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Why we hate gamers who can't admit they suck

They make playing in the same room as them miserable

This experience was more prevalent when people actually went to arcades and you got to compete against random strangers, but really most of us have encountered this with friends or acquaintances sitting on a couch. Typically the halfwit will start off with some gentle ribbing and some premature boasting about their skills, but things turn dark rather quickly.


Above: “You realize if you use the sniper rifle one more time, we’re no longer friends, right?” 

Since you’re there in person, they won’t explode into internet nerd rage, so they become a more subdued, seething vortex that gradually siphons all of your fun away. They might make snide jabs designed to take away the satisfaction of your victory, let the excuses roll off their tongue at each failure to make a comeback, or they’ll just become utterly silent. When your purpose for playing is to do a little smack talk and let out exasperated exclamations at close matches, having a silent partner is about as fun as mute sex. The misery builds the longer the silence goes until finally they throw their controller down and stomp away.


They bring entire teams down and blame everyone else

In videogames, often your team is not as strong as its weakest link. Due to the structure of most competitive multiplayer modes, it’s usually the case that your team is as strong as your best player, with a slight dragging down by the worst. It’s why good players often talk about “carrying” their team. There are cases, though, when the worst player can ruin the whole team. If they’re stupid and charge repeatedly into a quick respawn screen during Team Deathmatch, well then they’re just giving the other team points. If they do an insane strategy in an RTS and refuse to coordinate with team mates, a smart opposing team can easily exploit those poor choices.


Above: Kid on left: “All these adults are playing like idiots! Why aren’t they using our awesome blitz tactic?” Kid on right: “Wait, wait, let me get my headset…” 

If these were just bad players, we could give them a pass. We all have to be bad at the beginning of our career in a game. But we’re talking about bad players who won’t admit they’re bad, so we end up with the obnoxious stream of text or voice chat blaming everyone else for their own incompetence. When you’re the worst of the worst but think you’re above average, how could you possibly see that your play was the cause of defeat? If only those morons understood your amazing strategy and followed your orders instead of doing their own thing, you would have won easily! The sad part is that the slightly less bad players actually know they’re bad, and they’re better than the ones who think they’re good.


They’re the first to talk shit when they get lucky and beat you

You could be a one-person stampede just trampling the shit out of the other team, but when one of them finally shoots you in the back after you’ve plowed through three other opponents and have only a sliver of life left and you’re reloading, you’ll get that message: “Owned.” No, children, that’s not how it works. There’s no “ownage” unless you beat an opponent fair-and-square, and pulling it off one in thirty tries still doesn’t count.


Above: “That’s right, my kill/death ratio is 1/23 so IN YOUR FACE!” 

On a similar note, these fuck faces also tend to talk shit before they’ve had a chance to prove their worth, and then run away like the simpering cowards they are when they get their asses e-handed to them. One time we were playing Warcraft III and began a match against a player we’d never encountered before. As soon as the match began, we received the message, “Fuck you up ass noob fuck.” We responded with a polite, “Ok.” The match then proceeded in textless silence until we roundly boxed the filthy-mouthed runt’s ears. Normally we refrain from trash talking, preferring to be a good e-sportsman, but in this case we decided a little “Where’s your shit-talking now?” was warranted. As we began to type this phrase as our opponent’s base crumbled, the embarrassed nincompoop made a quiet escape and quit without a word, robbing us of a satisfying comeback.


Their stupid advice prevents new players from getting better

If these dullards could just step back and see that they lose more games than they win, they’d refrain from dispensing wisdom to new players asking for tips. Pro-tip: check to make sure you’re a pro before giving tips. You don’t really need to be a pro to give good advice, but we couldn’t resist that attempt at a clever play on words. Still, you really do need to make sure you don’t suck horribly before you tell newbies what weapons are effective or how they should totally practice the innovative strategy you made up that will “totally catch your opponent off-guard.”


Above: “I’m a freaking genius at StarCraft. Listen to me, or face your doom…”

Another irritating aspect of this is that the armchair Pattons will discount the worth of techniques designed to eke out increments of advantage. So when some newbie asks, “Should I remap that vital action to somewhere on the keyboard closer to my left hand?” you’ll get the ignorant fools saying “No you don’t need to do that I totally reach all the way over to the number pad to heal myself in combat and I do just fine.” No. See, good players understand that if you can eliminate inefficiency, you should do it. A red flag for discovering a bad player is if you hear them say “No you don’t need to do that.” Another favorite term of bad players is “cookie-cutter.” It’s their attempt to disparage the effective tactics that good players figured out, which then became popular because of their effectiveness. In all competitive games, there are certain things you need to do. Bad players gravitate toward avoiding the needed elements out of a misguided view that they can have creative, innovative approaches. We used to do this exact thing, thinking we were going to win by being different.


