What to say to the guy who comments "First!!!!"

Typical “Firsts”

10 characters who know smoking is cool 
Gaming’s greatest role models light up for the children

That’s right, Beerhaunter. You can do better. And Z-man427, you may want to be sure it’s clear who you’re responding to from now on. It almost sounds like you’re telling us our article could have been better.

These consoles are fake!
A collection of gaming's coolest and crappiest mocked-up machines

We hate to tell you this, but… oh, nevermind.

EXCLUSIVE Conduit screens depict three Washington DC locales
Check out the White House, Washington Monument, and Library of Congress...and some aliens

Why two comments? There wasn’t enough time to write that sometimes the game looks nice, sometimes it looks bland and it may or may not be fun in the first comment?

E3 09: Why the amazing new demos prove motion control can't work in hardcore gaming
The better the tech, the clearer the real problem

We like this one because it shows how nobody really wants to be “that guy” but you end up being him anyway.

Fan Art versus Official Art
A showdown between fan-made creations and their official counterparts

This one gets the award for most exclamation points used for a “first” for a comment that’s obviously not even close to the first one, and it gets a nice recognition for albinomonkey90’s keen observation that neither of the “first” posters were first.

13 greatest enemies that are also round
A look at our oval opposition, rotund rivals and circular competition

One, two, three, four, five, six people are first – this one just gets silly. Technically, we think everyone is correct, except jamminontha1n2 - he’s not even close.

TalkRadar 43 - Not for adults?
We endure horrible celebrity voiceovers and discover a new love between Animal Crossing and children

Not even GamesRadar Editors are impervious to the alluring void of an empty first comment box, mostly Charlie Barratt though.

A Swing and a Miss

40 FREE and addictive games
We add more free titles to our already gigantic archive of over 400 gratis games

It can’t be everyone’s birthday all the time.

TalkRadar 56 - mystery and science
Atari history, interviews with the MST3K crew and a special guest from Giant Bomb

One man’s internal dialogue manifests itself in the comment boxes. It’s rare to have the opportunity to see someone’s psyche so nakedly displayed.

Class of Heroes
An awkward marriage between hardcore exploring and softcore combat

Anyone can be the first commenter on a review, so it obviously doesn’t count for anything. Now being “first” for an article, well, that’s much more important.

Games invade Google Street View
Did they really think no-one would notice?

Hint: when checking to see if anyone has already said “first,” the best place to look is the first comment.

100 reasons fanboys hate casual games
Our bilious video bashes the most despicable of all genres

The often spoken of, but rarely seen, infamous triple-first post has few examples better than the one found on our 100 reasons fanboys hate casual games page. The way miningguyx360 ironically points out that fanboys also hate the repetitive nature of casual games, followed by his realization and horror at what he’s done by being the third user to type “first,” nicely ties together this whole section of comments.


  • PatHan-bHai - June 25, 2013 4:44 a.m.

    Last! :P
  • Pocotron - September 9, 2009 9:07 p.m.

    Last!!!!!! LOLOLOLOLOLOL! Or first from newest first!
  • hooterscpufantasm - July 26, 2009 11:41 p.m.

    @animeman dude, how many fists did u think we thought you had (or that we even cared to know) also..... FIRST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! you may not get this until 24 days and 2 hours after the posting, though i also can see the future and have the power of telekinesis so back off
  • Marshmellow - July 10, 2009 11:12 p.m.

    two hundred eleventh why have you made an artical about the attention seeking dwebs who comment first. I mean here we are politly ingnoring them in the hope they'll go away and youn go an give them an endorcement. it's not like the read the articals so why do it?
  • Kaeda - July 10, 2009 11:32 a.m.

    Hilarious. Especially your own little "First" at the end. In the name and spirit of this article... 210th!!!!!
  • kryptkeeper666 - July 10, 2009 9:43 a.m.

    30 bucks says almost all the removed comments are ppl talking about "First" Shit.
  • blizzard101 - July 9, 2009 1:37 p.m.

  • Bossco - July 8, 2009 9:14 p.m.

    206th! No one is going to read this far down anyway, I can say what I like. Hairy arse donkey fucker!
  • Hobogonigal - August 31, 2012 11:27 p.m.

    I saw it. For shame, for shame...
  • First - July 7, 2009 12:17 p.m.

    I joined this website after reading this hilarious article, it had me crying with laughter. Btw people who complain about 'first' posters are gay goody two shoes who don't have the balls or finger dexterity to say first.
  • Turkeykilla7 - July 7, 2009 12:05 p.m.

    And 200 and FIRST. Im so awsome I stole 2 spaces. Oh my word, my First 200 hundred and FIRST. super Pwnies
  • Turkeykilla7 - July 7, 2009 noon

    200th WOOOOT Thats a great Number. This is Tots Super Pwnies. Suck on that Bill Cosby. Suck it.
  • Terminator58 - July 7, 2009 7:08 a.m.

    OMFG, funniest article iv ever read. i had 2 make an acount just so i could say... FUCK YEAH MOTHERFUCKERS NUMBER 198 BITCHES SUCK MY COCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  • JelloPuddingP0ps - July 6, 2009 4:31 p.m.

  • Xplosive59 - July 6, 2009 3:35 p.m.

    one hundred and eighty ninth YES there i did it or first if you read it backwards first @ Gmilf71 i did
  • nyef - July 6, 2009 3:31 p.m.

    @the lurcher yeah kinda funny how many "first" posts were reported for not being first. Paul Ryan beat them all to it... that's why I'm playing it safe at 189th...
  • The_Lurcher - July 6, 2009 2:04 p.m.

    wow alot of people have tried to be ironic about shouting first on an article about how shouting first is a BAD IDEA and have Failed miserably... oh and ZOMG I CAN'T BELIEVE PAUL RYAN SAID MY USERNAME but i can't tell if he's insulting me for ranting (i do that extremely well! (well im english what did you expect)) or congratulating me for telling all those people that first is for people who can only count to 1. ReCAPTCHA: today infested
  • gmilf71 - July 6, 2009 2:42 a.m.

    no one's gonna read this so.... FUCK BALLS TITTIES DILDO PENIS BALLS SHIT IN YOUR MOUTH OLOLOLOLOLOL. If someone did read this, I appologize.
  • gmilf71 - July 6, 2009 2:40 a.m.

    so theres a group of penguins and they see a slide. so they all went on it. the first penguin says: "weeee!" the second penguin says:"yay!!" the third penguin says:" I'm a radio!!!!" btw, i got 180th. that is an important number, right?
  • GrantG - July 6, 2009 12:36 a.m.


Showing 1-20 of 211 comments

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