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Mario Party 8


The worst games that made it to number one

A look at the suckage that has stained the top spot

Words: Matt Cundy, GamesRadar UK

 
Hit number one: 8 December 2007
Platform: Wii
Game Rankings average: 67.4%

Certainly not a terrible game. But worthy of number one acclaim? Definitely no. Still, as the first game to feature the plumber and hedgehog together - and cashing in on Olympic fever - it's little surprise that it hit the numero uno big time. For two weeks.

 
Hit number one: 30 June 2007
Platform: PS2
Game Rankings average: 64.9%

Released in the same week as The Darkness, Rainbow Six: Vegas and Resident Evil 4 on the Wii. It outsold them all and stubbornly parked its ass at number one for four weeks. Sometimes there just isn't enough sick in the world.

 
Hit number one: 14 April 2007
Platform: PS2
Game Rankings average: 64.2%

The only thing rattling about inside this particular half-shell is a crusty, pale turd of a game. Designed by grown-ups who obviously think teh kidz are stupid, it was stuffed excrementally with all the challenge of a pencil sharpener.

 
Hit number one: 7 May 2005
Platform: PS2
Game Rankings average: 64.1%

Proof that Star Wars fans on both sides of The Pond will suck up any old suckage that Lucas shovels in the general direction of their suck holes. Not the game we were looking for, but it still burgled the top spot for four weeks. Noooooooooooo...

 
Hit number one: 4 March 2006
Platform: PS2
Game Rankings average: 62.7%

The UK is officially mad for football. Even when it is no longer football but a big saggy onion bag full of stick-flickery, button-hammery, corporate urban cool combo messery. It held on to number one for three weeks despite challenges from Fight Night Round 3 and Ghost Recon Advanced Warfighter. Go figure.

 
Hit number one: 1 December 2007
Platform: PS2
Game Rankings average: 60.6%

Even a brilliant advert in UK daily rag The Sun featuring two topless hotties and a Ferrari couldn't stop this being the most not good Need For Speed ever. The PS2 version scored the worst in reviews. But sold the best in shops.

 
Hit number one: 26 March 2005
Platform: PS2
Game Rankings average: 60.5%

Like FIFA Street 2. Only worse. And with added MC Harvey. So, much worse.


Hit number one: 4 August 2007
Platform: PS2
Game Rankings average: 57.4%

Like a pair of shagging Autobots stuck mid-transform, this sorry excuse for a game was an absolute mess of indiscernible bits. And it had the bloody cheek to displace Pokemon Diamond from number one. Thankfully, balance was restored to the universe when BioShock kicked its stupid metal face off the top spot three weeks later.

 
Hit number one: 5 May 2007
Platform: PS2
Game Rankings average: 53.8%

Yet another movie tie-in scooped straight out the crapper and dumped at number one. Evidence that would suggest that there's a contingency amongst the UK's game buying masses are a clueless bunch of egg sacs suffering from a severe case of imagination deficiency. We weep.

 
Hit number one: 2 June 2007
Platform: PS2
Game Rankings average: 51.5%

It's official. 2007 was the year when every under-cooked and over-crapped movie game had a go at fingering the chart's most holy of slots.

Jan 28, 2009

Best parts of crap games
Redeeming rays of light in sloppy software



GamesRadar's Anti-Awards 2008
All of last year's most brilliant crappery


 
67 Comments
Order Comments: Newest First | Oldest First
Ramen_Soup  - 10 months 4 days ago 
Fantastic 4 was actually number one?? That game sucked so hard. Interesting article by the way.
jacob_kreed  - 10 months 4 days ago 
This is proves one thing, the consumer knows far more than reviewer, 60 percent for wii play. Its like giving Halo or GT a bad review...Learn from your mistakes reviewers.... What would be very cool to ask us what we think of the reviewers that review out of 10.
Corsair89  - 10 months 4 days ago 
More proof that people will buy anything. I hate ignorant casual gamers.
Over1imit  - 10 months 4 days ago 
Agh, Dirge of Cerberus was so...
Squeenix has disappointed the fans with that horrible spin off...
pestonio  - 10 months 4 days ago 
Don't forget that a lot of people buy Wii play because of the Wiimote you get with it not for the game itself. Plus it's the parents buying the movie games for their kids...
"little Timmy loves Harry Potter so I'm sure he'll love the game too..."
Z-man427  - 10 months 4 days ago 
is it really any surprise that people will buy shit like this? not so much
hardcore_gamer1990  - 10 months 4 days ago 
I brought Spiderman 3, but with good reason. Spiderman 2 was a decent movie tie in and i thought they'd stick to the formula. *sigh*
SlicedCarrot  - 10 months 4 days ago 
Should I be ashamed that I bought the star wars game?? In my defence I didn't enjoy it. =(
somthing42  - 10 months 4 days ago 
The sad part is that i owned 6 of these games. *sigh*
bernie10  - 10 months 4 days ago 
i totally agree with corsair
Taxtm  - 10 months 4 days ago 
@somthing42: I know what you mean. I owned five, sold them all less than a week after purchase, but then my sister bought Mario Party 8. I hate that game so much, but it's not mine to sell, and she won't stop begging me to play it! That game, along with her damn HSM Sing It game are EVIL!
H2A2I00  - 10 months 4 days ago 
i know this me just baking up so horrible decisions i made wen i was little but fantastic 4 was a OK multiplayer game
Cwf2008  - 10 months 4 days ago 
Hey Mystery Dungeon Blue Team wasnt that bad. And sure Wii Play was absolute crap, but at least it had a free Wii Remote in it...did anyone else get the game for the game itself, or just for the remote? Didnt think so

Lol ReCAPTCHA: Gates discretion
TeragRunner  - 10 months 4 days ago 
@Taxtm
Wow that's gotta suck.I'd claw my eardrums out if I had to listen to someone play HSM.
misfit119  - 10 months 4 days ago 
@cwf: That's the only reason that Wii Play has sold so well and it annoys me. We should call it a Wii Remote with a free Wii Play rather than the other way around. That would be more accurate but then Nintendo couldn't tout successful video game sales figures on that title.

Uh... ReCAPTCHA: Frozen scum
Red  - 10 months 4 days ago 
Psh, Diddgy Kong Racing was the shit when I was a kid. It was number one for a while for a good reason.
Sycomycole  - 10 months 4 days ago 
i had no idea that any of these games even sold.
Because i hate almost all of these games
twishart  - 10 months 4 days ago 
I own none of these. Fuck yeah!
Crossfire66  - 10 months 4 days ago 
I especially like how Gamesradar itself gave a few of these relatively high scores and then calls them shit. Obviously a majority of them suck hard but it seems a little hypocritic to say tell viewers they're decent and then afterwards say they suck.
SlightlyBetterName  - 10 months 4 days ago 
I'm seeing quite a bit of pokemon on this list.
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