Above: “No listen you totally want a planetary fortress in your main base in case you get rushed. It’s way better than that cookie-cutter crap, you don’t need those Mules for extra minerals”

Note that we’re not saying you can’t innovate. The best players innovate. The problem is that bad players don’t understand what innovation means. What bad players do is devise harebrained schemes from random elements without understanding whether the result will work. Innovation is not merely being creative; it’s creating something new that then changes the way the game is played at the highest level because it works better than some previous strategy. The terribads look down their noses at “cookie-cutter” players because the pros are “afraid to innovate.” The truth is, those top players already tried those crappy inventive strategies and realized they suck.

Topics

Week of Hate

101 comments

  • Descuffphoenix - May 8, 2011 4:55 p.m.

    So I been playing black ops for more than 3 weeks before psn was down and the people that appeared to be the best just plain suck (not most of them). I actually found myself carrying entire team of prestige players.
  • CaffieKuriboh - May 3, 2011 7:46 a.m.

    great article. the whole time i was reading this i was thinking of my nephews. they actually get into fist fights with eachother over being shot WHILE PLAYING HALO!!! LOL
  • crumbdunky - May 3, 2011 1:23 a.m.

    I like to think I'm pretty honest ABOUT being terribad but now i'm confused because apparently KNOWING I truly suck means there's someone who is both deluded AND WORSE at games than me? Is this kind of like the first step for recovering from an addiction being admitting the problem? Because I'm also a junkie-which may or may not tie into the fact i'm a crappy gamer. Being fair, though, i think most of us gamers know what our relative places on the skill ladder of a given game may be and while my aging and slightly wonky and drug fuelled hand eye coordination are fair and reasonable escuses for some of my usual mess ups I will confess that knowing I suck a bit means it's rarely MY fault my side loses(never my fault we win either, mind-I'm not deluded at all)because I can, at least, tell when doing a certain thing is getting me very dead, very much and being most crappy for my side. In these cases I do what ANY gamer should and STOP doing said idiocy right away to prevent taking a team down with me. Now, here's where I think i MAY not be the worst in the universe and it's only this article that's given me hope: SOME players, and I've seen a lot of them in my time, DO NOT EVER stop doing the thing that kills them every single respawn. Why do they do this? If I don't even do it it MUST be stupid and stubborn. They'll take the same route along the same ridge every spawn and get nailed in the bonce by the same sniper for a whole round of whatever you're playing. So, now I think of it there may be a race of gamers below even myself(as I DEFINITELY don't think I'm above average at many games AT ALL)but i'#m concerned that thinking this might be the start of a delusion meaning i'm actually WORSE than i realise. Have I got hope from this article or cause to worry that i'm actually arrogant enough to be truly terribad? Also, does it make any difference that I get REALLY pissed off when people on forums make out an obviously HARD task or game is a piece of piss when it clearly isn't-maybe only to the very greatest gamers out there and ?i fail to believe that the first five commenters after anyone says they found ANYTHING difficult in a game all happen to have found it so easy as to find the poor soul who struggled totally hilarious in their lack of talent. But,that's just me hating .liars again isn't it? I'm not alone in hating forumites who're brilliant and beat Battletoads on their fist go two years before they were even born, am I? I'm a dad of three and have a partner who's a GOOD gamer(great at certain games too she is-don't play against her at Warhawk or challenge her to Sonic2 speedruns. Just don't)and am easily the worst gamer in the house despite having gamed the longest. When your youngest finally joins the "I can beat dad at everything" club at about seven you know your place. You KNOW it. But today I have, maybe delusional, hope that I'm not the VERY worst out there mainly because I know i suck, mostly, and do the decent thing and hide in FPS rather than let my team down to the point of defeat!! The WORST thing in online shooters, though, and we ALL see it all the time is where someone who's sucked for ages that session suddenly gets one good round(usually gets lucky by opening someone elses drop in COD kind of thing and the crate has attack dogs)and then proceed to gloat about their game changing performance in TDM when even then their score is barely in positive KDR(u know 12 kills, 11 deaths and third on the losing team with ONE actual kill down to them shooting someone who spawned in front of them)-so I suppose the signs of this delusion are all round me all the time. Interesting. If only I wasn't so off my face, old and run ragged by kids I could make sense of it. Whatever, today I gained HOPE through hate. Thankyou-even if it's not actual hope itself but m,e developing ,my terribadness by thinking there are worse layers than myself!
  • Xdracon - May 2, 2011 3:25 p.m.

    I have to say sometimes it is funny to be in a game with these people because they flip out and start screaming like crazy. Then it eventually gets annoy and you mute them or kick them from your game.
  • EdGax30 - May 2, 2011 11:26 a.m.

