Top 10 Pokemon who are the biggest jerks

That's a real jerk move

Pokemon is all about the friendship and trust that can form between a young adult and a wild animal wielding magical powers. It's the cornerstone of the franchise: that Pokemon aren't just weapons or tools, but allies and friends. 'You teach me and I'll teach you' and all that. That's all well and good, but the problem is not all Pokemon are really friendship material. Some are just assholes.

There are a lot of different factors that can contribute to a Pokemon being an asshole. Some just have a bad personality, or tend to pop up a bit too often. However, others are more sadistic, combining a frustrating move set with an equally-annoying trait, creating a fighting force that'll drain your Pokemon's health points... as well as your soul. These are the top ten worst offenders.

#10 - Bidoof

The worst part is Bidoof dominates the tall grass. I think, deep down, Bidoof realizes it exists to make other Pokemon look better by comparison. All of a sudden that Kakuna doesn't look so bad when the eight Pokemon you saw before it were all Bidoofs. Maybe that's why Bidoof is always harassing you. It knows you don't like it, and it's spiteful.

#09 - Snover

The worst part is the hail. Hail is the most annoying weather condition in the game. It doesn't have the high-level, strategic benefits of rain or a sandstorm (weather conditions you can base a whole team on). No, it just wastes your time. And Snover, well, this little guy whips up a hail storm as soon as it enters battle.

#08 - Graveler

The worst part is Graveler loves using self destruct. Caves are a bad time in Pokemon games, and the Gravelers tendency to blow themselves up at random doesn't help the matter. Here you are, trying to grind out some late-game experience points, and these little bastards don't even have the common courtesy to die - excuse me, faint - correctly. Sheesh.

#07 - Tentacool

The worst part is Tentacool wants to be your new best friend. That's why he keeps showing up in seemingly every open body of water you visit. Want to pop on over to Cinnabar Island? Your old buddy Tentacool is there. Fishing for a cool new water Pokemon? Your old buddy Tentacool is there! Trying to get away from all those Tentacools? YOUR OLD BUDDY TENTACOOL IS THERE!!

#06 - Blissey

The worst part is fighting another player's Blissey is like fighting a brick wall made out of concrete. If you don't have something to counter this beast you're basically hosed because it just won't die. Wish and protect keep Blissey on life support while it slowly, agonizingly whittles down your Pokemon into nothing. And it's so damn cheerful about it too.

#05 - Voltorb

The worst part is Voltorb is designed to LOOK like an item (or maybe it's the other way around). We've all been there: walking around some run-down power plant and you spot what is hopefully a potion only to discover that - fuck you - it's actually a Voltorb. Have fun getting hit by sonic boom over and over again.

#04 - Whimsicott

The worst part is this little bundle of hate packs two flavors of pain. First, its prankster trait means it can reliably use status-effecting moves first in a turn. And second, well, let's just say leech seed, stun spore, taunt and others are much easier to deal with if you can get a shot off first.

#03 - Jirachi

The worst part is Jirachi has access to the serene grace trait, which doubles the chance of a move having an additional effect. What this means is if you run into a Jirachi using, say, body slam or iron head it'll basically lock you out of playing the game because you'll be suffering from paralysis or flinching each turn.

#02 - Zubat

The worst part is Zubats are everywhere. They're in your dreams, your nightmares. The sheer frequency with which you encounter these little demons is so intense that they have become, arguably, THE most hated pokemon in existence. But they're still not the biggest assholes. No, that title goes to

#01 - Missingno.

The worst part is Missingno. can screw up your save data. Which, if you think about it, is the ultimate insult a Pokemon could inflict; it's basically super effective against you, the player. If you're willing to play with fire, Missingno. CAN be used to gain a ton of rare candies, but is that really worth the risk?

The jerk store called

If you or someone you know is currently teaming up with one of the Pokemon listed in this feature, take action. One of the greatest contributing factors to a young adult's emotional development is who he or she chooses to spend time with. Don't let yourself or someone you know fall in with the wrong crowd and turn into a total asshole like Zubat or Graveler.

And for more Pokemon fun take a look at The Top 7... weirdest theories about the Pokemon universe and Top 20 most awkward middle-stage Pokemon.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Maxwell grew up on a sleepy creekbank deep in the South. His love for video games has taken him all the way to the West Coast and beyond.
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