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Top 10 Grand Theft Auto secrets

7) Police brutality

In the back of Pershing Square police station, San Andreas

The forces of law and order in GTA are keen - perhaps overzealous is more the word. Police brutality has always been hinted at (helicopter gunners occasionally shout “I’m gonna kill you!” only to be chastised by their pilots as early as GTA III), but in San Andreas it’s explicit. Still hidden away, mind, a guilty little secret - take a look in the car pound below the police station and you’ll find two cops beating Rodney Ki... a suspect. They scatter when you arrive, but you saw them, right? Be aware just going in gives you a wanted rating.

6) Blue Hotel

The Washington Beach area of Vice City

As day turns to night, the guests in this hotel innocently switch their lights on… and make the shape of a giant bits-and-pieces in the process. OK, it’s not there all the time - the shapes cycle through various less rude-looking ones - but it’s certainly there often enough. Sometimes it’s even there when the rooftop fountain spurts its quarter-hourly load into the cool night air, and if that looks even more suspicious, well, that’s just coincidence. Surely. Head in by air over Starfish Island and you’re sure to spot it.

5) Dead funny

Romero Funerals, Little Havana, Vice City

See this? Despite some very stiff competition, this is the most pun-laden sign ever to appear in Grand Theft Auto. This spot in Little Havana - worryingly close to the Cluckin’ Bell and really suspiciously close to the butcher’s shop at number three in this list - is apparently the ‘dead centre of Vice City,’ and the funeral parlour is a place where ‘it’s always a good mouring’. What’s more, you ‘won’t bereave’ their prices and they ‘really dig graves’… that’s right, it’s the most pun-tastic sign there is, and not a willy gag in sight. Good work, Rockstar!

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6 comments

  • brownsnake01 - April 18, 2012 6:16 a.m.

    romero could reference john romero - the famous zombie movie director. hence him being the manager of a place FOR dead people
  • jordanwhite - May 20, 2010 5:25 p.m.

    There are lights but they are just that, lights, they are balls of light with a white line trailing behind them.
  • JosefMotley - January 2, 2010 9:16 a.m.

    i hate all the obviously made up secrets as much as the next man but i have to say i too have seen these lights in the sky. and in the sea, i swam over to one and it kind of flew off. they don't look so much like UFOs as little glitchy suns. i just thought it was a typical bug. and the planes falling out the sky thing has happened to me LOADS
  • Gingerbread - October 23, 2008 1:33 a.m.

    i knew about a couple of these but still those are pretty crazy! wow...
  • Joey_1001 - September 21, 2008 5:16 p.m.

    Woah loads of stuff i didnt no there but the lights in the sky one is TRUE just google Jammy_0002 he is ma mate n he gave me a copy of his san andreas save file and he has a complete collection of strange lights in the sky on his photo album so they do exist, or in your words, HIT.
  • Mace_Starwalker - January 10, 2009 10:13 p.m.

    hey u forgot about the secret it Vice city stories yo. This is a glitch that unlocks the second island early. You know that police bribe that lowers your wanted level on that mound of dirt/sand near escobar international and an empire site in Little Havanna? Well theres a pipe behind it..you jump from top of mound onto the pipe again and again until you glitch through the ground and u make a faceplant into leaf links. Another way is you take a yankee truck and go to starfish island, diaz's mansion and park it facing away from second island as close to water as you can with rite weels touching bridge (you should have a tree on ur rite)get out of the truck jump on top of it and get to back of the truck's roof and jump towards the bridge. You should end up on the pedestrian walkway and on the other side of the invisible wall. Congrats you just unlocked the second island EARLY.

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