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The Top 7... Games where you play as food

Be careful what you eat, you might be digesting the saviour of the universe

Words: GamesRadar UK

Food is great. It's tasty, satisfying and it stops us from dying. But the life-preserving talents of the world's scoffables aren't limited to simple nutrition. Oh no. Since the dawn of (videogame) time, food has been fighting, racing, rescuing and defending its way through quest upon quest, saving days and rescuing damsels all over the place without a single thought for its own use-by date.

And you thought it just sat there in the cupboard, idly waiting for its demise by your eager mouth? Then let us fill you in on the most notable sweet and savoury saviours of gaming.

After more than two decades of increasingly-curmudgeonly jadedness, we're still frequently boggled by the kind of nonsensical branding that publishers tend to think comprises a sure-fire gold license.

Batman makes sense. He's hard as granite-tipped diamond, cooler than a nitrogen cucumber, and has more awesome toys than Hamleys. M&M's on the other hand, are small pieces of chocolate. Not only is their single jaw-dropping super-power the ability to melt in your mouth, not in your hand, they can't do so much as even move, except from bag to mouth. Via your hand. Unsurprisingly, their games are a big fresh slice of poop pie, and none moreso than Kart Racing on the Wii and DS, a racer so sluggish that it seems designed almost entirely around that latter property of its protagonists.

 

It's more than he deserves. Seriously.


 

While Mario and Sonic were ruling the console-based 2D realm in the '90's, the neighbouring province of European home computer gaming bowed to the unquestioned leadership of Dizzy the egg. The thick-shelled platform adventurer romped triumphantly through countless games from Codemasters' (yes, they of GRID fame) old-school factory of digital joy, securing himself a permanent legendary status amongst misty-eyed C64 nerds.

He even achieved the semi-believable feat of managing  to pull off sampled speech on the humble Spectrum a couple of times. It sounded rubbish of course, but at the time it melted our minds.

Fried platform game heroes are the core of a nutritious breakfast. Go to work on a Dizzy.


 
46 Comments
Order Comments: Newest First | Oldest First
RabidCabbage  - 6 months 15 days ago 
Thanks for an amusing article. I'm actually hungry now...
AyKKon  - 6 months 15 days ago 
Ha ha ha! Very funny! And....oh! First.... post by me in this amazing site!
drprofessor  - 6 months 15 days ago 
Great article. What about the adventures of cookies & cream?
Sounhds like food and rabbits are delicious. WIN/WIN
MacGyver1138  - 6 months 15 days ago 
You Brits and your food combinations! Pardon my xenophobia, but beans for breakfast?
helix92  - 6 months 15 days ago 
Ha Ha. Awsome article. And beans for breakfast is great. But this article has made me hungry. I want a sandwich know
Tomsta666  - 6 months 15 days ago 
Dizzy and Alfred Chicken, nostalgia!!
It probably would of made me hungry but I just ate :D
oryandymackie  - 6 months 15 days ago 
Playing as that tofu would be great, I mean, if Capcom put that into Dead Rising aswell then you could turn up the stereo, and go on as I like to call it "RAMPAGE!!"
jamminontha1n2  - 6 months 15 days ago 
That chicken looked gross. I hope it was colored green and red for christmas. Otherwise, I am sure that that meat is not safe to eat.
Unoriginal  - 6 months 15 days ago 
I think I'm gonna go grab me a sandwich now.
Awesomeitude1523  - 6 months 15 days ago 
I played the Alfred the Chicken games!! Ah, so many memories. And i did always wonder what Toad tasted like. nice article.

Recaptcha: hypes mass pole....... nice
hardcore_gamer1990  - 6 months 15 days ago 
I used to love Kid icarus... :D
FrozenImplosion  - 6 months 15 days ago 
i love the pics :D
WonsAuto  - 6 months 15 days ago 
You guys are really reaching today, but you're pulling it off! Class article.

ReCAPTCHA: ripeness $3.25

Lol, that's appropriate for the article.
darkvare  - 6 months 15 days ago 
lol at least a kid enjoyed ninjabread man
Lord_Muboblis  - 6 months 15 days ago 
Technically, any game where you play as an animal would be on this list.
derringer83  - 6 months 15 days ago 
"They didn't feel a thing. Honestly. It was quick."

pretty much sums up why I come here.
Hobojedi  - 6 months 14 days ago 
Speedy Eggbert?
garnsr  - 6 months 14 days ago 
Ah, Eggplant Wizard. Irritating bastard, but cool.
TheCrimsonChin  - 6 months 14 days ago 
cool as a nitrogen cucumber

god im hungry
GoldenMe  - 6 months 14 days ago 
Ugh, eggplants.
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