    Yeah i can't stand people like this. Especially the shit talking cowards who hide behind they're consoles and wouldn't think twice about saying the things they say to someone's face. I play video games often so i'm pretty good at'em. I pretty much kick everyone's ass that i know personally at most games i play but online's a totally different story. Sometimes i do great and sometimes i suck balls. The thing is there's always someone better than you and some people's ego's just can't handle that. So anyways, great article. You've described alot of people i know.
  • DeathbyFira - May 1, 2011 7:02 p.m.

    lol everytime i beat my friends in a fighting game they are always saying i am spaming moves or some shit and all i do is block and get close and combo them i do admit i suck at raceing games and i dont beat most of games which are mostly rpgs or fighting games ither and dont get me started on first person shooters but i do admit it and it is more enjoyable when i do win a match or beat the snot out of someone cuz it makes them more pissed omg this noob is kicking my ass nooooo! but great article i do seem to see alot of this sterotypes in video games 'hint hint my best friend is one of them lol"
  • FrankWest246 - May 1, 2011 6:02 p.m.

    what about those people on COD who think that just because their (Insert #) prestiged that there some kind of master of COD, when really they just plain suck, i played aganst this guy who kept claming that the only reason he was losing is because he prestiges alot, and that the only reason i was winning was because i dont prestige, the dude had like 94 hours on the game, i had 18, and i kicked his ass every round... the fact that i dont prestige had nothing to do with him sucking.
  • inconceivable - May 1, 2011 5:49 p.m.

    I'm pretty bad at playing online. (Not a terribad though, I promise). Of course, I never play online because I suck, so the cycle of awfulness continues!
  • yesIusetheM14 - May 1, 2011 12:13 a.m.

    Reminds me of someone I know... he has absoluetly no idea what he's talking about. Just look; Me:Dammit, when is Treyarch going to patch second chance and the AK74? Him: What? Those are both fair! Tomahawks need to be patched because they're one-hit-kills! Yes, this was a real conversation and no, I haven't played a private match with him since. Also, he claims I should have a KDR at least twice as high as his (0.75) because I've been playing since CoD4 and my KDR is 1.15. Keep in mind that he uses second chance pro, AK74u, and pretty much whatever else Treyarch hasn't nerfed the hell out of, while I use the M14 (hence the name), FN FAL and MAC11.
  • gruser01 - April 30, 2011 11:59 p.m.

    bryanthelion, I also agree with you too. Sometimes the "great players" can ruin it for the "non-great" or the first timers with their remarks/comments, which in return loses friendships or causes fights.
  • bryanthelion - April 30, 2011 9:59 p.m.

    I think you're dismissing how "Good players" can ruin the community. I can tell you for hours and hours how terrible I am at LoL, but I will never get any better when all I hear is "GTFO, n00b." or "Uninstall this game immediately." For when I try to take down the towers while they keep up their pissing contest with the enemy players, not getting any towers. I took their advice and stopped playing. Or, when "good players" make you play a game that you're awful at. I played Halo 2 with these douche-bag twins that I thought were my good friends at the time, I pretty much fed them for hours of my life while getting frustrated beyond my mind for being forced to play a game that I was horrible at and I grew to hate.
  • gruser01 - April 30, 2011 5 p.m.

    Ya, I hate it when they think they are all that but yet you see them at the the bottom of the list doing poorly. I also hate that sometimes I get stuck with a whole group that suck and can't learn how to back up a teammate when he needs help.
  • philipshaw - April 30, 2011 1:22 p.m.

    Great article and I have a couple of friends who are like this
  • Sleuth - April 30, 2011 8:11 a.m.

    You had me laughing several times while reading this splendid article. This is why I come to GR.
  • tlopezkid - April 30, 2011 7:19 a.m.

    Also, if I ever play with someone who seems too good, maybe a hacker, I try to play a few games with them instead of leaving and reporting them after one game. Most of the time if I can find out their strategy they don't fare nearly as well the 2nd or 3rd game. But I use my headset to communicate with teammates and try to win games, not just to talk shit to people who might be better than me or to piss on people who aren't as good...
  • tlopezkid - April 30, 2011 7:13 a.m.

    I'm fairly decent at FPS games but I don't mind playing with people who aren't great as long as they TRY. I really hate people who join games on their "2nd" account and throw games just to piss off their team mates because they don't care about any of their stats.
  • AuthorityFigure - April 30, 2011 5:09 a.m.

    Anyone who talks trash, and anyone who considers themselves elite are under the impression that the game makers respect them more for being proficient at their product or game. This is hopelessly misguided.
  • TopNewt - April 30, 2011 12:10 a.m.

    Awesome article!
  • Limbo - April 29, 2011 11:14 p.m.

    Oh so very true. I have one friend who sucks at every video game made, so he purposely just ruins the experience for everyone else by "not trying" and dicking around. I also have a friend who isn't too great at Halo, so when I beat him almost every game he gets mad and ruins the entire day. Good article.
  • Mboy1100 - April 29, 2011 10:15 p.m.

    *typical suckgamer theoryy* "I cant suck, therefore you must be cheating!"

Showing 1-20 of 101 comments

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