The Truth Files: You can go to Hell for lying as well as stealing...

"Astonishingly fast, amazingly life-like and expertly tuned, unrivaled racing perfection" - Le Mans 24 Hours, PS2
- Whatever you say, Mr Trump. Wanna remind us now that you also have the most incredible, amazing, nucleo-bestest haircut in the world?

 "Phat Graphix" - Super Bust-A-Move 2
- We're actually not here to mock the "street" language. Rather, we wish to point out that this is a Bust-A-Move game bragging about its graphics. How "phat" can a TV filled with cartoon bubbles really look? It seems that someone actually thought we'd read that line, look at the crappy screens, and say, "Now, this next-level eye-candy is the reason I bought a PS2!" That person should be fired. From a cannon.

"Hours will seem like minutes as you try to surpass your (or your friend's) best score." - Tetris Worlds, PS2
- We've included this rather boastful entry just for the hokey of it. It's totally true of course, but just seems too damn haughty. We can quit anytime we want, honest. After this game.

"By popular demand, play as a mighty Dwarf!" - Dungeon Siege II: Broken World, PC
- All right: it's conceivable that this one is indeed factually accurate. But if it is, who the hell demanded the right to play as a stinkin' dwarf?

Above: When creating box copy, it's important to stick to the facts. Never embellish or add hyperbole that could mislead the potential buyer

"Amazing Seussian creatures, including some just for the game!" - The Cat in the Hat, PS2
- Okay, here's the problem: this game shipped in 2003. Dr Seuss died in 1991. So, these extra creatures created specially for the game can't really be all that "Seussian," can they?

"Thousands of hours of replay value" - Gallop Racer 2001, PS2
- Only a person who went broke betting on real-world horse races could play a hardcore horse-racing sim for thousands of hours. And that guy sold his PS2 to help pay off his bets a long, long time ago.

"Gorgeous special effects and incredible game play!" - Army Men: Sarge's Heroes 2
- Just to let you in on the irony here: they weren't and it wasn't.