're running down a hill really fast, and then suddenly the ground disappears from beneath you and, by jiminy, you're flying! Except you're not flying, you're falling, limbs flailing uselessly as you plummet. Then you wake, drenched with sweat.
Perhaps it's just us. Anyway, Rallisport Challenge 2 has plenty of moments like that. Except for the waking-up bit. You're piling up a hill at blimey miles per hour and your strangely calm and
Well, pilgrim, in this world, there are two types of people - those who have guns, and those who dig. Or maybe those who like third-person shooters and those who don't. Either way, we don't think it's nice, you laughin'.Ahem. Sorry. This isn't working, is it? We were going to do this entire review in a Clint Eastwood voice, because that's so obviously what Rockstar have in mind for Red Dead Revolver - a gritty homage to the Man With No Name. Since 'acquiring' it from Capcom, they've polished it
When a game insists on titillating us with a cute heroine and knicker flashes three times a second from the start, we generally get out the Crap-O-Meter and give the thing time to warm up. As ever, the readings shot off the scale, but with Nellis busy playing Miami Vice nearby ("I love it, but I'll never know why!") and Pete and Hoody locked in an intense game of Ludo, we had to give the game more of a fighting chance. And, wouldn't you know, it was worth it. The first level, you see, is about