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What if Mario wasn't the famous brother?


The fall of Mario

Overlooked in the original Mario Bros, the Italian toilet jockey is forced to play the sidekick in Luigi games for over two decades. Eventually, after years of begging, Nintendo finally cave and give him his own game. The results, and Metacritic rating, ain't pretty...

With his video game career stalling fast, Mario is forced to make increasingly degrading public appearances, which include showing up at children's birthday parties. Pin the tail on the plumber is an instant hit with the sprogs.

Meanwhile, Luigi: The Motion Picture goes onto break all box office records, bagging 11 Oscars in the process.

Eventually, Mario reaches breaking point when the people of Italy erect a huge golden idol to honour his awesome, talented and sickeningly rich brother.

Sleep well, old friend. We'll just console ourselves with the frankly amazing Super Luigi Galaxy 2.

Aug 13, 2010


 

42 comments

  • guiarherodrummer1998 - August 16, 2010 6:40 p.m.

    Luigi Kart Wii, anyone?
  • FuzzyBee - August 16, 2010 5:54 p.m.

    Nice article, Dave :)
  • FlamingChaos35 - August 16, 2010 3:22 p.m.

    What about Mario's Mansion?
  • greenjoker - August 15, 2010 5:46 p.m.

    bahahhahahah
  • HawtKakez - August 14, 2010 10:52 p.m.

    Also, there is an internet craze for "Maiyo" with a beady eyed Mario staring at something.
  • slimjim441 - August 14, 2010 10:39 p.m.

    Mario looks more depressed than 'Prostitute Mickey.'
  • RonaldRayGun - August 14, 2010 5:54 p.m.

    That was interesting
  • philipshaw - August 14, 2010 11:45 a.m.

    The last image was super dark
  • AuthorityFigure - August 14, 2010 11:04 a.m.

    So, does that mean Luigi gets Peach, or a famous version of Daisy?
  • Ddz53 - August 14, 2010 1:53 a.m.

    tall vs short slim vs fat green vs red slick mustache vs untrimmed mustache Luigi wins
  • hardcore_gamer1990 - August 14, 2010 12:41 a.m.

    Mario would control as Fat Wario did in Warioland 4 (which would never exist), in comparison to Luigi's superiour speed and jumping abilities. Oh, and he's have gripy shoes for once. And Waluigi would be a relevant evil character. *shudders*
  • wud03 - August 13, 2010 11:13 p.m.

    lol lucas...
  • Metroidhunter32 - August 13, 2010 11:09 p.m.

    You could have done so much more with this. It feels like you just sort of slopped a few ideas together, the article doesn't feel complete.
  • shyfonzie - August 13, 2010 10:46 p.m.

    It doesn't really look like that gilr is going to pin the tail on Mario. Great article. NOW EVERYBODY GONNA PAY ATTENTION TO WEEEGEEEE.
  • ViewtifulBrandon - August 13, 2010 10:17 p.m.

    So if the whole world is turned upside down is Microsoft's mascot Blinx the cat or the kid from grabbed by the ghoulies?
  • SillyPigeon - August 13, 2010 10:12 p.m.

    LOL at Luigi & Tails at the olympic games. I've always loved Tails
  • Felixthecat - August 13, 2010 8:43 p.m.

    Forgot to say that Bowser > Luigi. I'm sorry. I want Bowser to have a game dedicated to him first, THEN Luigi's Mansion 2, Nintendo.
  • GOD - August 13, 2010 7:33 p.m.

    Hey now GR, don't start giving Sega more bad sonic game ideas, ex: Tails and the Black Knight and Tails Unleashed(I guess he'd be a werefox?)
  • coolman229 - August 13, 2010 7:31 p.m.

    What about Mario's Mansion?! That game was awesome!
  • MinxRiot - August 13, 2010 7:23 p.m.

    Idk man, I could live in a world of Luigi. I always liked him better anyways. Just saying.

Showing 1-20 of 42 comments

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