TMNT

If you’re anything like us here at GamesRadar, you heard that Ubisoft was making a new Turtles game and you got at least a little excited. You instantly flashed back to those good ol’ days playing the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles arcade games on the NES and were filled with all the giddy mouser-robot slashing anticipation of your childhood. Take our advice: go back to those NES classics, in all their 8-bit glory. They're better than this game and you’ll like 'em more; that is, unless you hate fun, then by all means play TMNT for the PSP.

Above: All Screens are from the 360 version - trust us, you prefer it this way.

TMNT tries its little ninja hand at many things, and does exactly none of them well. At first it wants to grow up and be a platformer, but it has a lot of growing to do. It doesn’t let you do the platforming by yourself; instead it holds your hand and guides you through the entire game. The best way to describe it is that it’s on-rails platforming. All the jumping is regulated to the face buttons: press square to take the right route, triangle for the forward, and circle for the left.

This is about as fun as sitting and pressing buttons for four hours, which is about how long you’ll be doing it if you want to finish the game. This is also where the multiplayer happens in what the game calls “Ninja Tag,” which is a race form of these platforming sections. The only half-way fun part of these mind numbing sections is when you get a good rhythm going, you gain “ninja speed,” which enables you to move through the repetitive, bland levels a little faster. But it's really only fun because it gets you closer to being done with the game.