Gamers and critics alike let out a gasp of horrific glee when Resident Evil 4 kicked in the GameCube's door back in 2005. The fast-paced, over the shoulder splatterfest revitalized a franchise, considered by many to be in the same state of living decomposition as its undead antagonists. And it proved to the world that the Nintendo's system wasn't just for kiddies and fanboys. So our hopes are high that the upcoming Wii port will have the same "maturing" effect on the system, as well as silence the console's detractors.

All the context specific actions that take place should open up a bevy of options for the Wii remote. Imagine physically pushing off ravenous hellspawn, pointing your infrared scope at a Regenerator for an ultra-accurate kill, or holding the nunchuk and remote to your eyes, making twisting motions that simulate infantile sobbing because the jarring cutscenes have caused you to soak your pants with piss. Seriously - keep it together, pussypants.

Above: Don't expect the Wii version to incorporate the PS2's Blur-O-Vision

The RE4 port will offer all the features found on the upgraded Playstation 2 version, including new costumes, the P.R.L. laser weapon, a five-part documentary, and the multi chaptered minigame Separate Ways. Let's just hope Capcom doesn't pull a Prince of Persia: Rival Swords on us, charging full price for a game you can already play on the Wii with a Gamecube controller.

For further proof that the Wii is Evil's preferred place of residence, Capcom also released information on Resident Evil: Umbrella Chronicles, albeit in a bizarre and futuristic language that a majority of Americans can't read. The trailer appears to tout that this will be the momentous occasion where the Umbrella Corporation is finally brought to its knees. So what does this mean for future Resident Evils? Can you even continue a saga of the bloodthirsty undead without a megalomaniacal pharmaceutics empire? Is a Wii light gun redundant? We'll find out more later this summer.

April 6, 2007